my mother skips work a few days a month because of "depression" as she calls it. all she wants to do is smoke cigarettes and sleep, sometimes she'll sleep all weekend and get nothing done. i think a part of this has to do with my father that cheats on her without caring if she knows. she says it doesn't bother her and she tells me it's none of my concern. she also has this thing with thinking she's mentally depressed, like she has a natural chemical imbalance. i try telling her that it's how she lives her life instead of a natural cause of depression, but she won't have it. she's obsessed with telling herself that she needs different anti-depressants because she's unhappy and whenever i come over to keep her company, she just sits there and seems bored. i don't know what to do to help her. does she need a hobby? what should i suggest? is there a way to make her stop thinking that how she feels will be cured by pills?
2007-01-18 14:13:05 · 8 answers · asked by lilu 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
your mom is trying to evade her problem, she thinks she can be cured organically but the problem is not organic, its emotional. if it was on chem. imbalance on her brain she wouldnt be sane at all.
she needs someone to talk to about her concerns adn be enlightened. someone who is older probably or just same age as hers. does she have friends? you can ask them to be there. if not, gotta find a counselor near you, could be from a neighboring church or organization. :)
2007-01-18 14:34:23 · answer #1 · answered by Mei T 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
She doesn't think she is depressed- she IS depressed, and inabillity to act or move forward is one of the many symptoms she is describing.
I know it is hard to see her so unable to help herself, but it really IS a chemical imbalance and it IS treatable.
medication alone will not help.
She needs to be in active therapy, learning skills to help herself.
At least she is functioning enough to work most of the time.
If she is working, why not take her to lunch instead of visiting her when she is most low. You may be more effective at communicating with her then.
Your help and support are crucial. It IS a real disorder, and she IS suffering. You cannot make her do or think anything- you can just tell her how you feel.
read up on the disorder and be armed with good information from reliable trustworthy sources.
Good luck.
2007-01-18 22:25:24 · answer #2 · answered by CYP450 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
The first thing you need to know is you really can't help her. The only thing you can do is to try to get her to go to the doctor and if she decides that she doesn't need to go then there is not a lot you can do. I have been depress before and no one could help me until I was really ready to get help. I had to take pills and talk to a someone to get better. My mother has been depressed for years and I tried to get her to get help she refuses. I can see that thing are not right but she blames everyone else. At some point, for my own health reasons I decided that I could not be at her pity party anymore and if she couldn't get help it would limete our relationship. I do not spend as much time with her as I use to and I have quit trying to get her to go to any doctor. She hasn't seen a regular doctor in 36 years. She has health problems too. My parents have good insurance and my father goes to the doctor and they have the money to go . She just has a hang up. I had to give up , I told her I would be there any time she needed me but a wouldn't talk to her about any negetive problems any more. Good luck to you. Maybe you could get an outsider to come in and talk to her.
2007-01-18 22:49:55 · answer #3 · answered by junebug66 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well you know .... she might very well have clinical depression...I suffer from it myself...life long...but I refuse to give into it...I refuse to consider drugs....but on the other hand I don't have a cheating scum bag for a husband...I am blessed to have a very loving and devoted husband....that is probably what gets me through....I don't think this is going to be something you can determine for your mom....Has she been seen by a Doctor?....You might suggest she try to find someone that does "interactive light therapy"...it was very helpful for me...the key word there is interactive, different from standard light therapy....Good Luck.
2007-01-18 22:21:05 · answer #4 · answered by ticklemeblue 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I am so sorry you have to go through this. Is there an adult in your family (aunt, uncle, grandparent) who you can confide in and possibly help?
2007-01-18 22:25:38 · answer #5 · answered by ? 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Maybe you can talk to her doctor and tell the doctor that you're concerned about your mom. Then, he/she can tell you exactly what's going on. It will put your mind at easy.
2007-01-18 22:20:20 · answer #6 · answered by Cappuccino 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
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2007-01-18 22:17:38 · answer #7 · answered by Samm 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
tell her to pray.
i'll pray for her
i'll pray for you
pray.
2007-01-18 22:46:41 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋