I have a four year old and have decided to leave work to look after him?

Question

instead of having him in nursery all day - what are the implications for this regarding my benefits? i claim tax credits, childcare (which will obviously be cancellled), housing benefit - i have worked out that by working the last four years because i felt i had to on a socially acceptable level i have basically had the government pay for my childcare and would prefer they just paid me so i can actually spend time with my boy instead.. your views please?!

Answer 1

I would be interested to see the statistics on what ultimately it costs to care for a woman and her children in a decent but modest standard of living, versus care for her children while she works, be giving her some benefits anyway, and pay professionals to do a far less valid job of raising those kids. There's plenty of statistics on the health problems, emotional problems, etc., of women who try to do it all, but what about those who don't? What about the woman who says, "My kid is more important than my pride, and I am going to be sure I'm the one raising him, not some faceless day care."

Have enough women taken this route for there to even be statistics? Because riding the bus, I know an awful lot of kids and moms are getting up at the crack of dawn, riding the bus to the date care center, then on to work for mom, to reverse the process at night. And using busses to do that makes it take longer, but is the only solution for someone who cannot afford to support a car. I know it's not great for either the moms or the kids. Trust me; it's not great for the other passengers when the kids are riding home, hyped up and eager for mom's attention, and mom is so exhausted she's really not prepared to deal with what this is doing to the other passengers on the bus.

What about the district attorney's office and getting the father to provide some support? Is that feasible in your case? That works for a lot of people, especially now that DNA makes it pretty easy to be sure who the father is.

Seems to me if there are foundations and creative use of grant money and so on, we could support such a mother and child as an investment in the future. To support a huge bureaucracy to support them, no. We can't afford that.

Vote Libertarian for a change.

Answer 2

I'm not sure about the benefits, although my tax credit entitlement ceased when I gave up work. I can say that it is the best thing I ever did as my social life is better than ever and I often wonder when I ever got time to work. My oldest daughter is at nursery school from 9am - 11:30am, in her preschool year. Whilst she is there, me and the youngest (5 months) rush around doing messages, or swim, or go to toddler groups or do housework (if I have time). My afternoons are then free to spend with the 2 girls together and they are just brilliant. I am permanently skint, but have never been happier. It's amazing what really cheap or free activities there are out there to fill your day. Even a trip to the park is made into a big adventure, or a walk by the sea. Highly recommended.

Answer 3

A 4year-old needs social interaction. By taking him out of nursery you might be doing more harm then good. He is used to being with other children in a nursery settings. Have you thought of seeing it from his point of view?
I have a 3.5year-old that is in nursery 3 full dys a week now. She has been going since she was 18 months and her friends there are part of her world. I wouldn't dream of taking her out.
On top of that he will be preparing for KeyStage1. He can technically stay in a nursery till he is 5. The local school tries to have me believe that if i send my daughter to their pre-school (she can go next September) it will be to her advantage because it will instill a routine in her for when real school starts.
As if ... she will be getting 2.5 hours a day. No mealtime association apart from fruit break. She will loose all her friends from nursery and be part of what to her would be playgroup. She will have to adapt to new teachers and will have to start learning proper parrot style (think they call it route learning).
As for the money side of it all ... you are entitled to 5x2.5 hour sessions a week. A lot of nurseries allow you to combine them, for instance 2x a 5-hour session and another 2.5 or more and pay the differrence. You don't have to use them but if you don't i don't believe you are doing the child any favours. Where i live even on the minimuum wage for a 40-week you get no housing benefit. If you stop working though you will get benefit. Beware though, you will not JSA if you quit your job voluntarily. Think you will have to apply for income support in that case. Considering it takes over a month in some cases before they sort it all out you have some lovely trips with your 4-year old to your local Benefits office. A lovely environment for a 4-year old to hang out in ... NOT!
What about working part-time? If you have a partner only one of you has to work 16+ hours a week to get the child care element of tax benefits. The other part of it you get wether working or not.
As for the government paying for your childcare ... if you've worked you've paid taxes. You are indirectly paying for your own childcare anyway.
Ring Tax Credits and ask them how your payments will be affected.I have found them people very helpful in the past. A lot more helpful than any of the automatons i have had the pleasure to encounter at benefit offices.

Peace x

Answer 4

I am currently working part-time from home. A couple of years ago, I was miserable. I would get up in the morning, get my son off to school, drive 37 miles to work, work hard for 9 hours, and drive 37 miles home. Each night I'd get home around 6pm or so, tired, miserable and cranky. I spent less than 2 hours with my son before he had to be in bed. My husband and I barely spoke. Weekends were spent recuperating from the work week and doing chores, instead of being a family.

When I sat down and crunched the numbers... nearly half of my salary was going toward travel & upkeep of my vehicle and paying someone else to watch my child after school! Tell me... where was the trade-off? I was angry and resentful. Back when my Mom was a girl, it was socially unacceptable for a woman to hold a job and now it's frowned-upon if she wants to stay home. Let's not forget the fact that the economy is such that most women HAVE to work! When I realized that my hard work wasn't really contributing as much as I thought, I started working at home, part-time.

Since then, my relationship with my husband has greatly improved. My house is a little cleaner. I volunteer for the American Cancer Society, which is more fulfulling than any paying job I ever had. I smile more. I listen better. I'm less reactive. ...and, most importantly, I feel like the Mom I'm supposed to be. This is the best position I've ever held, and I'm a better wife and mother for it.

Don't get me wrong... it's not without its hardships, but I can tell you that my heart sings every afternoon when my son gets off that bus. We now have plenty of time for homework, laughter, and snuggling. I know I made the right decision.

As far as benefits... fisrt thing to do is make an appointment to speak with someone at the state. Whether this is applicable to you or not... There is a misconception that the government won't help if you're married and/or working, but there are some assistance programs available to make things a little easier for lower income households. In our case, we work hard to make ends meet, but we can't afford insurance. The important program we qualified for is the medical and dental coverage for our son.

Answer 5

First it all depends on the state you live in.
Most government plans do not pay a lot for daycare. They have worked out arrangements with the daycare, like tax breaks. I don't think they are going to pay you for staying home with your child.
There are many benefits available to you, if you do not already receive them,
You probably have a case worker if you get help with child care, if not call social services WIC is a great program.
There are Tax breaks check the tax filing book or call

The biggest benefit you will get is being home with your son nothing in this world can replace that. He will start kindergarten at 5 (depending on his b'day) so your not giving that much time up....but they grow up very fast Enjoy these last few months you have some extra bonding.
For the short time it may not even effect your tax

Answer 6

you can go on the tax credits website and work out what you would be entitled to, just tap in other income and they will calculate what you would recieve from them if you stopped work. your son will be in school soon anyway, mine started the 4+ unit sept after he was 4 so maybe things would not work out the way you expect them to. being at home all day while your kid is in school can get pretty boring, especially if you are relying on benefits and therefore not so well off to go shopping ect every day. have a think about it, weigh up the pros and cons then make your decision. best of luck

Answer 7

you should of went part time as you can get working tax credit and they will help with your rent and your get free school meals and prescriptions.as you have given up work now when your toddler will be starting nursery which is free .and now your gonna be bored at home all day every day with no social life .think about it and good luck

Answer 8

If you are a lone parent and not working you will go on income support anyway; you will alos then get housing benefit paid directly to landlord. Contact DSS straight away .

Answer 9

i unfortunatley had to give up work to care for my disabled son. I get income support and carers allowance. I feel isolated now and would say to anyone if you don't have to give up work don't. I would love to be working it gave me adult company and a sense of worth. I was better off financially too.

Answer 10

I would love for the government to pay me, too, but why should they??? I stay home with my two kids, but have no expectation of taxpayer money. What are you thinking?