how can i get help with something if i'm too scared to tell anyone i need help?

Question

i don't just mean about this one thing because it's embarassing, i mean i'm scared to talk to anyone about anything. even just talking to my mom on the phone makes me nervous because i might call the wrong number and have to talk to someone else for a minute. and if i go into a store i won't buy anything that's behind the counter (like types of candy or whatever) cause then i'd have to talk to the sales person and i don't want to do that. i usually can't even make appointments for things cause i have to talk to someone to do that, or email them, or something, and i can't make myself do it no matter how much i want to.

anyhow the problem is that i cut myself, and i know that that's bad and that i should stop, and i know that i should talk to a counselor or whatever, but i've been meaning to do that for like over a year and i haven't yet. so what do i do?

Answer 1

Take small steps toward your goal. Maybe do some research online first. You're not the first person with these challenges, right? So there are others, and they are out there. Find groups online and people online. You don't even have to email them. Just start reading, at first.

Don't try to do everything in one day, but just keep doing a little, most days. Maybe find a number to a counselor one day. Then decide what you want them to do. If you have anxieties or phobias - it sorta sounds like that - medication could be a huge help.

Learn to go easy on yourself & forgive yourself. Hey, if one day isn't a good day, just let it go, & know that there will be better days in the future.

I think cutting yourself could be because there is so much pain that it takes your mind off of the mental pain, if that makes sense. Like biting your tongue because your leg is broken. Well, if your leg is broken it still needs to be helped - biting your tongue is a distractor, but the basic issue still needs to be resolved.

There are also mental health organizations and social organizations. You are obviously computer savvy - look some up! They may be a way of getting started without making phone calls.

So keep taking small steps - hey, even posting here is a step! In the end you can reach your goal of talking to a counselor and getting some more help. Believe in yourself!

Answer 2

Hey o.k. everybody has something they're scared to tell it's human nature. The fact that you posted the question on here to me seems like you've taken the first step to getting help. I used to burn myself and it was because I was angry and felt I'd rather hurt myself than what I might do to someone else if I went off on'em. It started over a girl I was crazy about and a guy I thought was my friend. Finally I realized it just wasn't what I wanted to do anymore and that they deserved each other. Once I lost the anger I didn't want to hurt myself anymore. But what works for one might not work for all and what I suggest that you do is go talk to your mom. She's the one who gave birth to you and I'd say she doesn't want to see you hurt. You've already told your secret so now all you have to do is get help to deal w/things. No sweat! I hope you get help and know that you're not alone!

Answer 3

It is often difficult to talk directly with someone about our problems because we fear their reaction. By now you can see that the vast majority of people want to help when they hear your problem. This first step might help you believe that there are people around you that might wish to help as well.

Fear of talking with others may come from a traumatic episode in your past when someone reacted badly to something you told them. While it has left you with emotional scars their reaction was really a sign of their own sickness not a natural reaction to whatever you told them.

It seems that you do have a problem with harming yourself but that may not be the real problem. Do you know consciously why you fear to interact with others? Discussing the reasons even here in this anonymous forum might help get you started.

Remember most people really want to help.

Answer 4

You obviously find communicating online much easier than face-to-face conversation. Why not try joining a Yahoo group where you'll meet people who can identify with you (as I can) - especially on the self-cutting side of things. One group I'd recommend is listed below. Hopefully this will be a first step to getting the help you need.

Answer 5

You've got to trust somebody. You're all caught up in your trip. Try a 12 step meeting. You can just listen until you feel like there is someone there you can trust. They have meetings for codependency, adult children of alcholics, those might be a good start. Search yahoo with some keywords and see what's in your neighborhood. Or you could go to your doctor and ask to see a psychologist or psychiatrist.

Answer 6

The first part sounds like anxiety disorder or social phobia. I certainly have heard of instances of people cutting themselves to get rid of anxiety, but if you can take the first step and go to a doctor and tell him of this anxiety he/she might be able to help. There are medications available to control anxiety disorders, like clonazepam for instance. If you can have somebody come with you to the doctors office, maybe you would feel less anxious.

Answer 7

You have spoken out here. Do it again for these other issues. You are by no means alone in these types of things. There are more people afflicted with similar fears about many things than any of us will ever know. You have had the courage to try to find help. do it again. No one is going to fault you for what you have done. They will be wiling to reach out to help you. People, the doctors and nurses, and ministers are compassionate people. They cry within themselves when people are hurting. You do want help, help them to be happy by going to them and asking them what they think. Perhaps you might even be able to help them in some way. Seeking their help is one way for you to help them. Please go to them so that you can help them to not be sad for people who are in need of help.

Answer 8

make a choice. Decide you don't want to live like this anymore and do what ever you have to. You can overcome it. But you have to be committed to your own well being. Choose to be better. Or don't choose to be better and live with it forever. Hard work...but a the pay off is immeasurable. Just decide.

Answer 9

Please, for yourself, talk to someone.

Stop telling yourself you'll do it later, because you keep lying to yourself, and you know it. Do it now or at the next possible moment.

The sooner the better. I wish you the best of luck. May you find the strength to do tell someone.

Answer 10

maybe you can get someone you know and trust to help you make your first appointments. I made my husbands apointments and even went to his therapy sessons at first, until he began to feel more comfortable.