Upon reading this, I am aware that all of you will bash me and hope for my worst death. That is fine.
When I was about 14, some days we had friends over. One girl, who was a few years younger than me. As a prank, I gave her small wedgies or poke her butt.
Now, there was no "fingering" or "penetration" involved. I didn't strip down, nor did she. I didn't flash my genitals at her, nor did I feel her private area. I didn't get any sort of orgasm or anything like that.
Also I am (and please I am serious) someone who is afraid/uncomfortable at viewing porn. When a friend has found a porn email/site and wants to look at it, I instantly look away or refuse to talk about it. I have never viewed any kind of porn (including today, a college student).
The girl from what I hear/see, is perfectly fine. She still comes with other people, laughs etc. However I have immense guilt about it, and worry that I will be labeled as a sex offender.
So tell me, am I a disgusting pervert who should die?
2007-01-19 15:24:38 · 27 answers · asked by Anonymous in Society & Culture ➔ Etiquette
I am adding that I haven't seen anyone. I have done research on molestation/abuse and seen the horrendous consequences for it
Please do answer. I cannot take this guilt anymore.
2007-01-19 15:25:55 · update #1
nah! you were just being a normal adolescent brat!!! LOL we've all been there!!
2007-01-19 15:33:18 · answer #1 · answered by countryladyfromNC 3 · 3⤊ 0⤋
No, That doesn't make you a molester. Why would you think that? If it bothers you that much, you need to talk to her. If she's not uncomfortable around you then she's ok. You need to come to turns with the you're not a molester. You were mean when you were 14. I had alot of guy friends do that to me when I was around that age. I just thought the were azzholes at time. I didn;t read nothing else into it.
But I understand where you coming from because its some sick people out there in the world. What is wrong is that you've been punishing yourself for years over a childhood prank. AND No it doesn't make you a pervert.
Look at the news and read online articles about child molesters. Those are the people who are disgusting perverts that should die horrible deaths.
2007-01-19 23:36:51 · answer #2 · answered by gloried 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
No, you're not a disgusting pervert who should die.
Since you still see her, why not start a conversation with her and refer to the times when you were all silly kids and the antics you played on each other.
You could look at her and say, "if I ever did anything to offend you - I'm sorry".
That may clear the air for you, especially when she may not even recall this event or she may just laugh it off and tell you to not give it a second thought.
Regarding today and your inability to view porn. This could be some psychological block. If you had parents that deemed this as bad or dirty, that may be one reason. I wouldn't worry about it for now. In time, when you're comfortable, you'll explore and decide what you're comfortable with. I personally don't get much from porn - I prefer live interaction. That may be the case for you.
2007-01-19 23:50:09 · answer #3 · answered by ☼High☼Voltage☼Blonde☼ 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think you're obsessing over the attention sex crimes are receiving, and that there might be a bit of paranoia coupled with genuine concern.
What happened was not sexual in nature as you described it, which in turn shows that you did not molest or harm the person. The fact that you feel guilty about it also shows that it was innocent fun as a kid, not as a predator.
The not viewing porn issue seems to be a vigilant form of abstinence. If sex repulses you, I would seek professional advice to determine if there is anything wrong, and if so, what to do to alleviate the situation.
Hope things work out.
2007-01-19 23:37:04 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
As a person who is very strongly against child molesters and wish the worst upon them ,Your story just made me think of other teenage boy pranks like flipping girls bras and other things that boys
do to just joke around , And Porn makes lots of people uncomfortable so relax your normal and not a child molester.
2007-01-20 18:20:09 · answer #5 · answered by Tara 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Wow, man, you are WAY overreacting. If you're so freaked out that the girl still is mad at you about that ask her because I do not think that is the case. You need to relax and take a breather. Don't let this one little incident in your life ruin your relationships and love life. Trust me, I'm around girls all the time and most of them, as long as your friends with them, don't really give a darn if you poke them in the butt. And, on top of all that, to answer your final question, since you have never looked at porn I would say you are in no way a disgusting pervert. Maybe you SHOULD look at porn, it would make you a little more normal.
2007-01-19 23:32:33 · answer #6 · answered by The FudgeMaster 2 · 2⤊ 2⤋
No, this does not make you a molester. It was just a prank, with no sexual intentions and no serious consequences. You were just an immature kid pulling a prank on another kid. You do not sound like a pervert or a molester.
2007-01-20 06:44:12 · answer #7 · answered by undir 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You were 14. Please stop torturing yourself! You obviously have a conscience, which is what TRUE molesters lack.
Also, it is not unusal to be repulsed by porn. Most well adjusted people ARE.
What you DO need to talk to a professional about is the years you've spent in self hatred because of one (innocent) incident. You sound like a very decent, moral person who wants to do the right thing, and right now, the right thing would be for you to get better.
I wish you peace of mind.
2007-01-19 23:55:54 · answer #8 · answered by LolaCorolla 7 · 2⤊ 1⤋
To me it doesn't sound like you did anything wrong. Since you are obviously feeling some guilt from this maybe you mention these events to her, asking her if she remembers the time when this happened. Observe how she responds and then decide if what you did is a terrible thing or not. I'm thinking not.
2007-01-19 23:33:07 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
no you are not in my opoin a molester. i think you did what normal 14 year old boys do. when i was 11 a 13 year old pinched my butt and i did not even rember it till now so no you are no monster. so don't beat yourself up. if you still talk to the girl you could always say sorry for doing it i would think it was so great if a guy said sorry for pokeing my butt .
well take care
2007-01-19 23:36:29 · answer #10 · answered by ~*big mama *~ 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Sounds like you were just playing a prank. The girl is OK, so she feels the same way. Best of all you not not to mess with people and you wont do it again.
Leave it be a move forward. And keep avoiding porn. Its garbage.
2007-01-19 23:35:01 · answer #11 · answered by ? 5 · 3⤊ 1⤋