Why are so many children having babies?

Question

I've seen so many posts on Answers regarding young girls having babies, or pregnant or wanting to become pregnant and quite frankly, I've become sickened by it. I'm just wondering if these girls are even educated? Where are there parents? Where are the morals? Are we seeing an epidemic or is Yahoo Answers just an abyss of troubled teens wanting advice? But, my word....these are children having children! Where is the sex education? Don't these kids know that when they play with fire they'll eventually get burned? And when they do get pregnant, the majority want an abortion! Has our society stooped that low to accomodate the needs of those who are ignorant?

My husband and I were married 10 years before having our first child and we're working on number two. I knew when I got married that I wanted to wait so that we could settle into our marriage and be financially stable to support children. I knew that if we had unprotected sex, that meant a chance of a baby.

Wow, apparently I've struck a nerve in some of you who think I'm talking about you. I'm not referring to people who've actually made a bad situation good by marrying the person they got pregnant for or have even gotten to a place they feel they've become successful with the situation. I'm referring to these 13-15 year girls who come on here and say they want a baby for their boyfriend who is in jail, or they cheated on their boyfriend and now they are pregnant and should they have an abortion?

If you are offended by my question, then the shoe must be fitting! Don't answer the question if you feel offended. Otherwise, your comments will be thumb-downed!

Oh, and I'm not a b*tch and I'm not juding anyone. This is an open discussion forum so if you can't give an intelligent answer, don't put lame comments.

I can only rate a comment once, so apparently more than myself have thought some of your flaming comments to be "lame" and uninformative. I want to stress the fact that this is an economic question more than anything else. It doesn't have to be popular to get some really good answers. And, yes I live in a democratic country (USA) and can ask this question. I don't consider this a question of abuse either. So, again, if you feel the shoe fits then I'm sorry. This question was not meant for you to answer.

Answer 1

well everyone's not you. congrats on not having children untill your like 35 or 40. but i had my baby at 17. i love him. im in school to be a head nurse (rn) in case you care. my husband is in the army and i couldnt be more happy that i have my son. theise girls need advice so instead of disouraging them with questions like this, take the time to help them. if you dont understand then dont answer it. there are lots of girls that need some real answers and not negative feedback from you. you live your life and be old with a baby but i am enjoying my teen years with my awesome son. at least when he is getting married and having children of his own i will be the cool grandma and not in a wheel chair!

Answer 2

I don't think that the problem is sex ed or the lack thereof, I believe that you stated what the problem is: parents aren't paying attention/aren't there for their children. It isn't always the case, my parents tried to be loving & my mom was a stay-at-home mom....but there were 7 of us!! I ended up pregnant because I had found someone that genuinely loved & cared about me as an individual, something I didn't feel I was getting at home!! However, then, I feel it is MY responsibilty to make sure that my son DOES feel valued as an individual, and to make sure that other girls (and, let's face it, boys, too. Us girls don't get pregnant alone!!) do not travel the same path I did. Because I had been in sex ed....I knew that unprotected sex resulted in a baby. But I did not consider all the costs--and I'm not just talking about money!

And no, most teens nowadays DON'T realize that there are consequences to their actions...because we live for the most part in an IMMORAL society!! Life is not a gift, that is why these 13, 14, 15 year olds can even CONSIDER abortion. I have seen parents bail their children out of trouble (and yes, JAIL) without so much as a slap on the wrist. Spare the rod & spoil the child? Not necessarily. But there do need to be boundaries put in place.

Part of society's problem is also that FATHERS are stepping out of the picture, be it through divorce, or just children being born out of wedlock.....which leaves tons of us single mamas to raise our children alone. If we are at work supporting them (because not all of us will even dare to THINK of accepting welfare!), then who is at home taking care of them??? Thus creating yet another generation 1) left to fend for themselves, 2) doomed to repeat the sins of their parents.

Answer 3

The teen parent epidemic isn't any worse than it has ever been, even in the "perfect" world of the 50's and 60's. Its just that a few generations ago, there was something called "self respect" and "shame." In fact, i think i read recently that teen births are down.

The reason you see so much of it on the Answers is probably because it's an easy, anonymous way to communicate. Feelings of wanting a baby are normal for teens who are jsut learning to cope with adult emotions and stuff, and most of them are smart enough not to get knocked up.

As far as society stooping to help the ignorant, isn't that what the welfare and social services system is all about? Isn't that why at San Diego State University I had to wait until my sophomore year to take Freshman English, even though there were about twice as many sections available for Remedial (AKA, HIGH SCHOOL LEVEL) English?

Now you've got me all upset.

Answer 4

geez calm down! Well, I don't think it is right for children or young teenagers to have children. I got pregnant at 17 and this was planned, I knew that I would be able to provide for my child without any help from my family or the government. It doesn't sounds good, but it's right. I grew up at a young age and I knew I was and am responsible. My parents did not teach me about sex and in school many people did not sign the waiver or were not allowed to be taught education because of their parents. There should be more awareness. everyone is different. I remember when I was 8 months pregnant and it was february, it was FREEZING! I saw a young mother have her baby outside with just a onesie on and no socks. That's totally wrong, I am young, but I'm not stupid! Everyone is different. I see young teens on maury and they want a baby, but no boyfriend or job. It's sad, but hopefully when we get a new president, he or she will help out with the children wanting babies crisis.

Answer 5

Yeah i do agree that you are seeing more and more teens pregnant. Statistics show that the rate is going down but i believe we see it more is because its not as taboo as it once was. I had my daughter at fifteen and my son at seventeen. I don't know what i was thinking but i knew i made my bed and i had to lay in it. I don't think it is right to have a child that young but abortion is the easy way out. I made my life story a success but alot of girls don't. In sex education they tell girls how hard it is with a baby and even send them home with fake babies. I don't think that's enough. When my kids were babies that was the easy part. It's when they are in school and they come home upset that a boy doesn't like them, girls are making rumors about them or just raising them right. I spend more time up at night praying I'm making the right choices in raising them then i ever did when they were babies.
People can make so many excuses that is because of this or because they didn't have that but in reality teens know the consequences.

Answer 6

We have become a society of people who are more accepting of things like this. Think back to 20-30 years ago. Teen mothers were scorned. It was an abomination to become pregnant without being married, teen or not. There was a higher moral standard back then. There are still parents who teach good morals to their kids, but not like in years ago. There are more 2 income households now. Meaning that because both parents are working, someone else is practically raising their kids. I have seen more instances of parents trying to be "friends" or "buddy's" with their kids rather than being a parent to them and setting limits and boundaries for their kids. Too many parents aren't making kids see that their is consequences for their actions. Teens have a mindset that they are invincible and "that will never happen to me". I won't say all kids are like this, because I have met some very respectful teenagers. But we should be seeing that there is a problem here. Apparently there wasn't that much wrong with the way they raised kids back years ago, I think that's what we need to be resorting back to now. Society tried to fix something that apparently wasn't broken to start with. People young and old need to know that there are consequences for all actions.

Answer 7

Well congrats for you!!! I had sex education. My parents were BOTH very active in my life and guess what ??? I got pregnant at 17!! It was my choice. I knew the consequences of unprotected sex and I was prepared for them. I have been married for 8 1/2 years and I have 3 children and we are currently expecting #4. BY CHOICE!!! I would really like to know why it is that you can judge young girls. You have never been in their shoes. ALSO... most of the young girls that I have known to get pregnant DON'T want an abortion. Perhaps you should get your facts straight!

With the question of morals??? LOL... I have only slept with 1 man in MY LIFE. That is my husband. Noone else. Having sex before marriage is not a great thing but just because you get pregnant young does NOT mean you are sleeping with every guy out there. I think the only ignorance society is accomodating is that of people that think that teen pregnancy is only stupid girls sleeping around who have no idea of the chances of pregnancy. Perhaps in your perfect world we would all be like you. Sorry but I say NOT! I wouldn't want to be like you because that would require me to judge someone I know nothing about and to show them that abortion would be their best bet because of the ignorance of people like you.

We don't live off walfare nor do we get our health insurance that way. My hubby works 2 jobs and provides for us. There are a lot of times I get dirty looks from people when they see I don't have a wedding ring on. They don't know that I suffer from preeclampsia and have swelling in my fingers so it wont fit.

Perhaps before you judge you should know more. Good luck on changing before your children wind up just as judgemental!!!

I must agree with the additional information though. If you are not old enough to have a job then don't have sex. Don't have a baby for someone that is in jail. I agree. It just makes me mad to be grouped in with girls like that when I have done everything I can to rise above the decision hubby and I made so young.

Answer 8

I went to high school 20 years ago
I had sex ed
We were to the best way not to get pregnant keeps you pants on
If you have sex take these steps (start of Aids)
women see a doctor and get a form of birth control
girls and boys, use a condom, never have sex with out one
Use a spermicide also

I do not think children are taught how not to get pregnant
I did not have sex until I was 25, 3 weeks before my wedding
I also were married 10 years before I had a plan child

People think giving children information is harmful, It's not

Answer 9

You are completely right. Unfortunately, today's society is so obsessed with sex that it has almost become it's own industry. Many products are marketed to us teens in a sexy type of way. I won't be surprised if I see a commercial some time soon, of a couple having sex and then the ending will be "Got milk?" or "Buy a Honda". And you are also right about the ignorance part. I also believe that plays a big role. Most girls think it's cool to have a baby, but don't realize what kind of time and resources they have to put into it. Hopefully some one reads this and it sparks some intelligence into them.

Answer 10

The current government is pushing "abstinence only" sex education, that is not helping in my opinion. I don't think what we're seeing here is an epidemic, statistics actually saw teen pregnancy going down for sometime, I don't know about just recently though. I think we see lots of them here because it's an anonymous place to have questions answered by knowledgeable adults without their parents finding out.

Answer 11

I agree with you that teenagers shouldn't be having babies, especially if they are not married. And I agree that they do end up in abortion a lot and I am completely against abortion. However, I don't see the problem when say a married 18 year old decides that she wants a baby.