I'v been talking to this guy for 6 month, we see each other all the time, last night we came close to having sex, but he stoped it.....
he said he didnt want to mess up what we have, i asked what do we have,he said he'll tell me later.. i don't want to wait, i like this guy so much.. i have never told him how much i like him, but am sure he knows, well he knows he's the only guy i want, he knows how bad i want him, i tell him all the time. some one out there help me, i'm so confused....
2007-01-19 07:54:12 · 28 answers · asked by hell f 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Well since I don't know either of you I can only share my opinion. If a guy refuses to take it one step further it could mean he has you on the side or he doesn't want to lose your friendship by going further with you. My boyfriend is a better judge of character of males than I am so when he gets home I will ask him his opinion of your situation. If he is religious that is what might be stopping him. If he is not religious than might have another one on the side and don't want to tell you about her. Because once you have sex with males, guys think you are out for a commitment.
2007-01-19 08:05:25 · answer #1 · answered by already_enuff_spice_in_this 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Wait!
You don't even have a commitment, yet.
You said that you have not talked about how much you like him, but he knows.
Maybe he wants to talk more.
Maybe he likes what you have as very close friends, and does not want to destroy that with a moment of instant gratification: sex.
Maybe he wants to wait or at least take things slowly.
Some people wait years.
This does not mean he is gay or that he does not like you.
THere is much more to you than sex.
Just because a man or boy does not respond sexually, as you would like him to, does not make you ugly or any less of a person or even less important to him.
In fact, he does not want to just have sex with you and then see where things go.
He has put his own desires on hold.
This is actually an honorable guy.
Find other things to do besides sex.
That will only strengthen your relationship.
I know that part of you feels rejected.
But, don't. He does probably want to have sex with you.
He is just showing a bit of restraint.
And, when it does happen, you will feel better because you will know that he does not just have sex with "anybody" he waits for that "very special girl" and it is "you."
If you think that you are going to continue to want sex, even when he does not, then don't put yourself in situations where you are both alone for long periods of time.
He just might be woorth waiting for.
Now, you have to be careful.
You don't want to look like you are just wanting him for sex.
that is not attractive for a guy or girl.
So, do other things, find other activities.
Wait until he makes a commitment to you.
I mean a strong commitment, not a vague one.
It will come.
Just be patient.
And, it will be worth it.
Especially if he is a virgin and has waited for that one and only woman, you.
2007-01-19 08:10:08 · answer #2 · answered by JAN W 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I don't know how many guys you've had sex with, but most girls value sex in a different way than guys do. Normally, its the other way around than the way you feel.
Maybe he has morals, and doesn't want to hurt you or get you pregnant. I respect him for doing that. Perhaps he's not the right one for you if you can't respect his beliefs.
I'm personally saving my virginity until marriage. Maybe he's trying to do the same. Try not to force him into it.
Girl...sex is strong. Don't be so determined to get it. Save it for who you marry. The reason you are confused is because your image of sex is distorted. You think that sex = love, when in reality, in Gods eyes, sex is only love when it is in marriage. He can show love in other ways, and if another way is by protecting you by not having sex, then so be it.
I hope I helped.
BTW..how old are you anyways?
2007-01-19 08:02:48 · answer #3 · answered by morethanitseems 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He's obviously attracted to you to some extent. And he may very well be attached to you but is afraid that if he gets too intimate it might ruin the good vein the relationship is currently in. This tends to happen with guys that have been hurt before. He may feel sex is a committing factor.
I know that both I and my fiance easily got very attached to people after sex before we met. Maybe he is the same and doesn't want to risk getting hurt.
2007-01-19 08:01:10 · answer #4 · answered by jetkitty83 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
MAYBE just MAYBE he Loves and Resects you and HIMSELF and would like to keep things on a level that is NOT sexual in case you break up?? As there is TO MUCH easy sex now days, and the draw backs that go WITH that.....not wanting to be a parent right now, STD's(everyone each of you AND your partners AND theirs you ALSO are connected with! NOT SAFE..old fashioned BUT TRUE!!!!)morals, beliefs, ASK him!!!!
100% Communication IS the root of HAPPY ~ LONG LASTING relationships!!!!
Good Luck..and MUCH Happiness!!!!
2007-01-19 08:03:24 · answer #5 · answered by Granna 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I have run across this syndrome before. I knew a girl who was so beautiful I would have dragged my balls through 10 miles of broken glass just to jack off in her shadow. Her husband wouldn't touch her. She ended up getting knocked up by some other guy and divorced. What that has to do with this. Absolutely nothing.
Maybe he geniunely respects you. Give him some time.
2007-01-19 07:58:21 · answer #6 · answered by trichbopper 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You should be happy. He respects you. Most guys would have been trying to get you in the sack after a few days. He's just a good guy. Be happy because there aren't to many of them out there any more.
2007-01-19 07:58:53 · answer #7 · answered by Lin_Z 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
respect his decision. it sounds like he truly cares for you, and sex can complicate things and he doesn't want to ruin it.
maybe he is waiting for marriage but doesn't know to say it? you said ".. i have never told him how much i like him", could that be a reason too? you know a lot of men don't know these things unless you tell them bluntly.
he does like you. that's all you should worry about. finding a man who doesn't want to just use you can be very hard. so consider yourself lucky.
this desire you have for him will make it so much more better when it does happen. so be patient!
2007-01-19 08:01:27 · answer #8 · answered by NAQ 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Stop!! Breathe here for a minute or ninety okay? Two things come to mind here. 1-He's thinking this relationship may turn into marriage, and he's waiting because of a personal religious conviction. 2-Something else(very scary here to think about it if YOU think about it too) is running through his head. Something involving control, violence or even something more risque' than what I want to even write down here. Get him to tell you and fast. Otherwise, you may not be happy about how things turn out down the road!!
2007-01-19 08:01:19 · answer #9 · answered by mangamaniaciam 5 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Well the guy is throwing out some strange signals. He is obviously avoiding answering questions and having sex which basically means he isnt into you...or he's a game player. Dump him!
2007-01-19 07:57:50 · answer #10 · answered by jim 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋