Ive herd a few just wanted to know sum more
2007-01-18 15:39:01 · 11 answers · asked by blue_man_ghost 2 in Entertainment & Music ➔ Jokes & Riddles
If you can see Chuck Norris, he can see you. If you can't see Chuck Norris, then you may only be seconds away from death.
2007-01-18 16:00:19 · answer #1 · answered by punchy333 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Guns don't kill people. Chuck Norris kills People.
There is no theory of evolution. Just a list of animals Chuck Norris allows to live.
Chuck Norris does not sleep. He waits.
The chief export of Chuck Norris is Pain.
There is no chin under Chuck Norris' Beard. There is only another fist.
Chuck Norris has two speeds. Walk, and Kill.
The leading causes of death in the United States are: 1. Heart Disease 2. Chuck Norris 3. Cancer
Chuck Norris drives an ice cream truck covered in human skulls.
Chuck Norris is my Homeboy.
Chuck Norris doesn't go hunting.... CHUCK NORRIS GOES KILLING
When the Boogeyman goes to sleep every night, he checks his closet for Chuck Norris.
Chuck Norris doesn't read books. He stares them down until he gets the information he wants.
There is no theory of evolution. Just a list of creatures Chuck Norris has allowed to live.
Outer space exists because it's afraid to be on the same planet with Chuck Norris.
Chuck Norris does not sleep. He waits.
Chuck Norris is currently suing NBC, claiming Law and Order are trademarked names for his left and right legs.
Chuck Norris is the reason why Waldo is hiding.
Chuck Norris counted to infinity - twice.
There is no chin behind Chuck Norris’ beard. There is only another fist.
When Chuck Norris does a pushup, he isn’t lifting himself up, he’s pushing the Earth down.
Chuck Norris is so fast, he can run around the world and punch himself in the back of the head.
Chuck Norris’ hand is the only hand that can beat a Royal Flush.
There is no such thing as global warming. Chuck Norris was cold, so he turned the sun up.
Chuck Norris can lead a horse to water AND make it drink.
Chuck Norris doesn’t wear a watch, HE decides what time it is.
Chuck Norris gave Mona Lisa that smile.
Chuck Norris can slam a revolving door.
Chuck Norris does not get frostbite. Chuck Norris bites frost
Remember the Soviet Union? They decided to quit after watching a DeltaForce marathon on Satellite TV.
Contrary to popular belief, America is not a democracy, it is a Chucktatorship.
2007-01-18 15:42:18 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Guns don't kill people. Chuck Norris kills People.
There is no theory of evolution. Just a list of animals Chuck Norris allows to live.
Chuck Norris does not sleep. He waits.
The chief export of Chuck Norris is Pain.
There is no chin under Chuck Norris' Beard. There is only another fist.
Chuck Norris has two speeds. Walk, and Kill.
The leading causes of death in the United States are: 1. Heart Disease 2. Chuck Norris 3. Cancer
Chuck Norris drives an ice cream truck covered in human skulls.
Chuck Norris is my Homeboy.
Chuck Norris doesn't go hunting.... CHUCK NORRIS GOES KILLIN
Go here for more http://www.chucknorrisfacts.com/
2007-01-18 15:43:02 · answer #3 · answered by Dr.B 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Once Chuck Norris walked down the street with an erection - 18 people died and 237 were seriously injured.
God wanted 10 days to make the heavens and earth. Chuck Norris gave him 6 and told him he was lucky to get it.
2007-01-18 16:45:53 · answer #4 · answered by nyninchdick 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
My favourites Q: If Superman and the Flash race to the top of the earth who could win? A: Chuck Norris Q:What beats rock, paper and scissors all of sudden? A:Chuck Norris Q:Chuck Norris as soon as bought a endure Pregnant by way of simply starring at it. A:It was once a male endure Q:Chuck Norris is presently suing ABC. A:Claiming Law and Order are trademarked names for his left and proper legs.
2016-09-07 23:06:34 · answer #5 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
There is no chin under Chuck Norris' beard, only another fist," and "Chuck Norris' hand is the only hand that can beat a Royal Flush."
2007-01-18 15:43:32 · answer #6 · answered by Crash 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
My friend and I always say this instead of the Pledge of Allegiance at school in the morning...
I pledge allegiance to Chuck Norris, of the United States of Norris, and to Chuck, for which he stands, one nation, under Chuck, indivisible, with liberty and justice for Chuck.
2007-01-18 15:46:11 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
-Chuck Norris once roundhouse kicked someone so hard that his foot broke the speed of light, went back in time, and killed Amelia Earhart while she was flying over the Pacific Ocean.
-If you ask Chuck Norris what time it is, he always says, "Two seconds till." After you ask, "Two seconds to what?" he roundhouse kicks you in the face.
2007-01-18 15:47:56 · answer #8 · answered by Amanda 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If there was a fight between Chuck Norris and God, who would win?
A: Chuck norris is God.
P.S. its a trick question/joke.
2007-01-18 15:43:47 · answer #9 · answered by PeppermintPandora<3 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Chuck Norris is actualy already dead......the problem is that death it self is to afraid to tell him.
2007-01-19 06:21:56 · answer #10 · answered by teban 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋