Extreme self-hatred?

Question

So I was staring at the screen on Yahoo! Answers and I started wondering how I got to hating myself so much. Low self-esteem, self-loathing, whatever you call it I have it. It's the reason I self-injure (e.i. cut), it's the underlying feeling behind my eating disorder. The list could go on.

So why do people get so screwed as to start hating themselves? Do you think some people should? Or should even serial-killers learn to love themselves?(A valid question in my eyes because I doubt most serial killers love themselves, most of their actions seem to come from distorted internal pain) For those of you who believe in 'god' and his unconditional love, do you think we even have the right to hate ourselves if the almighty God can still love us? What's less redeemable, the complete rejection of self, or the actions (real or imagined) that led up to such malice? Because that's what it feels like, like I hate myself so much I want to be destroyed.

was The Doctor Of Stuff just too cranky to answer, or did the questions scare him. I honestly don't understand why you'd even bother commenting if you didn't want to answer.

Answer 1

normally self hatred comes from some underlying event, or situation that has taken place in your life. an abusive parent, being made fun of, being rejected. things like that. eating disorders and cutting, the combonation of the two, at least for me, came from severe depression, which was linked to an abusive relationship in which a drug addict ****** of a boyfriend beat me when he couldnt get his drugs..so i blamed myself and started hating who i was..you may have to go to a professional, if you are comfortable with medication, they can diagnose the problem, and treat it. good luck. and dont listen to mr go-to-a-coffeehouse..he probabaly cures his problems by being a weekend drunk, instead of asking for help or talking about it. good luck.

Answer 2

Wow girl what could a stranger here possible say to help you.................become whole, I know now that I'm facing the loss of a family member it has made me realize what a gift we have been given, I guess just understanding that you can learn to love yourself just as you've learned to hate yourself would be very powerful.

I remember hearing, "we are all the ages we've ever been". In other words the pain you learned as a child is still with you, but it can be unlearned, look up some people that can help, It's possible if you try, someone I know can help is called Dr. Luann Lindquist shes in San Diego look he up if you like or anyone qualified to help, I promise it's possible to get out of this cycle.

Answer 3

for one thing you get hating yourself cause of the low self esteem which comes from the way you look at yourself, and that comes from how you feel that others feel about you, and so forth, well yes god still loves you by the way, he did not mean for you to feel this way or have others judge you, and yes you can get to like , even love yourself, . As for the serieal killers well they like them self at least some of them do, and they enjoy the things that they do, while others of them do not. Your right the way that you look at yourself is behind a lot of your problems and you really need to figure out what they are and now you got where you got at this time. It may take a professional, but it will be well worth it. It will also help you to slow down and quiet the self injuries to yourself. Also they will help you get some healthy ways of copeing instead of the way that you are coping now, cause as you know that is not a healthy way of coping and you know by now that you need to cut more and more to get relief cause the relief has gotten shorter, and shorter as time has gone by. you really need to go and get some professional help and get your self esteem up, and change those neg thoughts about yourself to positive ones, I am not going to tell you that this is going to be easy, cause it is not , i have gone through this myself, and it is a hard road that you need to travel up to get to where you like, even love yourself, but it is well worth it, so please do not give up on yourself, cause it is a hard road, but well worth it, and you must keep telling yourself that you are as good as anyone else. Cause you are and you remember that. No one has the right to say any different, that is how you got that low self esteem in the first place, by the way you have been treated and the messages that you have gotten from many different people. So you take care of yourself and do not give up on yourself, and if you need to you get in touch with the crisis line or go to an er, or even call 911. It is the week end and i want you to stay safe. So Please stay safe and get into therapy, and work on your self esteem. Forget about the doctor of stuff, his answer up there is a bunch of s**t, don't take that, that is abuse.

Answer 4

Please, try to get some professional help as soon as possible in any way shape or form that is possible for you. Make sure it is someone that seems reliable, considerate, and knowledgeable in the areas in which you seem to be having trouble - priest, counselor, mental health worker, whomever.
There are a myriad of reasons why you are feeling and acting the way you do and I'm certainly not qualified to give you the answers.
From the way you have phrased and stated your question, you seem to be a very intelligent person. Sometimes higher intelligence can bring about more mental "confusion" (for lack of better words). You think more about things and more deeply.
Please try to talk to someone in person that you trust..please.

Answer 5

we learn to hate ourselves i think by how we get treated most of the time, especially in our childhood and teens. especially if it is by someone close to us. it is possible however to not hate oneself even if this happens because we just refuse to accept we are worthless.

hate can be turned around, eventhough it will take time just like it took time to hate yourself. love yourself and tell yourself that because you are the only one in yourself and no matter how many mistakes you made, you are still alive and worthy of the life you've been given. you owe it to yourself to love yourself with all the good and bad; humans, all famous, heros or not have good and bad.

start accepting you and loving you now because that is the only way and don't give up on you, ok? :)

Answer 6

People hate themselves from actions and also from chemical balance in their heads- I don't believe much in god or any consequences promised from religion so here's my views on it. self-hatred for stupid things like appearance or grades is just dumb. these things can be changed with time and are never permanent. So for me justification of self-hatred comes from the permanence of events. If you killed someone, then go ahead and hate yourself. you can't change it now. so as for what is less redeemable. it's the actions if you can't change them. if you can change them then it's the rejection of self. For me self-hatred occurs in people who can't follow this prayer "God grant me the serenity to accept the things I can not change, the strength to change the things I can and the wisdom to know the difference."

Answer 7

Serial killers don't know how to love others I don't know if its self hatred its a mental in balance in their brain. IF you hate yourself you need counseling and a hobby that makes you feel better about yourself.

Answer 8

Wow I can't really answer because I feel the same way you do. I've tried to change my life recently and reach out and do nice things for people but they just turn around and wipe their feet on me....makeing me hate myself even more. Good luck.

Answer 9

self hatred is eating me and my family alive. But the older I get, the less I see it getting fixed. Especially when those that "love you" may be half the problem with the way you feel about yourself.

Answer 10

Ya gotta Seek Professional Help NOW

Call NOW