Calling out ALL MOMS!! I am a first time single mom of a 2 year old and i have trouble discplining him. HELP!?

Question

My son is a sweet heart for the most part, but some times he can turn into an EXTREMELY bratty little tyrant. I know that 2 yr olds all act this way sometimes, but i think he is more of an extreme case. There is no talking to him when he is mad, he throws everything in sight, screams at the top of his lungs, and does not listen to a word i say. Ive tried time outs, ignoring him, getting on his level and talking to him, and nothing seems to work! I am 21, his daddy passed away almost a year ago, and i live with my mom and sister. The only time he seems to listen is when a male tells him what to do.. HELP!! any and all tips will be appreciated!

well, that is what i have noticed. when me, my mom, or sister try to discipline him, he will not listen. but if my sister's boyfriend or another male family member tells him, he will do it right away.. i have tried time outs, he will not stay put..

Answer 1

i'm sorry for you and your son's loss. my best advice would be not to try and talk to him when he's upset. wait for him to calm down and then try to talk about it. if he becomes upset, stop the discussion and try again when he's calm. it's hard enough to get a 2 year old to listen as it is, without combating all of the emotions they don't understand how to deal with. try talking to him and ask him how's he's feeling and give him a choice of words to use, such as angry or sad. if he's angry then give him options on how to better deal with that than screaming or throwing things. if he's receptive to that, then ask him to help you pick up the things he's thrown. be consistant and patient. you both have been through a terrible time. even though he was a baby and might not remember, he does know of your sadness and loss. but he does not know at his age how to express this. it's up to you to teac him how to properly deal with these extreme emotions and get him to talk to you about them. let him know how you feel when he acts this way. as for the responding to men, either it's because some children just respond better to a male voice better, or if they aren't around them as much as you, your mother and sister, he might just be more inclined to listen to them. this might be because he knows what he's been able to get away with with you guys, and is not as likely to test a stranger or someone he's not as familiar with. good luck, and just be patient and consistant. 2 year olds have all of these feelings and emotions and they have no idea what to do with them.



autumn, you're not violent? you throw water in your child's face???? you need a new ped, and some parenting classes. i'm sorry but throwing water in anyone's face, is about as disrespectful as you can get. i would not tolerate this behavior from anyone, child or adult. but especially the adult.

Answer 2

Male or female doesn't matter. A male is just stronger voiced and stands more secure. Stop babying him. He's a boy. Treat him as a boy. Take your stand. Be firm. First teach him what STOP means in every sense of the word. When he is throwing things, yell stop. If he is sassing, yell stop. Always give a reason why. If you can't give a good reason then don't say it. And I mean a GOOD reason. "Just because" is NOT a GOOD reason. If he wants to throw things, take away whatever he is throwing. When he's good let him take something back one at a time. And a simple smack on the backside won't kill him. You either want him to be a boy growing into a man or you want a petunia. Talking to him will get you nowhere. Put some fear into him and keep the upper hand. Try a wooden spoon. At this age it won't hurt cause of the diaper. Get him twice on the butt when he acts up. It only take a few times. Then all you have to do is show it to him and he will stop. Worked for my kids. And my grandkids. And let me tell you. My g-kids are wild. Not at my house though. And I hardly ever connect with them and the spoon. But just show it to them? They scatter and sit quiet. Good luck. You'll look back on these years fondly. Trust me. 2 is a blast.

Answer 3

I have 3 boys. My 2 1/2 yr. old son would do the same thing to me. He listens to his father though. I realized after it being pointed out to me, that usually, I would give in. You have to change your tone, do not scream, but, be serious. Put the book away somewhere for one. And, make sure all of his favorite toys are up, sit him in his room on the bed, tell him what the problem is. Get up, walk out of the room, and shut the door. You have to let him know that you are the decision maker, not him. Let him scream, so what. Ignore him, walk away. It will stop.

Answer 4

Need advice? I may not be able to help you on this one but I started chatting in a pregnancy room when I first found out I was pregnant and for 4 years now I've continued to go into that room. Of course ive had my daughter since then but I've made great friends in there who were also pregnant when they first started chatting in the room and now are dealing with toddlers and children. Any advice you need you can get in there. I guarentee it. If you have time to chat you should check it out. its Pregnancy:3 under health and wellness in yahoo chat rooms. My SN is Ashes and I would love to see you come in there. It also keeps parents sane knowing they are not the only ones going through the same stage. Feel free to IM me if you need better directions. aj_55_zen

Answer 5

Unfortunately, it's not easy being a single mom. I was a single mom for 9 yrs. If you're having this much trouble, I would talk to your pediatrician and ask what he/she advises. The only thing I can say other wise is be consistent. When you time out a child you use his age for a time limit. So he is 2, only time him out for 2 minutes. Don't talk to him when you're doing it. If you have to hold him there firmly so he knows you mean business. You may want to talk to a child Psychiatrist. Good Luck

Answer 6

Please buy this book "1,2,3 Magic" by Dr. Thomas Phelan. It's a thin book, a quick read and will make your life with kids a pleasure.

Read the reviews from other parents that bought this book from amazon.com. Here's the link for the book:
http://www.amazon.com/1-2-3-Magic-Effective-Discipline-Children/dp/1889140163/sr=8-1/qid=1169260621/ref=pd_bbs_sr_1/103-2833085-6521401?ie=UTF8&s=books

You can buy it at most book stores, but I wanted you to see what other families that bought the book think of it!

Best of luck, you can do it! Your son will be acting like a little gentleman for you in no time!!

Answer 7

Get it out of your head that he only responds to males.

He is probably so mad because he doesn't have the words he needs to express his frustration. Read to him a lot, teach him words, and talk to him when he gets mad. If he won't listen, put him in time out, then talk to him when he's quiet.

Also make sure he's getting regular naps, not drinking caffeine and sleeping well at night.

Answer 8

I taught my son sign languga eat ayoung age it has really helped he can tell me when he is angry frustrated sad needs help is hurt so if your son does not speak too much it might be useful to teach him some signs .Focus on emotions at first Here is a web site that might help if you want to teach it to him www.signingtime.com.they also have public broadcast of the pogram. In addition consistency is key do not bend stand firm. 2 min (1 min for every year of his age )They don't retain it for much longer then that. explain why he is in time out what you expect of him . hope this helps worked for me

Answer 9

i replace into 19 yrs previous once I had my son. have been with the dad because of the fact i replace into sixteen, yet by the time i replace into around 6 months pregnant he left me. Didnt choose a single element to do together with his toddler. It took me awhile to discover somebody lower back. don't get me incorrect I had boyfriends on and rancid that enjoyed my newborn purely as lots if no extra suitable than they cared approximately/enjoyed me. i'm now 25 yrs previous, have been married for a year to the main astounding guy. I met him while my son replace into 18 months previous. And immediately we are awaiting our 2d newborn mutually. you will discover somebody. It purely takes time. many times once you end finding, they discover you :)

Answer 10

ummm....spanking comes to mind! I would tan my daughter's hide if she started screaming and throwing things! The same way I would smack a stranger doing the same thing in my home! Also my pediatrician reccommended using a cup of water that I throw in her face when she does this, as an alternative to spanking. It worked at first because of the shock value. Also I would bring the same cup i used for that at home and keep it in my purse and take it out in public when she misbehaved, just the threat was enough to get her to calm down! Whatever works right?