My Mom is like a monster, you're not so typical monster. I need your help.?

Question

It's as if she doesn't want me to have friends. She doesn't want me to trust them. TRUST is the best, biggest part of FRIENDSHIP. You know what, I'll be honest here, when I was young/younger, I didn't have friends, I've never been close to anyone.. I grew up alone and sad. Now, 13 years later, here I am a new exchange student and I met my best friend. She told me not to trust her... All friends are enemies. I mean it's part of life righ/

Second thing, I am a writer. i write shprt sotories but I don't feel like showing it to mom or anyone else but the school newspaper.. She read my writings and said that they were too Americanized (she's spanish)and violating God's laws. For God's sake, it's just one of my fictitious writings!! She thought it sucked but it got published in our School paper.

Third, she loves to contradict herself. Like say for example, she'll say that we're not supposed to have guys enter the house, or let alone, girls. Then when my classm8s came, she says it's ok

About the contradicting thing, she always does that.. Me and my sister get really pissed off. The thing I hate the most, is she doesn't want me to have friends. When you ask her a question, she is always mad.

Answer 1

Moms will be moms, is all I can say. I know you love her, but you may have to just love her, warts and all. Now that you are older, try to grow a second skin and just let her say it and then mentally, let it go. Do your own thing . . .. yeah, she'll have something to say about it, but she'll probably always be like that. It won't be too long before she realizes you have grown up and hopefully, she will look at your actions in a different light. I know she is proud of you despite how she sometimes acts.

Answer 2

Start by demanding his respect. Don't make him breakfast. Tell him your sleep is important too- and you have to work all day as well. He may go to a job, but you work all day with no pay and no thank you. He can make his own breakfast, and you expect the dishes from it to be done before you get up. Put some effort into your appearance. It's not about your hair. Put on a little makeup and put on decent clothes. Jeans are fine, but something more than a t-shirt. Tell him you are his wife. You are not a slave, or a servant. You have a choice, and will not continue to be treated poorly and be at his beck and call. Cut off all sex. Remind him that sex for a woman starts outside the bedroom. You are too tired from taking care of your children and the family's home to pleasure a man who treats you like a servant. If he wants sex, he has to step up and do some chores and show you respect and real affection. I'd suggest having a girl's night with friends. He can stay home and watch the children by himself for a few hours. Then, he can understand how difficult it is! But your problem is self esteem. You are worth more than what he gives you. If you refuse to see it, things will never get better.

Answer 3

It sounds like you need a stable adult in your life to help you sort through the things to trust or not trust.

Is there an aunt or grandmother, teacher or youth leader who doesn't try to control you so much?

Please understand, the purpose of this adult in your life is NOT to act against your mother -- but to help you keep your head on straight while you figure out how to show your mother respect while you learn to live your own life.

This is more complicated than one answer from a group of strangers can offer.

I had a woman in my life that I think saved my life. For me, it was my dad who was selfish and unreliable... my mom was so busy keeping dad from going off the deep end that she failed to notice that her kids were drowning too. I turned to our pastor's wife for understanding and wisdom. She gave me those and so much more.

Best wishes to you, and keep writing.

Answer 4

My mom wanted me to never feel the hurt of putting trust in someone, and getting disappointed.
When you trust people, you are open to hurt, it's why you must be careful who you call freinds.

She needs to know you wont leave what you have been taught to know is important in your family.

Freinds are great, but family is always. My mom became the best freind and the most fun, after I got older.

She was my mom first, freind when I got much older.

I miss her.....

Answer 5

sounds like your mom has trust issues herself and is trying to keep you from having the issues she has. however, her actions are just the opposite of her intentions. my mom is the same way, but when it comes to my friends and my interests, unfortunately i dont include her because i don't need that type of negativity in my life. when you are able to think for yourself and show her that you CAN trust your friends and that you write great short stories, she will either learn that she was wrong or completely back off. continue to live for yourself and dont worry about what your mom thinks of how you are living your life. it's ur life, so live it.

Answer 6

R u still living at home dont u think u should have your own place that way u dont have to be in each others faces.

Answer 7

Sounds like she is trying to make your life as miserable as possible. The sooner you get out from under her roof, the better. Please don't let her control your life or she will as long as she is living. This comes from experience.

Answer 8

SOUNDS LIKE MY MOTHER.DON'T LISTEN TO HER BECAUSE AT THE END YOU WILL HAVE NO FRIENDS.I STARTED COUNSELING BECAUSE OF THAT ,I CAN'T TRUST ANYONE, I DON'T HAVE ANY FRIENDS AND THAT IS KILLING ME.

Answer 9

They **** us up. Its a book, read it