help me please?

Question

i have a boyfriend,i love him so much we having a baby,and i am very happy and pleased but i dont like his mum and i am afraid that i will looose him for that.i just really dont like her.i dont think she is a nice person.we living in her house we paying her so much money and she doesnt even buying things which we want.and for money we giving to her she is on holidays and staff.that just not mum.we having a baby but she didint say nothing about like that dont have to pay so much or summit.what you think?

Answer 1

i think you should move out and spend the money on rent for your own property

Answer 2

Be patient...don't give her reason to dislike you, whatever she does...you can rise above it and come out the winner. It's her house after all and although I think it's mean that she doesn't make you feel more at home, maybe she has other problems you don't know about. I think you should concentrate on being a good mum and girlfriend and plan for the day when you can move into your own place. Try not to make an enemy of your his mum. As for the money, why don't you all sit down and have a conversation about it....why does she ask so much...do you know what the bills cost? Tell her you want to pay your fair share but can you talk it over because you feel it's a lot of money...be polite...be patient...be nice...and try and win her over!

Answer 3

I think you should say to your boyfriend that he is very lucky to have a great mother (yuk) who looks after you so well but you really do feel strongly that its time for you both to look for your own place. Perhaps if he understood you need a nest for you and baby? Maybe he could speak to his mum and ask if you could reduce the amount you are paying so that you could get a place of your own. There will be resistance. Its important that you don't slag off his mother and are really nice to her. Make sure she knows that giving you a home has meant so much to you (lay it on with a trowel). If you brown nose a bit, no-one will suspect you want rid of the witch! You will have to be a great actress but think of the baby and you will have the courage to pull the strings and get what you want and not upset anyone. You can do it!

Answer 4

No surprise you don't like her. Doesn't sound like she's being very helpful.
Again, I don't know how old you are. Are you very young parents that she's trying to teach a lesson to?
The best you can do is just go and rent your own place.
At least you'll have peace.
But if you're very young parents, maybe you want to think about the different bills she's paying apart from her mortgage: electricity; phone, etc...
If you still think that she's definitely taking advantage of you, then move out and give it a real go on your own.
Mother in law are very rarely nice, so when you give them the power to hurt you, they'll do it and enjoy it.
Good luck.x

Answer 5

maybe you should have a talk to your boyfriend , tell him how you feel about this, perhaps it might be a good idea to look for a place of your own , rent a flat if possible ask your boyfriend to talk to his mother . Why are you paying so much money ? maybe the reason she has´t said anything about the baby is because she is still coming to terms with the fact that she is going to be a grandmother. I think you should all sit down and talk about this , First thing when she comes back from her holiday

Answer 6

Well I think you should have paid attention at school, but it's too late for that now. Maybe you should go live somewhere else. If suggesting this is enough to lose your boyfriend then he has obviously been looking for a get out and doesn't love you at all, but if he loves you, as much as he needs to love you if you are having a kid, suggesting a move wouldn't be a problem.

You must really be paying her a lot of money if she is employing staff!

Answer 7

I do think she is being slightly unreasonable since you are carrying her grandchild, but I do suggest you try and get a house of your own as soon as possible and move out then you have the Ace card, namely the child. I don't mean use the child as a bribe, but if you are out of her hair she will come to you to see her grandchild and also see that you are both old enough and responsible enough to be parents, cos she is probably thinking you aren't right now. Do what is best for the baby, that's the only person that matters right now!

Answer 8

I think if you are having a baby then you and your boyfriend should stand on your own two feet and start paying your way. You're old enough to create a new life, so you must be old enough to spend money on this baby.
As for his mum going on holiday ... why not? She's done her child-raising and it's her free time now. If you don't like it, move out and then you will see just how expensive it is out there!
Grow up!

Answer 9

Just move out - I know you probably staying there to save money whatwith babby coming and all, but you both need to bite the bullet and move out if it's not working. Don't diss your b/f's mum to him, just tell him it's real important you get your own place. And just try to get on with her best you can in the meantime - you won't be there forever, but it will feel like forever if there's a bad atmosphere.

Answer 10

Go to the council, get a place of your own, even if you have to go into homeless accomodation for a while. The money you are giving her, surely could go towards renting your own place. It is difficult living with 'inlaws' . My advice is to move, it wont getany better when the baby comes along. Why are you there anyway?

Answer 11

Best thing you can do, save money and get out own your own! You will all be happier and you set the rules, now she is the boss cause it's her house, move out and take the power back.