Am I wrong for doing this????

Question

My son just woke up from his nap, I put him in his highchair in the kitchen and was giving him his snack while I swept the floor and what not. He was smiling and laughing and then out of nowhere just started screaming I mean not crying or anything and not even mad just screaming like if you or I were to scream at the top of our lungs. He just kept doing it ( he is 14 months old by the way ) I kept saying no and told him to eat his snack and he would just smile and scream again, this is nothing new to him he has known how to scream for a while now. I kept saying no to him saying no more screaming and he would just keep smiling and do it again, when he usually does something that I tell him no to repeatedly I put him in his room for about 10 minutes and then he is fine. For the last few days I have been on edge with everything and I just lost my cool and put him in his room to sit because the screaming was agitating me. Am I wrong for doing this????

** SERIOUS ANSWERS ONLY **

Please do not think I was going to hurt my child. I would NEVER do that no matter how agitated I got. I simply was not going to put up with it after he did it for 15 minutes with me trying to distract him in any which way possible.

I talk and interact with my son all the time, he doesn't only hear me say no except for when he is doing something he shouldn't be doing. We read books together and I did try singing him a song and talking to him nothing worked that is why I placed him in his room for a little while.

IM SO FLATTERED I HAVE AN ADMIRER THAT JUST WON'T GO AWAY LOL OH WELL. IM OVER IT LOL <><> TO HOT TO HANDLE LMFAO

Answer 1

No, if you just let him do it he would just get worse. You're showing him that certain behaviors get certain reactions. He needs to understand that no means no.

Answer 2

Try ignoring, by walking into another room or just carrying on with your own tasks Use calming techniques to lower your own stress levels – deep breathing, relaxing your muscles, positive talk inside your head: ‘I will keep calm’. If ignoring hasn’t worked, then you need to redirect or distract him. Redirecting him like putting him into a different room is good but 5 minutes would have been better. He is only 14 months old. He likes your reaction and is pleased about it. It has nothing to do with misbehaving or manipulation. He is testing his importance in his world and realizes he can do it by screaming. This is what young toddlers do. The more you ignore behavior that you don't want, the less he will do this. You should check out the babycenter.com for milestones and development stages. This way you know what to expect at certain ages.

Answer 3

He's pushing your buttons. He likes to get a rise out of you, not because he likes to make you made, but because he's getting a reaction. I know you say you say no repeatedly, but what about ignoring it a couple times. Don't even look up from your sweeping or dishes or whatever and see how long the fun lasts :) Or, what about not going to the highchair after nap. Maybe play before you give his snack and change up his routine just a little. You did the right thing by giving each of you some time and space. Keep up the good work!

Answer 4

Not at all. I'm a nanny and the 14 month old I watch (really, the same age, but a girl, maybe it is the age) does this all the time. Her diaper is clean, she is well fed, and not ill, She just screams at the top of her lungs for no reason. I do the same thing you do. Sometimes I put her in her crib, sometimes I just shut the door to her room. I feel bad, but she does what your son does: smiles at me in that defiant way that annoys me. I feel that if you hit your son or yelled at him, that would be wrong, but you did what I do. I separate myself from the child when she does this to let her know I don't approve, but I don't loose controll. I think you did just the right thing.Congrats on not slapping or screaming. Good luck.

Answer 5

That is a fine way to handle the situation. You are letting him know that the screaming is an inappropriate way to act, and if you put him in a safe place he is fine. This is just one of the many ways that will help you set limits and let him know that this is not ok.

You have said that you play with him, and would never hurt him so I am not even going to go there. You should know that it is healthy for him to see you doing things around the house and hopefully it will help him to find ways to entertain himself. Another thing to try would be to find a few chores that you do around the house like sweeping, and get him a kid sized broom and ask him to help you! It couls curb the screaming and turn into a game!

Answer 6

It must be in the air my son will be 2 in a few weeks and for the past few days it's like walking on egg shells with him last night he screams for no reason what so ever. So I understand what you are going through and I do the exact same thing. If he feels the need to scream and throw a fit for no reason than he can do it in his room. I just shut the door and tell him when he is ready to come out then he will stop throwing fits and screaming. Good Luck and have patients!

Answer 7

Honestly, if you can stand it next time, I would try ignoring the scream completely. It sounds like he is liking the reaction from you, even if it is negative. Next time, try completely ignoring his scream - don't even look up from what you are doing. Pretend like you can't hear anything, and then start giving him lots of attention when he stops and moves on to something else. I think he will get bored VERY quickly.
If this doesn't work, very calmly, without saying ANYTHING, pick him up mid-scream and put him in his room for a time-out. One year old children should only get one minute time-outs - anything else is a little too long for them to understand. When time-out is over, explain why he was placed there.

Answer 8

I have many times put a child in his room or in his bed because I just could not handle it any more!! You are doing fine. Its hard to live with the screaming especially when nothing is wrong. That is what my doc told me to do when I was at my wits end. He said the child is safe and mom has time to take a few deep breaths and get control. Good job Mom!!!

Answer 9

May want to find out why he's screaming. Is it that he's scared of something, lonely or just testing you. If he's trying to push your buttons don't put up with it but if something is agitating him try to discover what it is an remove it.

I'd say call up a pediatrician and just ask. It may just be boredom if it is leave him some toys to play with or a mirror across the room to look at. babies can entertain themselves with mirrors for awhile.

Sounds like you're doing fine but babies sometimes do things for a reason that makes no sense to us grown ups.

Answer 10

the 'no' cycle sounds like it would turn into a power struggle to me. Instead of getting caught up in it...turn the radio on loud and dance with him, or sing a silly song and get his attention. When my daughter sees me doing that she usually drops the yelling and wants to join it. Distraction is the best thing at this young age...they don't reason. Ten minutes is way to long for a child who is one minute old.

Maybe he's just trying to communicate, he's too little to know that it's not appropriate to scream to him it's just another way to interact. So play with him on different voices. My 14 month old cracks me up when she tries to mimic my whisper.

Of course, if you thought you were going to lose it and hurt him, then it would be better than abusing. But at that point look at therapy. It will get worse, especially once he does figure out how to push your button like that!

Answer 11

As a father of 2 kids and I will say your 14 month old does this cause he knows it gets to you and he thinks it's a game and fun to pick on mommy...if putting him the room does not work maybe something else to get his mind in a another direction....
Are you wrong from putting him in his room and walk away...no
There has been a few parents who did not do that and end up hurting thier kids..So walking away and giving your self a break is ok...