Baby Group etiquette?

Question

I have this one friend in our baby group who lets her kid run wild when they come over. She plays with all the toys and makes a huge mess everytime they are here. Problem is, they never clean up the toys before they leave. She doesn't even attemp to clean or tell her kid (who is 2 1/2) that they should clean up.
Does anyone else think this is wrong? Do I tell her? And if so, then how do I tell her I don't appreciate the mess they leave behind?
Or do I just suck it up since they are moving across Canada in a few months?

Answer 1

If they leave the mess for you and the others to clean up, I would certainly speak up.

You aren't their maid service. You aren't the parent. But if it is at YOUR house, then it's your rules.

We have a neighbor that has 2 little girls, and they sometimes have this one girl over that behaves like a little monster/prima donna. When this girl arrives, she either plays nice, cleans up after herself, and behaves, or she is sent home. After a few times sent packing, she started to behave better.

It's really up to you, but I certainly wouldn't put up with that crap for a few months just to make them happy. They are leaving, but you don't have to suffer until they do.

Besides, the parents probably don't even think about it. Bring it to their attention, and they may just be polite and correct things they aren't seeing.

Answer 2

My goodness, what kind of example are you setting for the other children?

There's an easy way to handle this that won't put anyone on the spot. Ten minutes before play time is over, declare a group clean-up. There are even cute clean-up songs everyone can sing.

If they leave early, when they are getting ready to go, be sure to smile and remind the child and/or mom in a kind voice to not forget to put some toys away before she goes. Then praise her for being an excellent helper.

Answer 3

My son attends a playgroup sponsored by our public schools and about 10 minutes before the end of the group they have all the kids (And parents) clean up the toys. Just make an announcement that all the kids need to participate. If her child doesn't take her aside and tell her that it is not fair that her child is not helping since she helped make the mess.

Answer 4

I don't think it's okay to go over to someone else's house and leave a mess behind! If they want to leave their house in a mess, that's fine. But when they come to your house, they should have the sense to pick up the toys. I would tell them, I love having you and your child over, but I don't appreciate the mess that is always left behind. Could you help me and your child put away the toys before you leave nex time? Kids are kids, and they make messes. So I think it isn't rude to ask the parents to help clean up the mess.

Answer 5

Take her aside or meet her separately and explain that you love having her at your group but you really need her to start helping out with the clean-up and that she needs to make sure her child exercises a little more control. You'll be doing both mother and child a favor because this behavior will turn into a teen terrorizing everyone.

Answer 6

In my Brownie troop, we stop about 10 minutes early and clean up. EVERYONE cleans up. Nobody leaves until we're done. I have yet to have any parent object, and usually it's the parents who are nagging the girls to hurry up and act right. You should do the same, and have the adults help out so that the burden isn't stuck with the hostess.

Answer 7

Play the clean-up game when it playtime is over. If she has a problem with it, just tell her that by cleaning up now that it will save you lots of time later and that it teaches the children that they have to clean up after themselves. WHICH IS what this MOM needs to learn to!

Answer 8

here is what you do, 10 min before play group ends sing the clean up song-so you dont single out the child or the mother. its an easy song:
clean up clean up
everybody everywhere
clean up clean up
everybody do your share!-you sing it in a real sing song voice. Hope that helps :)

Answer 9

I would just stop inviting her - that's rude - i used to have friends like that - they never would clean up after themselves - like if we were in the kitchen - they would just leave their garbage on the table instead of putting in the trash can a few feet away - I stopped inviting them over. Good luck

Answer 10

At the end of baby group i would just say "ok time to clean up" tell all the kids to help clean up and walk around to help them as well. it's rude of her to expect you to clean up after her child if she is there and seeing what is going on. If it continues just stop inviting her.