I need some help. Ever since i got voilated 5 years ago ( i'm 15) by my uncle I've been afraid of older men. Especially the hispanic men that follow me around the mall. I'm always scared of them, as if I cant trust them. And I'm afriad that it might happen again.
Can anybody tell me what i should do about this? Counseling wont help, I've already tried it.
2007-01-19 02:40:10 · 6 answers · asked by Anonymous in Health ➔ Mental Health
Really sorry this happened. This will take a really long time to get over. and it will always be in the back of your mind. just know this was not your fault and someone you trusted took advantage of you. This was a person who was supposed to protect you and failed. Let this just make you stronger more aware of your surroundings and never let yourself get in a situation you cant be responsible for. Unfortinatly you will question everyone and trust no one. Learn from this and protect your children when you have them. your not the only one that this has happened to so talk to people and help others that may be going thru something simular. Time will soften these feelings of anger/sadness/ and betrayal... you just cant trust anyone. always watch out for yourself. and try to forgive but dont ever forget. sorry i dont have better advise but this is how i cope hope it helps... make sure you tell someone if you havent.... this person should not be allowed to hurt another family member or another child.... speak up and never be left alone with this person again. I hope you dont have to deal with this person on a daily bases. If you do speak up and get them out of your life you do not need evil people who want to hurt you in your life...
2007-01-19 03:19:17 · answer #1 · answered by asc 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Wonder why the counsling didnt work?Did you like your theripyst?[ I know I messed that word up, sorry] Did you go in there ready to give your all? Maybe you should try it again, this time with somebody else. The only way your going to get thru this is talk about it. If you are a spiritual person talking to God is a good way.One day you are going to have to gather up all your crap you have been carring around, use both arms if you have to, look up in the sky and say "here Lord, you take all this crap, because I cant deal with it no more!" Throw your arms up in the air.Give it all to him. Let Him take over now.So what you are doing is letting go and letting God.Its going to be hard to turn all that **** over to Him, but thats where faith comes in.Try it hon, I promise if you let it , it will work!!I will be praying that your life will get better and I know it will.
2007-01-19 03:05:53 · answer #2 · answered by Leneki 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It seems strange that counseling didn't help. Can you get another one who may be able to help you? It's bad if you have to do it all by yourself. The only thing that I can think of is for you not to go to the malls by yourself. Always take someone with you or just don't go. Walk with the attitude of "Don't mess with me." Don't walk like a hooker, etc. Walk with confidence. If someone approaches you, do the best you can not to let them get close enough to grab your arm. Don't go anywhere with anyone. Never go anywhere that is isolated. That's where a lot of trouble happens. They want to be where nobody can see them. Scream as loud as you can for help if someone does approach you or touches you in a way you are afraid. Try to be around a lot of people if you are by yourself. Be careful.
2007-01-19 02:56:33 · answer #3 · answered by Barbra 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
to start i'm 38 ok and i have 2 nieces, 13 and 17 and i love them very much and protect them especially when their dad (my brother) is working, i somewhat know how you feel because my exgirlfriend was abused also by a family member and she told me everything and i could't belive it because he was a friend of mines at that time, well my frienship with him has changed, every man out there are not the same they are not going to atack you in a public place like the mall, try counselling again because you are still young and have a full life ahead of you and many people love you, good luck and a bright future is waiting for you
2007-01-19 02:55:17 · answer #4 · answered by day dreamer 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Counseling WILL help if you want help. You have to be willing and be able to take suggestions. If you go in with that attitude that it's not going to help, you are just sabotaging yourself.
Don't be a victim. And believe me.....no one is following all the time at the mall. No men, women, no matter what their race. You are paranoid and HAVE to go back to counseling if you want to stop feeling this way.
2007-01-19 02:47:10 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
So, if nothing happened, don't you think that it's just all in your head? They're not going to pounce on you. (not that I don't believe the anxiety you're experieincing). I'm simply pleading with the logical part of you.
If you still get anxious, you need to work on grieving your loss, gradually, in time, you'll make peace with your past.
one day at a time,
2007-01-19 02:48:31 · answer #6 · answered by thru a glass darkly 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋