for all these years he wont even move away from his mothers back door i tell him that we need to move away and have our own life and home and he seems like he is scared maybe he dont trust me i dont know(stuck what to do)?
2007-01-18 12:22:27 · 18 answers · asked by vinesbabykate 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Wow, that's a hell of a lot of time to waste on someone.
You see, the way that man is, is the way he will always be. Men are typically commitment-phobes but this guy sounds like he's taking it to a different level.
If you want to wait for him, fine, but you'll be waiting a LOOOONG time!
FP
2007-01-18 12:26:27 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Sorry sweetie, it's time to move on. There is a chance (and I'm not promising anything so don't hope for anything) that this may be the kick in the a$$ he needs to get out of his mommy's house. Why should he change now? He's got two women taking care of him.
DTMFA
Not what you wanted to hear I know, but you want something (commitment, marriage, etc) that he's not willing or capable of giving you.
And even if you do manage to coax him out of his mom's place, he's gonna run to her everytime something doesn't go his way.
Sorry to be the bearer of unpleasant news, but I hope this helps
2007-01-18 12:35:51 · answer #2 · answered by LX V 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He don't have to move in with you and start a life because he is already having his cake and eating it. Why make a commitment when he don't have to and get the same treatment. i was in the same boat. i had to let him know that i wasn't going to let him have it his way and me get the short end of the stick all the time.You tell him to commit, that you are not going to take care of him anymore. Tell him that you love him and you want to be with him, so grow up and be a man or else. I stood up and did this and im married. I only waisted five years on being a butt kisser before i made up my mine to be strong. It worked to
2007-01-18 12:38:03 · answer #3 · answered by peachestommyleasia 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I pretty much have come to believe that it's not that they don't love u or have any feelings for u. It sounds ugly but it's that he is acting well selfish. men are selfish. like no matter the circumstance, he comes first, his wants and needs. that's why after 9 yrs he's still not taking into account your feelings on the issue or has even tried to compromise. for some reason or another it's more convinient to live at his mother's place, so he chooses to stay there.
2007-01-18 12:28:12 · answer #4 · answered by gracy808 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Attend a nearby Non-denominational Church and spend time with some of the members. There should be a few good men there worthy of your time and attention. Hopefully you will find a good Christian man that loves the Lord. He would treat you as you should be treated. Let him know that HIS FATHER will be watching to see that he treats you right! Have a great evening.
Eds
2007-01-18 12:28:25 · answer #5 · answered by Eds 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It's not really nice to say why can't men commit like that cause basicly you're saying that no man can commit which is cruel.
Maybe he is scared, just talk to him about it, see how he feels on the matter.
2007-01-18 12:26:01 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
If he hasn't committed after nine years, he's not going to commit. Maybe it's time you moved on.
2007-01-18 12:26:27 · answer #7 · answered by Nicole B 5 · 2⤊ 0⤋
I guess as far as he's concerned, he is committed. He's been there for all those years. Do you want a commitment from him or to be happy? Sounds like you can't/won't get both.
2007-01-18 12:26:41 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
9 years huh... that's something you needed to have settle about 7-8 years ago. Now he's got no reason to change anything - apparently you don't have that big of a problem with it; you're still there.
2007-01-18 12:27:04 · answer #9 · answered by UNITool 6 · 2⤊ 0⤋
i dont know why he cant commit especially since you have tooken care of him it seems like he would want to i hope it all works out ok.
2007-01-18 12:27:40 · answer #10 · answered by ValleyR 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋