okay so four years ago met a guy, perfect guy, some rough patches (on my behalf) got the best of us and the two months of bliss were gone...i messed up and have admitted it and apologized..maybe woulda gone away, but since the time of the split has still maintained something of a relationship w/ me...he has girlfriend on very serious level...and i now have boyfriend on an almost as serious level...but we've never stopped seeing each other...problem: since he's been in my life this long, i cant shake the feelings for him, which in turn makes me treat my man like less of a man b/c of these feelings for this other man...not fair to him...other guy doesn't even really do his part, but if i try to let it go or cut it off he makes a huge ordeal and insists on making it right...i mean, four years...what do i do, i know where my heart is and then i know where it should be...my man is great and i shouldnt be asking for anything more...just can't help it...aggghhhh
2007-01-18 16:20:01 · 10 answers · asked by michelle 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
The new man you are seeing is not the one. If he was you would not have time to think of your old flame/friend. If you want to give your new relationship a go you must tell your friend that for the time being you want to concentrate on you and the new man exclusively. Maybe it would also be a good idea if the four of you got together periodically. Spending time with your s/o and your friend and his/her s/o is what friends do when they want to share their life and have nothing to hide.
2007-01-18 16:41:10 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Let the guy know that u can't go on being his no.2.
If he wants things to continue that way it has been, u have no choice but to put it to an end.
About ur bf, I think u should be fair to him. If you think you cannot give him the love he deserves, u should end ur relationship soon as it's not going anywhere.
I've somewhat been in ur bf's shoes n used to blame myself for the way things went wrong. But looking back now, I realise i was wrong cos I've been as caring as I could.
Remember, if both parties don't feel the same way, things aren't going to work out.
2007-01-18 17:05:11 · answer #2 · answered by Vin 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
This is the kind of question that you should not take advice from over the internet. If it's been that long, our opinion will do you no good except give you the right to have false feelings for someone. Honestly what I think you should do is get counsiling from someone professional. We're only here to offer advice and some words to guide you in the right direction. If you listen to people here about what you should do, then you're taking a risk of not doing what is right. If you need anymore help, please email me or PM me.
2007-01-18 16:25:38 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You cannot move on until you have let go, completely! No matter who you date from now on if you can't get him out your system then all your future relationships will go sour. It's not fair for the next man, and it's not fair to yourself to hold on to old feelings this strongly. Of course we will always have a connection with people we've been with in the past but, you can't live the past. Live for today and tomorrow will take care of itself.
2007-01-18 16:28:26 · answer #4 · answered by saturn man 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Can't help it or don't want to let go? There's a big difference. It's obviously causing major turmoil in your life and you need to make a decision. However, I should caution you, that in whatever it is you decide, you do it with your heart, not with the surrounding circumstances. Life is short honey and it wouldn't be fair to stay with one when your heart is with another. Just make sure he feels the same way before you make any life altering decisions.
2007-01-18 16:25:15 · answer #5 · answered by Hollynfaith 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
u no that ur man is great,try to no why? when u try REALLy try u'll find out that u don't need the other guy anymore.forget about the past,all the aspects and memories of it,and think TRULY think and concentrate in the present and the future represented by ur great man.don't lose hope ,don't lose real love ,and don't lose ur great guy for the sake of somebody left u.
2007-01-18 16:29:37 · answer #6 · answered by zein_egypt 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You can't get back time.
It is cruel for you to waste your boyfriend's time.
It is silly for you to waste YOUR time on someone who insist on making you play second fiddle.
If the memories of your first encounter with this man are so strong, great--you've the memories where ever you go. Now, go AWAY from him.
2007-01-18 16:32:50 · answer #7 · answered by ? 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
woah woah woah, slow down... just be as good a friend as u can be with your friend that is dating the other girl. U would know if he still had feelings for u. sounds to me like he feels the same way. just stick with ur current bf, and in the end your heart will guide you.
2007-01-18 16:26:58 · answer #8 · answered by ZeRo 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you think that you and this other guy love each other and you obviously can't stop talking make it work! don't regret this for the rest of your life! also make sure he doesn't just want you there just to be there.
2007-01-18 16:25:23 · answer #9 · answered by Waythere 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
get your head chekked girlie...if he's with someone else and you are with someone else then leave it alone already...otherwise both of you break up with your current partners before having crazy sex like you obviously want too...
2007-01-18 16:26:19 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋