Should someone be allowed to continue going to church if they've molested children- and won't ask forgiveness?

Question

My grandfather serially molested and abused myself and most of my cousins and siblings over the course of our childhood, raping several of us. This has all come out only recently (long story), and all we ever wanted was for him to apologize and ask forgiveness. We never intended to press charges (we were told by an attorney that it would be a wast of time) or ask for money or anything, what's done is done, just a simple act of asking to be forgiven. Not only has he refused to do this, but he refuses to admit what happened. My cousins contacted his church minister and met with him to discuss the matter, hoping he could talk some sense into him. There is a good chance he will be dismissed from the church, which he's attended for 20 years, which I feel a tiny bit bad about but is it right for someone who did what he did and refuses to ask forgiveness to still attend church? At the very least, don't the others at his church deserve to know (especially those with small children?)

Answer 1

Matthew 18:15ff makes it quite clear:

"If your brother sins against you, go and confront him while the two of you are alone. If he listens to you, you have won back your brother. But if he doesn't listen, take one or two others with you so that 'every word may be confirmed by the testimony of two or three witnesses.' If, however, he ignores them, tell it to the congregation. If he also ignores the congregation, regard him as a Gentile and a tax collector."

Paul reinforces this idea in I Corinthians 5:4-5:

"When you are gathered together in the name of our Lord Jesus and my spirit and the power of our Lord Jesus are present, hand this man over to Satan for the destruction of his flesh, so that his spirit may be saved on the Day of the Lord."

Answer 2

I dont know really but i think it depends on the church - a friend of mine her Mum was "kicked out of membership" because her new boyfriend moved in with her. I think that was kinda rude but then again i don't.

Ultimately, what he has done is wrong in the eyes of the law and the eyes of God, ok so you have decided not to press charges now, but on Judgement Day your Grandad will stand in front of God and God will deal out the punishment - if you get me. At least by talking to the minister, he is warned what has happened in the past and can keep up eye open for any funny behaviour if you get me

Answer 3

Oh, how awful!!! I think they can still go to church, unless the court orders them not to (be around children). My sister goes to a huge church, and they have a special "sex offender" section, up front where they can keep an eye on them. Kinda makes me feel creepy thinking about that, God bless you, I have been a victim, but it was a stranger, I could not imagine continuing a relationship of any kind with someone who had molested/raped me, I really cannot.

Answer 4

there are purely 2 present day worldwide leaders that answer to no person,Fidel Castro and the Pope,Cubans hate Fidel and his government,so why do not catholics hate the pope and his pedophile monks? because of the fact curiously god is on his element,and if god is on his element there is not any threat that the church has executed any incorrect,the church is often spectacular you be attentive to,i've got self belief that with a worldwide huge scarcity of priest,they only won't be able to have the money for to lose any in large multitude,whilst i bypass to hell,I actually have a nagging suspicion that some if not all of those unwell f*cks would be conserving me business enterprise,I purely wish they drown slowly interior the seven rivers of hell

Answer 5

of course the people of the church should be aware of this problem that he has. christian church is not a place for perfect people to go, in fact if you are a christian then it is your belief that nobody is perfect except for jesus. if he continues to molest people in the church then he should and probably will be punished for his actions because people that dont know him will not put up with his crap. so basically the answer to your question is: yes he should be allowed to go to church even if he refuses to publicly admit his sins, i guarantee that 90 percent of the people attending the church have some sort of sick twisted thing that they have thought or done...sin is sin in the eyes of the christian god so he is just as clean and forgiven as you are if he confesses that jesus christ is his lord and savior.

Answer 6

I can't be certain on WHERE, although it may in fact be 1 Cor 5, but Paul preaches to the churches of his time to expel any wicked person from the church. 1 Cor 5:2 says "And you are proud! Shouldn't you rather have been filled with grief and have put out of your fellowship the man who did this." But he writes in response in 2 Cor 2:6, he writes "The punishment inflicted on him by the majority is sufficient for him."

The general idea is that if they are unrepentant, they should be expelled from the church, but the church should forgive them, and if he repents welcome him back.

Answer 7

I believe in God but I do not attend church cause I believe that more than 50% of the people that go are hypocrites! and don't seek his apology would you truly value it if it comes from a man like that? move on with your life it is not worth it for you to give him the time of day! and as to church he is only one in a million attending and acting as if they deserve to be there.

Answer 8

:
1 Cor 5:9-13
I wrote unto you in an epistle not to company with fornicators:

10 Yet not altogether with the fornicators of this world, or with the covetous, or extortioners, or with idolaters; for then must ye needs go out of the world.

11 But now I have written unto you not to keep company, if any man that is called a brother be a fornicator, or covetous, or an idolater, or a railer, or a drunkard, or an extortioner; with such an one no not to eat.

12 For what have I to do to judge them also that are without? do not ye judge them that are within?

13 But them that are without God judgeth. Therefore put away from among yourselves that wicked person.
:
1 Cor 6:2-3
Do ye not know that the saints shall judge the world? and if the world shall be judged by you, are ye unworthy to judge the smallest matters?

3 Know ye not that we shall judge angels? how much more things that pertain to this life?

Answer 9

I see nothing wrong with him being dismissed from his church. He's refusing to admit to and atone for a horrendous sin. I think a lot more should happen to him than just being dismissed from his church and asking for forgiveness. However, don't feel guilty about his situation. It's his fault and his alone.

Answer 10

i have to say if a person molests someone else they belong in a prison cell. one of my ex girlfriend's was molested and raped by her father for 13 years before she told anyone of it. she also asked her father for forgiveness but i could never figure out why would you ask your grandfather for forgiveness? you are the victim hes the criminal and not to mention the fact that church doesnt care if you are raped or molested since the priesthood and the bible speak of it as it is ok to do. but you need to understand you can not ask someone for forgiveness based on your religion or creeds. and please keep in mind "you are the victim" he is the criminal and he will burn in hell for such a act as well mark the word of a real god on that one