Scared of the future?

Question

I'm a girl, 19 about to turn twenty in a couple months. I'm going to school for a BA in Psych and a minor in Anthro. I'm an only child and still living with my parents who are paying for my education. I've never been on a date or kissed anyone and still a virgin. Very antisocial. Working at a minimum wage job.

When every I think about the future and what is going to happen after collage I start to shake and sweat I'm so terrified. Sometimes it gets so bad that I stay awake all night worring about the future. Taxes, bills, mortgage, a job! I look for a better paying job but every one wants management with prior experience, which I have non of. I still have no clue what I want to do with the rest of my life,

Can anyone offer any advice or tell me what wrong with me?

Answer 1

Nothing is wrong with you. Anxiety about the future is perfectly normal for anyone, no matter what their age. It's escpecially a problem for a college student, because we're on our way to being thrown out into the big bad world and we have no experience in it! This is why college is so good. It eases you out of life with your parents and slowly brings you into life on your own. My advice is to take courses at school that will help you prepare later down the road. It seems like a lot of your concerns are financial. Try taking a personal finance course. As far as finding a job, you have to start at the bottom no matter where you go. Unfortunately, the bottom usually means low wages. But you can move up from the bottom, whatever your job is, by taking on additional responsibility and showing initiative. Do something without being told to. Ask to learn to do something new. You'll start seeing raises in no time, and you might even get a foot in the door as a manager. Once you grauate, your school's career center will be able to help you find a job in your field. Try to get an internship before you graduate. Again, this will get your foot in the door and give you some prior experience so that when you get out there, you'll have something under your belt to put in your resume.

You also mentioned that you're rather antisocial. You wouldn't have mentioned that if you weren't unhappy about it. You can change that if you want. Try getting involved in a student group at your college. Your Student Activities department should have a list of all the groups at your school. Find one that looks interesting, and join it! This will introduce you to new people, help you make friends, and keep your occupied. I know I'm happiest, as are most peope I know, when I'm more involved. Making new friends will boost your confidence and you'll start to feel better about yourself, which could help this whole anxiety issue you're facing. Not to mention you'll have more fun. You NEED to have fun. Enjoy today as much as you can, because the moment is all you have. If you keep focusing so much on the future, you won't be able to enjoy today. The key word in there being JOY. Find something that brings you joy and keep that in your life. Being happy NOW is what really matters. Prepare for the furture, obviously, but live in the present. You only get to live each moment once, so make the most of it!


Good luck. Hope this helped.

Answer 2

Sounds like you need to get out and about a little more! But you also may be having panic attacks when you sweat and stuff, doctor's can prescribe mild anti-anxiety drugs for you but try going out and meeting new people and seeing new places so your fears will not trap you in your self! The future is scarey for alot of people and since you don't socialize much and live w/ parents, you have to go out and see the world, (start slowly) and realize what is what! Also maybe look up some classes about the things you worry about, taxes (I am 48 & still don't have a clue!) Bills are something every body has to deal w/ so look at it this way- everything your worried about is also almost everyone else's worry too! So your not alone. Since your parents are paying for school and u lve w/ them are you saving your wages to help you get a good start on your future? That would be a good idea-but spend a little on a new outfit and ask someone you get along well with to go out to a movie or pizza and just talk and see how they feel about the future- you will soon know u r nt alone!

Answer 3

You are experiencing natural anxiety of the unknown, of things you cannot control... just remember that if you step back , outside of yourself and see things from a distance, it's not as scary as you think. If you're going to school to do what you've mentioned, believe me, you will not be making minimum wage, you can make anything you want with your own career, your own office etc. Antisocial is someone who cannot live in society, who cannot act like a "normal" person, who can be dangerous (serial killers are antisocial), you're probably just shy. I was for so many years. Why don't you try reading some good positive self help books or trying to change your image, something that makes you feel more confident. Don't worry so much, most people are nervous or uncomfortable to a certain level in public. Read Kimora Lee Simmon's Fabulosity - What it is and How to Get It..... it's such a cute empowering book for woman..... good luck

Answer 4

Tomorrow will come whether you worry about it or not...the condition you arrive in is up to you. Today is where you live - enjoy today (college, family, not paying a mortgage). You will have the degree and what you need for a great job when you graduate. The world and you will be different by that time. Don't miss today by worrying about tomorrow. Less than 30% of people in America have a graduate degree, you are already on the right road - There is always someone worse off than you - just be thankful for what you do have.

Answer 5

Being scared of the future is normal just don't go over board with it. Try to live for each day as it comes. Study hard and get your education and a good job Life has its own problems for that day don't worry about those bad things that have not even happened yet.

Answer 6

Sounds like you have anxiety. I can still remember, as a teenager, worrying about the same thing. I'm 30 now, a single mother of two, and I'm doing great. Calm down, it's not that hard. Although, I don't have a college education, I DO strongly recommend you finishing yours. That will make things 10 times easier.

Answer 7

I love the answer ~*Bubbles gave to you.

I can certainly understand your fear. Reminds me of a bird about to take flight for the first time from it's nest. Scary I'm sure, but just imagine what it must feel when it suddenly realizes that it can truly fly!

Everything will be okay. Continue in your studies, make a goal to to introduce yourself to one new person a month, and enjoy the ride.

Your life is like driving a car. However, some people spend all their time looking in the review mirror. They miss what is up ahead due to living in the past. Sounds like you are missing the scenery for trying to see around the curves. (smiles)

Try to sit back.... and ride..... enjoy.... glimpse at the mirror every once in awhile just to keep things in check. Anticipate the curves and be careful,....but relax.....and enjoy the scenery of 'now'.

(((hugs tight))

Answer 8

nothing is wrong with you.
you are having certain misconceptions about society / future and taking life too seriously.
be a little(very little)careless and be happy because you are capable of facing everything which may come in your way.
YOU POSSESS SOMETHING WHICH IS COSTLESS & RARE.
PRESERVE IT FOR SOME MORE TIME.YOU ARE AMONG A FEW IN LACS HAVING SOMETHING PRECIOUS.THIS VERY FACT SHOULD GIVE YOU IMMENSE JOY , A SUPERIORITY COMPLEX. FEEL PROUD.

Answer 9

You say you are "very anti-social" .. I find that interesting. Do you ever wonder why ? If you have such an extreme reaction to thinking about the future .. I would find a professional to talk about it with. It couldn't hurt (?) .. Good Luck to you! :)

Answer 10

God can be your best friend in life. God loves you and you are precious to Him. All you need is God, for this life and life after.

In the Beginning God created heavens and earth.
God gives you air to breathe and sunshine to enjoy.
God gives you water to drink and food to eat.
God gives you a wonderful body and sound mind, to live.
God loves you, and you are precious to Him.
Son of God died on the Cross to save us from condemnation.
Jesus’ love is boundless and everlasting.
We have the hope of Heaven through Jesus.
Life therefore has fantastic and glorious future!
(Please must visit: www.spiritlessons.com)