this guy and i were together a while ago and we broke up...since then i've decided i don't just wanna have sex until i'm married..i already have a daughter and i don't wanna risk having another child and not being married....he is always begging me...his friends make fun of me bc of it...and the more they talk about it the more he pisses me off! i told him about this when we first got back together...so am i mean or is he the ***?
2007-01-19 16:05:46 · 12 answers · asked by tikidae25 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
this behavior is inappropriate and harmful. it is great that you are showing your daughter that you can learn from mistakes (the act not the child) and that you can choose to start over. i commend you for your maturity and parenting, good job. your bf however is showing signs of wanting to dominate the situation which is confounded by him calling in the troops. his friends wouldnt make fun of him if he wasnt out complaining about it because they wouldnt know. do not let him force or pressure you into sex. this isnt good for you because this type of thing usually turns into date rape and/or abuse. if he wants a girl that puts out send him on down the road and tell him that you want to set a better example for your child.
a lot of men would understand and would be happy to wait.
2007-01-19 16:24:31 · answer #1 · answered by painfully yours 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think you are wise to realize that a man can - and often does - just get up and walk out when a woman says....I'm gonna have a baby.
He probably would not pay child support unless you took him to court and won.
And another thing - how does his friends (how many?) know you are not having sex with him? Obviously, he told them. But if he told this on you, what else is he telling them about you?
Bottom line is this: Its your body, and its your life. You should make the deicisons, and live with what you decide.
When my step-daughter (I hate that term) was going to marry her 1st husband, it seemed like everyone was telling her she needed to stay married. The night before her wedding, she asked me if I had any comments. I had been her step-father for about 18 months. Since she asked me, I asked her: Who is the most important person in your life? Who can you trust to always be there for you?
She froze - as she thought about her pending husband and her Mom (who was, and still is her closest friend). And I think she also wondered if I was asking her to pick between her Father and me. She finally said she didn't know.
I took her and her Mother into the bathroom and pointed at the mirror. Told her to stand in front of the mirror: That is the only person you can trust to be with you always. Sooner or later, your Mom and I will not be around (either not there or dead). So stand up for yourself, and don't take any **** from anybody.
She doesn't take too much s***. She is now on her 3rd husband. Probably 3 months after her 1st marriage, her husband (just like his father) started messing around while she was attending night classes.
Take care.
2007-01-19 16:22:18 · answer #2 · answered by John Hightower 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You have every right to make and follow any decisions about your sex life. It should respected by others. If his friends make fun of you it is because he discusses your sexual activity or lack of it with his friends. This should be a private thing with you and anyone you choose to date.The guy sounds very insensitive and immature. You owe it to yourself and your daughter to find someone who will respect and honor you both. Move on this guy is bad news. Good luck.
2007-01-19 16:14:01 · answer #3 · answered by mother of Bridezilla 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
hi there move on with your life u do not need anyone making fun of u you do what u think is right for u and your daughter do not let anyone tell u different if he really loves u he'll do what u say and wait but if he does not then girl he is not worth it any men that loves a women waits no matter how long it takes even if he has to j---- himself . your right 100% but it's your choice, chow
2007-01-19 16:13:17 · answer #4 · answered by sugarlove_one 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
His is SO wrong. he doesn't respect your wishes, which are really understandable. don't set a bad example for your kids and let the guy know that you are firm in your decision. if he leaves you for another women just because you won't have sex, then you will see his real character....
2007-01-19 16:15:23 · answer #5 · answered by Megan C 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You don't want to have sex. Period, end of story. If he's okay with that, then fine. And honestly, he should defend you to his friends but he's not. He's not being respectful of your decision.
You need to dump him and find someone who will understand and respect your wishes.
2007-01-19 16:17:43 · answer #6 · answered by Shrieking Panda 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
drop the loser - sex isnt everything - if he loved you, he'd stop pressuring you - since he's pressuring you and having his friends make fun of you, he obviously doenst love you - so why would you want him around anyway?
2007-01-19 16:12:28 · answer #7 · answered by mikowensmom 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think your wrong because your taking something away he got adapted to. sex is a mutual thing and your hurting him physically, emotionally and socially. protect your self if you dont want more kids but dont stop feeding him.
2007-01-19 16:14:00 · answer #8 · answered by Lost Drifter 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
u are in the right. find your self plus go and seek god. you can become a born again virgin. give yourself to jesus christ. he gave himself up for you. something to think about. would you give up your daughter if she could be the savior of the world????? god did!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! he gave up his ONLY son to save you,your parents, your daughter, your boyfriend, anybody you can think of jesus can and will save them if they ask for salvation.
2007-01-19 16:14:01 · answer #9 · answered by greg j 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
no means no, don't let him pressure you. you've made a decision and need to stick by it and he should respect your decision to not have sex.
2007-01-19 16:09:37 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋