mostly clean jokes??

Question

Coffee and Donuts at the Nude Beach

Who's the most popular guy at a nude beach?
The guy who can carry two cups of coffee and seven donuts.
Who's the most popular girl at a nude beach?
The girl who can eat the seventh donut.
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Mistaken Identity

A drunk guy is walking down the street. He sees this nun, runs up and knocks her over. He says, "You don't feel so tough now, do you, Batman!?"
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One Friday night, a policeman saw a car parked up at "makeout point." Shining his flashlight in the window, he saw a young
man fidgeting in the front seat glancing at his watch and a young woman sitting in the back seat and reading a magazine.

"Excuse me, son" said the cop, "but how old are the two of you?"

"I'm eighteen, sir, and" (checking his watch another time) "in ten more minutes, she'll be eighteen too!"

Answer 1

Very funny. Copy several to my friend to share the joy.

Thanks

Answer 2

what's orange and goes weh!weh? a wounded cheesie. What do you call a guy who swims across the English Channel with no arms and no legs........? Clever Dick What's brown and sticky? A stick! What does the ocean say to the beach? Nothing it just waves! what do you get when you cross a kangaroo and an elephant? a lot of holes in Australia Your mama's so skinny she can hang glide from a dorito. OHHHHH and my favorite.......Whats a fly with no wings???? A walk. hahahaha! I really do love that on. How many hamsters does it take to screw in a light bulb? 2 but don't ask me how they got in the light bulb Why did the pervert cross the road? His nob was stuck in the chick. What happens when you cross a singer and a rocking chair? -- you rock to the beat. How do you mend a broken jack o' lantern? -- with a pumpkin patch. what do you call a lease of false teeth? -- a dental rental Where did the kittens go on the class trip -- to the meow-seum. What goes tick-tock, woof-woof? -- a watchdog What did the art dealer say when a man asked what a picture was supposed to be? -- a reflection of you. what did the girl sea say when the boy sea asked her for a date? -- shore What falls down but never gets hurt? -- snow What kind of brush do you use to comb a bee's hair? -- a honey comb How do you get a peanut to laugh? -- you crack it up Who greets you at a haunted house? -- a host ghost Why did the farmer bury all his money? -- to make his soil rich Where can you find an ocean without water? -- on a map What do you call a horse that likes arts & crafts? -- a hobby horse Why do shoemakers go to heaven? Because they have good soles What do you call an avid gardener? -- herb If fruit comes from a fruit tree, where does chicken come from? -- a poul-tree What do you get when you cross a grape with a lion? -- a grape nobody picks on What did the tree say to the mountain? -- stop peaking at me! What are sailors' favorite fruits? -- naval oranges Where does a penguin keep his money? -- in a snow bank What did the boy chip say to the girl chip (crisp for the Brits)? -- Let's dance and I'll dip you. Why do bees have sticky hair? -- they use honeycombs Why did the reporter go into the ice cream shop? -- he wanted to get the scoop Why was it hard for the geometry teacher to walk? -- she broke her angle What do you call a monkey who loves potato chips? -- a chipmonk What kind of trees sew? -- pine trees, they always have needles around What did the plate say to the other plate? -- lunch is on me. What did the man say when the picture fell on his head? -- I've been framed! Did you hear about the mummies who went to the theater? -- They gave the actors stage fright How do you turn soup into gold? -- add 24 carrots (karats) What do you do if a rhino charges you? -- Give him your credit card. Why did they bury the battery? -- Because it was dead. What do sneezes wear on their feet? -- ahh-shoes What do wolves say when they are introduced? -- howl do you do? What does a car run on? -- wheels What did the sink say to the water faucet? -- you're a real drip where do pigs park their cars? -- in a porking lot Why did the banana leave the cinema? -- the film didn't appeal to him. Why did the little cookie (biscuit) cry? -- because his mother was a wafer so long. What do you call a hot dog in a bun? -- an in betweenie weenie. Why did the rabbit eat lunch under the sink? -- He found a leek there. How do you make a witch itch? -- take away her W What do you call two guys fighting over a prostitute? -- tug of whore *ok, so that was mine. Just threw it in to see if you were paying attention* What do you call a crab who plays baseball? -- a pinch-hitter What is the clumsiest bee? -- a bumbling bee What kind of bean can't grow? -- a jelly bean Whats green and fluffy and comes from mars? -- a martian mellow How does a man on the moon get his hair cut? -- eclipse it What do you do when you have no rubber bands? -- find a plastic orchestra -- -- -- -- and some old favorites -- -- -- -- -- - What time is it when an elephant sits on your fence? -- time to get a new fence. What is green, red, and runs 100 mph? -- a frog in a blender What is yellow, has wheels and lies on its back? -- a dead school bus Why did the man throw his margarine? -- he wanted to see the butter fly What did the finger say to the thumb? -- I'm in glove with you (heather's favorite) What's brown and sticky? -- a stick What's red and not there -- no tomatoes What's white and flies through the sky? -- the coming of the lord What do you get when you cross a turkey with a penguin? -- a very cross penguin thats all i know.

Answer 3

i am looking for a girl to eat the last donut as well hanna other two were just as good 10/10

Answer 4

Why was the cross-eyed teacher in trouble?

He couldn't control his pupils.

Answer 5

hahaha! I loved the last two! I didn't quite get the first one.

Answer 6

Hehehehheehhehehhe!!!! Those are interesting crackers!!!!! I love the first one!!!

Answer 7

laughed out loud at the batman one, excellent...

Answer 8

good! especially like the first one!

Answer 9

lol@last one...all funny tho...thanks

Answer 10

Thanks for the laugh,lol.
Gives a new meaning to dunkin donuts, lol.