My cousin does nothing but root for me to Fail. How do I deal with him:?

Question

HELP! my cousin has been routing for me to fail. He thrives off of my misfortune. How do I deal?
I feel bad because I pulled out of Grad. school so he'll probably see me as a failure even though I pulled out because I decided It wasn't for me!!! He is always trying to put himself up at my expense. Thing is...he is a doctor and is 10 years older than me....so I just don't get this? He is so quick to judge and Label! He will put everyone down! Why can't he just be happy for me?
Now I'm doing something I love by the way!

Answer 1

Why are you worried about what someone else thinks? What other people think and say are none of your business. Why take it upon yourself to give other people's thought or words any weight at all?

Look, people put other people down because THEY don't feel good about themselves. They are insecure. They don't want anyone to appear better than them.

Simply because a person has a particular label in society (doctor, lawyer, president, prime minister, etc.) doesn't make them smarter or better then you--only different. Remember, a formal education doesn't make you smart--it only makes you an educated idiot. That's not to say that many uneducated people aren't stupid, but there's the misconception in society that if you have a degree that makes you smarter and better and bigger than others. Not so.

Your cousin is probably one in a long stream of people who have affected your perceived self-worth. When anyone shares things that you don't like, get in the habit of thanking them (verbally or silently) and recognizing that you know what's best for you. Success and failure are only words. YOUR self-talk (words) are more powerful than theirs. Use YOUR self-talk to push yourself to do your best in what YOU choose to do.

Train yourself in your chosen profession. Educate yourself in the ways of the world, and be the best person you can be. THAT is success!

Answer 2

For him to do this he is insecure with something about his own self. If you pick back and get the right thing he will leave you alone. Does he not really like his work or or did someone like his dad have to help him through his studies? Hit him up if you are really happy about him being "successful at being unhappy". He is so unhappy about his life that he has to drag other down with him. Do this in front of other people. He can buy what he wants but not happiness! Keep on him hard in front of others enough that they believe what you are saying. Did his daddy have to give out a few favors to get him through school. You do not say the kind of doctor. Pick out a few of the worst things this kind of a doctor does and ask how he likes doing them. How many colonostomies did you give this week? Check how many guys for hemroids? Just blow up at him. Get a few more ideas to get him about from others.

Answer 3

I understand what you are going through. My cousin also enjoys pointing out my failures and downplaying my successes like they are nothing. It is hard because you feel like they should support you and feel happy for you, but they always make you feel horrible about yourself, even if you are a beautiful, smart, and successful person. I learned that the constant abuse that I was getting from my cousin was not worth the pain I was putting myself through just because I didn't want to start any problems because she is my cousin. I can't tell you what to do about your cousin and the situation, but in my case, I had to learn to not let her bother me anymore. I finally realized that I had to stop listening to her and now I feel happier and healthier than I ever have before. I hope you find a good solution to your problem and I hope that my experiences have helped you. No matter what, always remember what a great person you are, and if you are happy with your life, than what he thinks shouldn't matter; remember, it is your life, not his!

Answer 4

The trick is to understand that someone else's problem with you is just that - someone else's problem, not yours.

Some people just have a need to feel superior to everyone else. Some people are scared of people who are a bit different, as well, but from your description, the former is the more likely explanation.

Hey, you're doing something that makes you happy, and that's the most important thing of all. Just ignore his comments.

Answer 5

Wow he sounds pretty insecure. Do you need to spend time with him? I'd avoid him like the Plague if he were my cousin, but then I rarely see any of my cousins anyway. You might even go so far as to talk to people in your family and tell them you want to put some distance between yourself and your dear cousin, and you'd prefer to not attend events he will be at very often.

Or if it works, you could just start a rivalry about how you love your job more than he loves his!

Answer 6

Maybe on the inside, he's not happy with his own self. He's probably trying to bring you down because he has his own problems. Even though hes a doctor that makes a bunch of money, life still isn't perfect.

Answer 7

He can only feel go by putting people down. It has nothing to do with you. the way to overcome this is to bless him for he is a fool and will ultimately fail.

he is empty inside and is trying to justify himself by acting like he is better than others just remember he is lost and his opinion is worthless

Answer 8

Tell him to leave you alone. He obviously has his own issues and is taking them out on you. And maybe tell him until he learns to stop putting others down you don't want anything to do with him. I hate to say it but sometimes you need to do the tough love kinda thing. You deserve more than what he is saying to you!

Answer 9

He is obviously insecure and has issues with his own life and feels the need to take them out on you. You need to sit down and talk to him. Let him know how you feel, and if he keeps giving you a hard time,ignore him.

Answer 10

just ignore him
when he sees that you dont care what he thinks he'll start picking on someone else