Inquiring about the female mind?

Question

Ok guys the last time I asked this I got reported for a violation - somebody probably thought I was venting frustration or something. So let me start by saying I'm not just ranting or anything, I legitimately want to know this question.

My question is: Why do girls/women always complain about how they can never seem to find a "nice guy" and that there's nobody but jerks around, yet they completely ignore every nice guy that ever asks them out?

Again, I'm not ranting after a rejection or anything, I just seriously want to know and understand this.

Ok thank you to everyone who is encouraging me to keep going and telling me I'll find someone and all that stuff.... but I wasn't asking because I can't find a date. (True, I can't, but I'm ok with that.) I was just asking because my friends do the whole "where are the nice guys" routine all the time and it upsets me that they are passing up tons of actual nice guys, and I don't know how to make them see what they are not seeing.

Answer 1

I will try to explain some of this you can be a nice guy and have women too but there is a fine line between being a nice guy and a dork for instance if you lived in a paradise where everything you wanted was handed to you eventually you would be bored this is what happens to allot of women and men when people always get what they want you don't want to be rude but you don't want them to know how much or how far you will go for them this has been a hard lesson for me also men or women are testing to see what they do and don't want in a relationship there are a few who would love someone like us to know that they would have a best friend but someone who loves their self enough not to be taken for granted we need to offer a challenge with rewards for succeeding those challenges I would recommend David Deangelo's book double your dating hope this helps

Answer 2

It's probably not fair for me to answer this question, but I must say - I'm intrigued. I am 54 and I sure as heck can't find anyone decent. Most of the men that I meet, who are funny, curious, exciting, like to have fun, are younger than me - therefore most men I date are younger. I am often foolish because if you fall in love with one of the young ones - you find yourself playing 'mother' because you find out how insecure or unprepared, immature in the areas you need them to be better in. Still, I don't like older men. Let's say that the law of averages have placed women in a 'lead' position whereby they can 'call some of the shotsl' It's sad, but our society has really confused and muddled the situation. We have many good men serving in Iraq, in jail! Selling drugs to make a living, unschooled, and the ones who are: in school, working, have a life - are either married already, or too young, or too old, or have not been born yet. lol. In my opinion, there is 'jerk' in everybody - male and female - but sometimes, it takes a really seasoned person who is willing to be patient to allow you to 'grow up and out' . Most people don't want to wait. I'll tell you my story. I met a nice guy - fresh out of the joint - had a good family, divorced, wanted something in life and need a new start. I helped him. We became close. His son was my son. My daughter, was his daughter - we were a family. But a monkey got to him - destroyed his job and security, destroyed our home, separated our children, and sent me packing because he consumed my finances, my love and my heart. I had to let go. There are good men out there, but if they don't have their heads on their shoulders and are ready for a stable and good woman - they will use her before they realize. I don't know the difference these days between a 'nice' guy and a 'jerk'. There's a little bit of both in every man and every woman. It all depends on if the person is ready for a real, true realationship and wants to work at it. Working to get to perfection - takes time. Now - I'd rather be alone. I can have more fun.

Answer 3

I really don't know the answer to this one. I would love to find a nice guy. I guess maybe most girls/women are not appreciative or think there isn't really a difference. There is a huge difference. Maybe some girls/women think that is all they are good enough for after being hurt by a bad guy.
There really aren't alot of "nice guys" out there that are single. The only ones that I know are married. Also, girls/women also think a "bad guy" is more fun and challenging I suppose. Yes girls like to have fun, but most of us prefer to know 100% whole heartedly that our partner is true.

Answer 4

I may have an answer for you. Chics are ******* stupid. I know this, because, I am one. Women are very passionate, and persuaded sometimes to get involved with the "adventure" of being involved with the "bad boy". Women are also very devious and conniving, which also falls into this pattern. Someone they think that at the time, they can protect them at all costs, because, you know, the "bad boys" give off the persona as such. But in the end, when the women that fall for this charade, either..A: Realize what an asshole they are with and split...B: stick around...C: stick around and FINALLY split...D:Never leave, and become, one day miserable sacks of worm food. I happen to be under the category as C. They ones that survive this horrible mind ****, happen to somehow understand the good ones are watching them get screwed, and still waiting. Be patient. After all, we have to be patient with you, as well.

Answer 5

A lot of it has to do with youth and Hollywood.
When you are young, you have your whole life ahead of you and aren't really thinking about who you want to rock on the front porch with you when you're old and grey.
So, some chicks choose to be a bit superficial and only go out with the hotties and the jocks--just wanting some arm candy--not much different from guys, really.
Hollywood has the youth thinking that if you aren't perfectly buffed you're a loser.
I wish girls would give the guys who aren't perfect more chances.
Those are the guys who will hold you when you wake up from a nightmare...
those are the guys who remember to bring you flowers because they want to ...
Those are the guys who make great husbands and fathers.
How do I know? I married one!!

Answer 6

I think girls who say/do that don't really want the nice guys... I think they're attracted to the "bad boy" type and then get upset when the guy screws them over... then they complain about how there are no nice guys, but what they mean is there is no "bad boy" type that treats them right... that's just what I think, I don't know for sure, because I'm not that type of girl.

Answer 7

I am a girl and I sure can answer you question for you because I use to be one of those girls.....
>>>>>well the reason why I use to think that there are no nice guys out there but jerks...... I was very picky and stubborn and would always think to myself that no guy would be good enough for me because how popular I was and etc........I also thought that guys where always heading or wanting one thing in a relationship which is to sleep with us. (sex)...but I guess I was wrong .......and because of past bad relationship of beeing hurt by some jerk, any other guy was a jerk to me . We (girls) ofter make or think that the next guy who would ask me out should suffer and would always be a jerk to us.
>>>> it's more of a personal thing for girls but as for me, I had to tell and force myself that the next guy I meet (my husband) can be a nice guy...

>>> I hope I answer your question for you and I am only 19 so it was like yesterday I use to do those things.....good luck

Answer 8

Nothing turns a woman off more than a guy who can't get a date for whatever reason. The "nice guys" who can get a date and are attractive to women GO OUT WITH WOMEN AND ARE SUCCESSFUL.

But there is a large number of guys who are unattractive to women who are also "nice guys". Maybe they are fat, maybe they are timid, maybe they hang out in circles with weirdos. The women don't want to date these "nice guys" they want to date "nice guys" that they're attracted to.

Once a woman decides you are not attractive enough to them to be datable, it doesn't matter if you are a nice guy, you're not getting a date, period!

Answer 9

I can only speak for myself when I say that I'm looking at the total package. A nice guy is very important but he also must be truly confident, goal oriented, intelligent, interesting and attractive (to me).

You should probably stop blaming your lack of dates on you being a nice guy and work on some of the other aspects.of your personality. You may also check how you dress, present yourself, do your hair and, of course, your breath.

Answer 10

They don't look for nice guys until their 20's once they realize they have got a guy who isn't nice. Also , being a nice guy I can say this, nice guys by nature, don't disrespect women, they don't think of women as a sexual conquest,all the things that are different from others