why did the pervert cross the road??????

Question

cos he couldnt get is dxxk out of the chicken

Answer 1

Just another animal related joke i hope you font mind me adding


A woman goes into a pet shop looking for a parrot. The assistant shows her a beautiful African Grey parrot. "What about this one, Madam? A beautiful bird, I'm sure you'll agree, and it's an absolute steal at only £20."

"Why is it that cheap?" the woman asks.

"Well," replies the assistant, "it used to live in a brothel and as a result its language is a touch obscene."

"Oh, I don't mind that," said the woman, making her mind up, "I'm broad minded and it'll be a laugh having a profane parrot".

So saying, she buys the parrot and takes him home. Once safely in his new home, the parrot looks around and squawks at the woman "**** me, a ******* new brothel and a ******* new madam."

"I'm not a madam and this isn't a brothel," says the woman indignantly, but she sees the funny side and let's it drop.

A little later the woman's two teenage daughters arrive home. "A new brothel, a new madam, and now new ******* prostitutes" says the parrot when he sees the daughters.

"Mum, tell your parrot to shut-up, we're not prostitutes" complain the girls, but they all see the funny side and have at laugh at their filthy new pet.

A short while later, the woman's husband comes home.

"Well **** me, a new brothel, a new madam, new ******* whores, but the same old clients. How ya doin', Dave?" says the parrot.


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Two Irishmen walk into a pet shop in Dingle. They head to the bird section
and Gerry says to Paddy, "Dat's dem."

The owner comes over and asks if he can help them. "Yeah, we'll take four of
dem dere little budgies in dat cage up dere," says Gerry.

The owner puts the budgies in a cardboard box. Paddy and Gerry pay for the
birds, leaves the shop and get into Gerry's truck to drive to the top of the Conner Pass.

At the Connor Pass, Gerry looks down at the 1000 foot drop and says, "Dis
looks like a grand place." He takes two birds out of the box, puts one on
each shoulder and jumps off the cliff.

Paddy watches as the budgies fly off and Gerry falls all the way to the
bottom, killing himself stone dead.

Looking down at the remains of his best pal, Paddy shakes his head and says,

"Fook dat. Dis budgie jumping is too fook'n dangerous for me!"

THERE'S MORE:-

Moments later, Seamus arrives up at Connor Pass. He's been to the pet shop
too and walks up to the edge of the cliff carrying another cardboard box in
one hand and a shotgun in the other.

"Hi Paddy, watch dis" Seamus says. He takes a parrot from the box and lets
him fly free. He then throws himself over the edge of the cliff with the
gun. Paddy watches as halfway down, Seamus takes the gun and shoots the parrot.

Seamus continues to plummet down and down until he hits the bottom and
breaks every bone in his body. Paddy shakes his head and says, "And I'm
never trying dat parrotshotting either!". Always good for a laugh

ITS NOT OVER YET (even though you wish it was)


Paddy is just getting over the shock of losing two friends when Sean
appears. He's also been to the pet shop and is carrying a cardboard box out
of which he pulls a chicken.

Sean then takes the chicken by its legs and hurls himself off the cliff and
disappears down and down until he hits a rock and breaks his spine.

Once more Paddy shakes his head. "Fook dat, lads. First dere was Gerry with
his budgie jumping, den Seamus parrotshooting...and now Sean and his fook'n
hengliding!"

Answer 2

Was it a chicken run ?
Or was he just chasing a bird ?

Answer 3

poor chicken

Answer 4

sorry I starred this joke, the star was actually for astratwin's joke which I thought was hilarious.

Answer 5

took me a few seconds but i got it

Answer 6

Mmm chicken. :D

Answer 7

>

Answer 8

Hahaha!!!!!

Answer 9

sick but made me chuckle bro

Answer 10

hahahaha, thats good!