Does anyone have problems with a step child?

Question

Feelings of resentment?

Answer 1

fortunately no.....although i am not married to their dad i have watched them grow for almost 11 years and have been there for them through everything and have always got on with them, some kids do feel resentment because hey think that the other person is trying to take over from their mum or dad, it depends how YOU handle it, be their friend if you are a stepchild, it's not a matter of someone trying to replace a parent, it's just that they love your mum/dad and want to be with them, and YOU for that matter so go easy on the step parent, they don't mean any harm, life goes on hun, you have to deal with it the best way you can

Answer 2

I have two step daughters, 17 and 15. We get on well but its been an interesting 9 years or so. They have a close relationship with their dad, which is good, but also one with his girlfriend who is very immature and fills their heads with nonsense.

As one of the other guys said, you have to rise above the usual negative stuff and over time it will all become much easier. We have a 6 year old between us and that helped immensely although they had some resentment towards her initially as the attention was being split three ways rather than two.

Treat a step child as if it was your own child in all ways, don't make special allowances and don't be deliberately unfair and you won't go far wrong.

Answer 3

Hi If your living with the Step Child then its important not to come across as the NEXT mum. You've probably heard it before but be a good friend/confidant. Step children will not want to see you a substitute. They already have a mum (or had one) try not to lay the law down too much and coming across as bossy even if it is your home they may be living in. It is a huge change for everyone and whilst you may be happy with your new husband, don't expect your children to be as well. Try talking with then not at them and come to a compromise. Children are not monsters but just like everyone else they will react when verbally attacked'. Reasoning, talking and a lot of love should result in a good relationship between everyone

Answer 4

I was one. Do they resent you or you resent them? (that is a fair question...) Remember - their world is being rocked about at the moment - and you, while not the cause necessarily, are a product of that - you have to understand rocky feelings - especially if they are in their teens - hormones can do silly things....!

Answer 5

if you have a partner who has kids from a previous relationship u shouldnt feel resentful or hateful toward them..u knew the score when u meet ur partner and some people come as a package and if you love your partner then u must accept the kids

Answer 6

You need to grow up and get a grip.You are jealous of the love your mate has for a child? This is insane the love between a man and woman and the love between parent and child is 2 totally different things!

Answer 7

None whatsoever.i have a 3 year old step child now and in a previous long term relationship i had another step child,whom i still see.

Answer 8

I don't have any step children but, i do know that you can't force them to call you mom or dad.... they won't want to do that... so instead, do what my friend did.... let them pick out a nickname for you ( no swear words obviously), and then let them address you by that name... it will make the transition a lot easier on the both of you.

Answer 9

Nope. I lay down the law in my home and it's understood. I still have to remind them their daddy doesn't run the show in our home (and he really doesn't in his). I have 3 step kids. I love them very much. But, you can't let them walk all over you. You have to get down to their level, really look them in the eyes, and tell them how things are going to be in your home.

Answer 10

no I have 2 from relationship that ended but we are still close just remember you can not and will never replace that childs real parent even if they are a crappy one!