I have a niece 19 yr old who lives with her 22 yr old boyfriend, which she adores so much and thinks this guy is the right person for her. The boyfriend is not so eager to look for "good jobs", because he knows my niece will take care of him, irregardless. What is the best approach to my niece to let her know that this guy is not the right person for her and to make her know that focusing on her college or whatever vocational schooling is best for her, so she can land into better paying jobs. She does odds jobs here and there, too. Everytime, we tell her these, she gets upset and be rebellious to all. Her parents are separated and she is close by her mother, which she doesn't respect at all.
2007-01-18 06:51:32 · 8 answers · asked by light1 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
SHe is going to have to get fed up with him on her own. I don't think there really is anything you can say to her to make her change her mind about him. She will wake up one day.
2007-01-18 06:57:20 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
There is nothing you can do but back off and tell her that you are there for her if she needs you. The more you pressure her the more she'll rebel. Let her fall on her *** a few times with the bf and after a few experiences she'll know better. Some people learn the easy way some learn the hard way and your niece sounds like she needs a good kick in the *** from life to know what to do.
2007-01-18 14:57:26 · answer #2 · answered by Michael K 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Nothing you can do but let her face the consequences of her own mistakes. Don't give her money or bail her out of her jams. Don't condone her shacking up by having the boyfriend around or visiting her there. I'd be inclined to live my own busy, interesting life and let her sit around with her loser. Start shrugging your shoulders and smiling, saying "It's your life". She's legally an adult, and I'm sure she knows much more than anyone else, right? So let her live her life.
2007-01-18 14:57:59 · answer #3 · answered by Violet Pearl 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Stay out of it and let her learn from her mistakes, really its the only way , because the more you try to tell her whats right the more she will rebel. when the time comes that he moves on to bigger and better she will come running looking for someone to heal her heart. then you can tell her you told her so.
2007-01-18 15:00:03 · answer #4 · answered by sissy 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Lisson to her when she needs you.I think the only person that can really help would be her mom but if the child has no respect she's messed up and the mom is more messed up for not demanding respect.
2007-01-18 14:58:16 · answer #5 · answered by Dawn l 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Life will be her best teacher. Sometimes people gotta learn things the hard way.
2007-01-18 16:04:16 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
let her live and learn... she will figure it out sooner or later.... remember when you were that age... people couldn't tell us anything either we had to figure it out on our own. some harder lesson then others
2007-01-18 14:57:50 · answer #7 · answered by panda 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
she needs love and attention
2007-01-18 14:55:20 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋