I told a girl that I like her a "whole lot", but I cannot date her right now. I gave her the reasons, and she said we can "still share a good friendship". After this, we suddenly became very good friends, and she came to know my deepest secrets. Now, I told her I was wrong and we needed to talk. I want to date her, but she is really nervous around me again. Why is she nervous? What may she want?
2007-01-18 08:10:09 · 11 answers · asked by +TheEndIsInSight+ 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
To be your good friend, and that's all.
2007-01-18 08:13:21 · answer #1 · answered by crazylegs 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You aren't harmless anymore. You have become a danger. The rules change between friendship and dating. Friendship can last a lifetime. Dating, on the other hand, must either grow or self destruct. You can date for a lifetime but it is a friendship, sometimes with benefits, but a friendship never the less.
I have two women friends. They are invaluable to me as friends (No benefits) and I would never ask either of them to go beyond that friendship tier.
If you want a friend, you have one, it you want to gamble for all the marbles that's OK too. Just understand, the odds of returning to a friendship after progressing onto the dating tier are very long indeed.
Good luck, and think about your choice, it could very easily be a life changing decision.
2007-01-18 17:16:32 · answer #2 · answered by gimpalomg 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think she's nervous because of what could happen. It's scary getting into a relationship and what may happen. Good things can come of it but there's always those things that can go wrong, like heart break. Being friends is more safe than dating. I've been dating my boyfriend for 3 years and I still get nervous around him. I think you should just go for it and start dating if you really like her.
2007-01-18 16:18:44 · answer #3 · answered by faeb15 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Afraid of the same dissapointment, rejection, and "end" of a closer relationship, such as what just happened.
it is a big breech of trust and intimacy when someone rejects you- so to take that person back, trusting they will actually "stay" with you this time, is an iffy thing......
She may just want to spend more time with you before allowing a closer relationship- to wait and see how well you can get along, and whether the intimacy just "follows" and "happens" after a bit of time together.
She may be scared that if things move too quickly, you'll be scared by the relationship, adn once again have "reasons" why you shouldnt be seeing her....
2007-01-18 16:16:30 · answer #4 · answered by Yentl 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Wow...this sounds like my situation, and I'm the girl. She's nervous because she doesn't know if you'll change your mind again. Rejection hurts, and just because you've become good friends doesn't entirely take the sting away. No one likes to be set up for repeat disappointment. You may have to take time to show her you are serious, that you were wrong and explain why you feel this way now. Good luck to you!
2007-01-18 16:16:21 · answer #5 · answered by Greenteagirl 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you guys probably became closer because the pressure was off----u told her how you felt and she said she wanted to be good friends....maybe she is a little nervous because she doesnt know where u really stand----u said 2 different things to her...maybe she is a little confused---or maybe she likes another boy? anyway u seem to have an open and honest friendship w/ her---so I would just ask her about it. good luck
2007-01-18 16:15:13 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
She may be nervous about those deep dark secrets you told her that might have changed her impression of you altogether. OR
She is nervous about having you as her boyfriend. Nervous could be misinterpreted for excited and interested in you.
2007-01-18 16:18:58 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
shes scared you're gonna back out again & might change your mind. shes probably very vulnerable.. or she just likes the fact that you guys are in a good relationship as friends and she doesnt want to ruin it. why dont you just tell her how you really feel and ask her how she feels
2007-01-18 16:14:45 · answer #8 · answered by Riley 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
well if she is really nervous around you she likes you
2007-01-18 16:16:25 · answer #9 · answered by nat~nat 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
no one can answer that question but her!! so talk to her and maybe youll get a lot farther than you are in this relationship
2007-01-18 16:15:27 · answer #10 · answered by kayybugggs 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋