I'm 18, and I work with this girl(she's 18 too). I've known her since the 6th grade, but I've just started getting feelings for her. I've told her how I've felt and she says that she loves me too. But she still stays with her boyfriend. It sucks because now she won't even talk to me. I've thought upon this night after night. It's been depressing me a little each time I do. I could use some help on this. Her friend told me to just sit back and wait it out and that if we were meant for each other, it'll happen.
Thanks
2007-01-18 10:05:43 · 18 answers · asked by ViperPilot 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
All you can do after you've let your feelings be known is to sit back and let things progress naturally. She may love you but she's also in a commited realtioship and she must love him to if she's willing to make a commitment to him. It's okay to have feelings for her but you need to understand having feelings is not enough to have a relationship with someone. Sometimes its all about timing and for you it's just not the right time. Give her some space and allow her to choose to be with you. Everything that is meant to be has a way of working out. If she's not the one for you another girl will come along eventually, believe me. Don't sit at home being sad about something that is out of your control. You can't force her to love and make a commitment to you. It shows she has a strong, honest character if she respects her commitments. Plus you never want to convince someone to be with you. They should willingly open their heart with no reservations.
2007-01-18 10:12:50 · answer #1 · answered by Bonita Applebaum 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It's hard giving the best advice for situations like these without knowing the girl or her personality. Everybody is different and she might not even necessarily being doing it to have both you and her boyfriend's attention. She might just be confused because she could be feeling guilty or obligated to stay with her boyfriend. That might be why she is avoiding speaking to you. She might be feeling that she is betraying her boyfriend. Her friend told you to wait but honestly women love the lengths men will go to prove they love them. Women eat up romance. I think you should give it an all out assault with all the emotions you hold for her but than if she is still indecisive tell her that you're not going to wait forever for her. You have a life to live and pining away for one person for a long time could potentially ruin an opportunity for you finding another girl that you could really love as well. I say it's okay to passionately pursue her but know when to cut your losses. If she can't make up her mind about what she really wants then than ask yourself is that someone you really want to be with? I know it's hard but think with your head and not your heart.
2007-01-18 10:52:50 · answer #2 · answered by monkeydoodie 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Her friend is right. If its meant to be it will be. Apparently she feels trapped with this other guy, why would she just cut off her relationship with you due to having a boyfriend? Or perhaps she holds a lot of respect for her boyfriend and doesn't want to risk messing it up by slipping up and cheating. Happens to the best of us man ... you'll be okay. Don't let it get you down! Good luck .. and if you guys really love each other ... she'll come around!
2007-01-18 10:10:03 · answer #3 · answered by msdrdn 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It will happen if it was meant to be. U also have to remember it isnt just the easiest thing to just break up with your boyfriend. Im sure she is waiting for the right time to do it. u got to look at through her eyes. it is scary to leave someone u r used to and just jump right into a new relationship. stay friends and wait for her. It will work out.
2007-01-18 10:15:21 · answer #4 · answered by aspen 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I agree with the friend you should step back and wait. And obviously she really does love you and see you as a threat to the relationship because she wouldn't have stop talking to u. They say friends make the best lovers. Be patient if it was meant to be it will be don't do something to push her away because then u will never know if it was meant.
2007-01-26 01:56:41 · answer #5 · answered by wet t 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You are 18. Go for it. The only hesitation is if you are going to make things awkward at work, but if she is already not talking to you then what have you got to lose. Be honest, tell her you are thinking about it, tell her that you want to be honest.
If she stays with her boyfriend, then move on. You never know who you are missing while you are dreaming about her.
2007-01-18 10:17:04 · answer #6 · answered by Ang H 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
This friend is right. She's probably not talking to you because of her feelings for you. This has kind of put her in a tough place. She's thinking about you and then she has to go home to him. It's natural for you to have feelings for her because you've seen her blossom and you probably really appreciate her and accept her for who she really is. This is the perfect time for you to throw yourself into your hobbies. But if two weeks has gone by and she hasn't said anything to you, please get ready to move on with your life. Usually people come around when they see you've moved on. Sad but sooooo true! Good luck
2007-01-18 10:11:35 · answer #7 · answered by ksfinney17 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
yea just wait out an see what happens. She may be confused about her feelings for both of you.She has to make up her mind cant have the cake and eat it too,someone is bound to get hurt.
2007-01-26 02:04:49 · answer #8 · answered by canteloupesweet 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Just give her time and space, maybe she doesn't know what to do either, everything happens for a reason, and if you two should be together it'll happen soon enough.
2007-01-18 10:09:01 · answer #9 · answered by lovelylittlelady 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
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2016-11-25 02:06:53 · answer #10 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋