I hate my parents. and I hate my enviornment and my college. I have noone to talk to. What should I do?

Question

I hate where I live and the people around me. But I seriously hate my parents. My mom gives me food and everything but she wasn't there for me when I really needed her, for emotional/psychological support. She also is so overdominating and controlling, but over-sheltering at the same time, Which as a result, impaired my developement. Whenever I try to tell Her how bad I feel, she just smiles and walks away. That really pisses me off. My dad is a total asshole, because he just sits in his damn room 24/7 eat, sleep, and talks **** to me. I swear there's more to life than just eating I tell my mom, but she just walks away... Also it's really hard to tell if she really loves me, because she's indifferent to what I really need, but she gives me food. I have no real friends, and everyone I try to talk to doesn't understand, and either laughs, or blames me. They truly don't know what I've been through in my life. even though i'm young, i've had some horrible pain.

I am 18 years old

Answer 1

I was once faced with a problem like yours but a good deal more dire, and at an older age. You have two choices, and there aren't pretty ones. One,, you can cut yourself off from your mother, and since I am sure that you know really deep down that she loves you very much, and she has had to deal with allot of pain herself, hurt her more. Or,, you can see the fact that she has had to deal with pain, maybe even more than you, and you can try to be her friend and get to know her,, and make her life better, and in doing so, save a mother for yourself, and gain a friend. Which will you choose?
I'll give you a clue. One hurts less than the other.

Answer 2

You are not going to get new friends with all that hate and pain in your life. You must try to look forward to the future when you can decide for yourself where you want to live etc. but until then you have to make the best of your situation at home. Try to be happier and work hard at college instead of hating it make new friends and join activities that are going on there that is the way to make new friends. Your mum probably worries about you too much have a talk with her do not let her walk away from you explain how you really feel, you will become a parent one day and believe me it is the hardest job in the world. Good luck.

Answer 3

Sounds like teenageitas to me!

We all go through this stage in life when we hate everything and everyone,in some cases it was fashion eg punk rock.

I have a saying:-

"If you keep on doing what you are doing,you will always get what you have got"!

You seem closer to your Mum than your Dad,so work with your Mum for now,try to get her out of the local environment so she has no distractions,then you will be able to talk to her.Do not lose you temper and most of all LISTEN,let her finish all of her statements good or bad.
Ask her how you can get through to you Dad,you might not like the answer,don't argue or interrupt.Work with you Mum to bridge the gap with your Dad.
Do this now and be a leader in pulling your family back together or do nothing and see it crumble away.
When was the last time you went out as a Family,you our probably way off this,but make it your goal.
If you are keen try researching "Maslows" theory

http://chiron.valdosta.edu/whuitt/col/regsys/maslow.html

This is just one of many sites.

There is always someone to talk to,if your friends won't listen try cousins,if you have no cousins or extended family then you must call chidline or the Samaritans.

Remember this starts with you so do something,"every great journey starts with a first step",so take that step and good luck.

Answer 4

I can understand what your going thru. The best thing to do if your unhappy with the place your life is in right now is to change it !!! Write down all the things that you hate about your life. Then figure out how you can change each one so that its what u want. Its up to you to change it ! If you hate being around your parents keep your life busy so you dont have to sit at home. Go out and get some type of job that keeps you busy or join some type of group that way u will be forced to be around people and you might make some friends at the same time. YOU CAN CHOOSE TO BE HAPPY OR CHOOSE TO BE IN PAIN... its easier to sit home and be angry about where your life is... but its alot more rewarding to go out and create the life you want. Dont let your parents drag u down and make you depressed.. ITs a waste of time... Choose to have fun and do what you want to do !! Good luck :)

Answer 5

OK Look it go and join something like the ATC and see life with action, get a life you only live it once do something.
Your parents sound as if they are possibly living the old way, father feels it difficult to talk to daughter about things, including dare I say sex, mother afraid of the outside world.
Do not blame them. As I said try the ATC.

Answer 6

It's entirely possible that, with some miles between you, and a few years of living as an independent adult, you will develop a tolerance for their odd behavior, since you won't have to put up with it every day. As to if it's immoral, probably not. Try it for a few months, and don't make it an Eternal Vow! And if they're still obnoxious, don't talk to them for another few.

Answer 7

I think the food thing is her way of showing love - it may be that she's not good at communicating particularly about emotional things: it may be that she doesn't know how to handle your unhappiness. It's hard being a parent as we only have the emotional resources that our own childhood has given us. Openess is a two way thing - both of you need to be open with each other.

Answer 8

im sorry babe thats horrible.....i can relate....in a very small way. i was living with my aunt and uncle while i was going to school and i never felt like they cared at all or would ever let me into their world...all i heard 24/7 is how i was f**king up my life.my advice to u is to transfer schools start over...live independently for awhile...make some friends that will really care for u and love u and support u when u need them too....i feel ur pain...not to feel loved is a horrible feeling but i dont think its possible for a mother not to love their child.

Answer 9

Hi,
Yes, you sound like you're still in horrible pain; and my heart goes out to you.
Adults and parents mainly cannot always understand the needs of their own children, and it's because they're too close to them, they're involved and can't see what wrong; Not until someone else makes it clear to them. They need a new pair of eyes.
In your case, it sounds to me like you would all need family counselling; If you could find someone who would convince your parents to go to see a counsellor with you.
Most probably, your mum must think that you're going through one of those teenagers's stages, when you're all stressed and give importance to usless matters in her eyes, and where you want to change the world.
Because it is one of the stages teenagers go through. I would know, it happened to me.
Still, it does also sound to me like what's happening here is deeper, and that your mum'd need someone to tell her that she does have to properly listen to you and involve you more in her decision making since you're at an age you can take an active participation in what happens to you.
Also, you can already talk to your gp. Don't worry, he can't report anything to your parents unless you ask him to.
What you need is to unburden yourself with what is bothering you so much. This pain you are still experiencing.
Talk about it. Don't let it spoil your life.
Good luck.

Answer 10

shame! i no wer ur cumin from. i woz realy sad last yer and im not out of it yet but i think grd9 wil be better dan 8! whats ur passion? min was music so i started singin and electric gitar now. iv got a frend dat duz drums so we play 2gethor. find sumthin u realy luv and do it. u mite find a frend then, but having frends is realy important. ur at collage so theres gotta be a nis person there... try to move out if ur at ur parents. be nice call em evry week and maybe u can get on better terms. u can maybe contact that guy that gave u his address. c how that works. hope that helps.