Even though I am in a relationship or have been in relationships since these past relationships I still have feelings for certain guys that I had sex with and gone out with. Some I never had sex with or seen him naked, never dreamed of it. I still find myself thinking of these guys, and dreaming about them sometimes. I've tried to tell them in the past that I still have feelings for them, some I have just let go...some are harder than others. This one has a smile that makes me melt, and if he were to show up any day of the year and ask me to do something I would most likely do it. One of them I wanted to have his kids and I gave up sex because he didn't want to have sex until he was married, I was with him for 3 yrs, that was a long time with no sex...for someone that was just introduced to it and wanted to know more. The last one I thought that I was over him, I went out with back in middle school. He had came to my b/fs' house one night and asked me to leave with him, but I didn't.
2007-01-18 07:15:51 · 11 answers · asked by Tigerlover 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
I wonder what would have happened if I had gone...would we be together...would we have slept together...what would have happened? He told me something and I will never forget it...He came to find me that night to tell me that he still loved me.
2007-01-18 07:18:04 · update #1
You'll ALWAYS have feelings for your old loves. They're called "memories." Maybe even treasured memories. You should never let them go, they're part of who you are, what made you the way you are today.
And at the same time... they're in the past. If those memories are keeping you from pursuing something now, then you need to find balance. One of the ways I have always balanced memories of past loves is to remind myself that we broke up for a reason, but we were together for a reason as well.
So there's something about each person you've loved that will always stir you inside, but you also need to develop the maturity to recognize that you have a choice in these matters. That is, you can't always choose your feelings, but you can choose how you react to them. And it's your reactions that give you the life you have today.
Living your life in a way that gives you something rich, deep and satisfying is the way to put the past in the past. Ask yourself what you can do to make the relationship you're in now better, richer, more fulfilling, then act on that. You'll find that having a warm and satisfying life in the present is the best way to keep those happy memories in the past.
2007-01-18 07:31:01 · answer #1 · answered by Scott F 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
your mind sounds like it's all over the place. I'd take a few breaths now and then, and just breathe. Take a hot bath, I'm serious. Love is painful, and when you've gone out with people it is understandable to still have feelings for them. But you can't just hide them. Be honest with the guys, listen to your heart, and it will tell you which one is right for you. And it isn't just about getting in bed with a guy. It's so much more than that. Someone where you can't stand being without, makes you laugh and smile, and understands you, on what eveer you feel or choose to live your life. There hard to find, but I do believe there is love like that out there somewhere.
2007-01-18 07:24:05 · answer #2 · answered by All I need is you 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You are not ready for any relationship. Sex is not a toy to play around just any guy. The guy that wanted to wait
until he got married was a perfect one to have a relationship with.
My advice don't settle down to one boy until you have the feelings strictly for him and you don't have feelings for the others even though you may think of them occasionly. AND DEFINITLY LEAVE THE SEX ALONE until married
2007-01-18 07:26:40 · answer #3 · answered by mamayer6 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No. It sounds like you have an overactive imagination like me... what if this, what if that... etc. You will drive yourself mad like this.
Tell yourself everything happens for a reason & that you will be led to meet the one you are supposed to marry. Right now you are stuck in a nostalgic comfort zone. It will pass. You will have fond memories and that's ok & that's where they should stay. If you keep looking backward, you may be missing opportunities right in front of you!
2007-01-18 07:26:59 · answer #4 · answered by CoronaGirl 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It sounds to me like you haven't found what you are looking for yet. Clearly you need something your current relationship isn't providing. However I doubt the old relationships would provide whatever it was either. If there were so good you would still be together after all.
2007-01-18 07:21:14 · answer #5 · answered by gerrifriend 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well if you had some kind of connection...of course that you feel something when you see them...but don't get too obssesed with your past...live your present and enjoy in your partners arms.
2007-01-18 07:20:54 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Unfortunately, many of us had chance to do what we failed to to in life. Don't look back,,,look forward, armed with the knowledge you have gained from that experieince. If you see the person and you and that person are unattached, you can speak to him/her. Oherwise, keep on trucking!
2007-01-18 07:20:07 · answer #7 · answered by demilspencer@yahoo.com 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
its only wrong if they treated u bad or if u treated him bad, so no its ok to have feleings for them, just dont act on them , because old flames of resentment will flare up and burn you both
'ave a nice dey mon
2007-01-18 07:22:56 · answer #8 · answered by ? 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I to also miss my ex. But i miss her more becuase of the sexaul connection we had. Dang i miss that along with otehr stuff. :(
2007-01-18 07:31:49 · answer #9 · answered by CHURRO 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
One can't control one's feelings, it's what one does with them that counts
2007-01-18 07:41:25 · answer #10 · answered by Patrick Bateman 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋