My daughter had a baby dec20 4mn early ,she is only 15 She passed away jan1st.Her name was kayden,my ex is telling me I need to get her back to school.she dosnt need to be laying around the house all day.I think she needs more time, she just lost her child ,he says she didnt know her child , kayden was with us for 13days. not to mention she is a child herself.she has beenthrough alot.needing help here!!!!
2007-01-19 06:32:10 · 7 answers · asked by tina r 1 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Other - Pregnancy & Parenting
I would suggest grief counseling for your daughter. There are many options out there that don't cost so much, but beware that they are licensed. She can't withdraw from society and she no doubt needs to finish school. Maybe meeting w/ someone who is equiped w/ the knowledge to help her move through this experience can help her get back to life and adjust to the loss. You can never get over something like that completely, but at least she will be able to live with it.
2007-01-19 06:37:56 · answer #1 · answered by blue guru 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
My God, this is really depressing and I am 23years. I am 24weeks preg and I know if I experienced this loss I would be devastated regardless of how long I knew my baby. She definitely needs more time to recover but don't let her feel alone in this loss let her know you are there for her and willing to help her through. However you must let her know that her education is important so the next time (hopefully not soon) she will be in a better position to take care of her baby. Your ex can never relate to this loss as a woman can because even though the baby was only 13days, your daughter carried this child for five months and that is a long time to become acquainted. It is not easy to loose part of you. With your support she will definitely come through. some time in the future she will get over this loss, give her the time she needs. Good Luck!
2007-01-19 06:43:50 · answer #2 · answered by redz 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If it were me I would go to the school and get her work from her teachers, and have her start to do the work to get herself caught up. Try to get her some counseling perhaps the pastor at your church or at the local mental health center. While it is true that laying around the house probably isnt good for her it is good that she get her grieving done now because if not now then she will have to deal with it later. She is probably going through a lot of emotions from several sources, her hormones still have not settled down from the birth, the death of a child is crushing emotionally, guilt(every one feels it whether justified or not), and some stress from the family worrying about her. If possible to keep her in school and meet her needs she could be home schooled until fall at which time she should be ready to go back to a more normal life. Please give her time to grieve -- its really important to do that when it is time too. To you she is a 15 year old to her shes a mom with no baby to love!!!
2007-01-19 06:46:20 · answer #3 · answered by elaeblue 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
First of all, I am sorry for your loss.
I think you should get her some counseling. Being that young and having something tramatic happening like that will weigh heavily on her. Definatly get some help and ease her back into school. Maybe look into home schooling for a while until she feels comfortable going back and facing all of her friends and teachers. They will want to console her but it might not be time for that. Everyone handles situations like that different, and sometimes her friends at that age will not know how to treat her and will say the wrong things. Encourage her to get back into the groove, but do not force her. She will eventually come to grasp with what happened and the shock will dissapear but it is still really important to not let her block everyone and everything out. She will need her time but it shouldn't get to an unhealthy point. Just watch out for her and let her know she is loved and try to get her some professional help to help her cope with the loss. Once again I am sorry.
Also I would not suggest depression meds, they carry a risk of dependancy and I just don't believe they are good for someone who is greiving.
2007-01-19 06:43:49 · answer #4 · answered by MyOpinionMatters 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I am so sorry to hear that. You cannot rush into things like getting her back to school. Yes, she needs an education but she needs to grieve. My mother passed away the day after my 18 birthday and I was still in school. I grieved for a good 4-6 months. Take her to talk to a counselor, it will help her to grieve a little faster. She will be able to talk about her feelings and let everyone know how she is feeling, especially if she isn't talking. Grieving takes time. It will heal on its own.
2007-01-19 06:43:08 · answer #5 · answered by dadsbaby79 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Awwwhhhhhh Im Soo Sorry To Hear About Your Loss-ThatsSad
She Should Be Off School Longer-Get Her Into Conseling- That Must Be Hard For Your Daughter- She Needs Time To Heal......................
WHATEVER U DO - SUPPORT HER THROUGH THIS- THIS IS A VERY HARD TIME FOR HER- SHE DEFIENTLY NEEDS IT!
She Should Start Taking Birth Control If She Is Going To Be Sexually Active- 15 Is Defiently Too Young To Have A Child.
At 15 A Girls Body Isnt Fully Developed.........................................
2007-01-19 06:44:48 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
Your daughter definitely needs a lot of counseling to help her deal with this massive loss and to also help her get back into being a teenager again. She also probably needs some anti-depressant meds.
You all are in my prayers :)
2007-01-19 06:42:11 · answer #7 · answered by Smitty 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋