can anyone help me?

Question

i am 18 and i have had this problem since i was 13 i am a self mutilator. i am still in highschool and have been ostrasized my whole life. iby my family to. i am a large person and have been picked on my whole life why do guys not like large girls and i have been told i am ugly stupid etc by everyone even by my family so i started cutting i ahve attempted suicide 3 times hospitilized twice and they all tell me the same thing u r crazy im not though i do it for releif i dont know what else to do i ahve no one to love me i have no friends and i cant stop it what is wrong with me can anyone help me stop my bad habbits?

Answer 1

Ashley,
Hi There.........I'm a 40 year old man who is a very caring and smart person. I've seen alot of problems in life with people!
The best thing you need to do, as soon as possible, is to get into your family doctor and tell him everything about what's been going on in your life. He will then recommend a therapist to help you get your life back on track. This is going to be a long process of recovery. Without going into alot of detail, it sounds like you have become a victim of the superficial world we live in. Please see your doctor as soon as possible. Take care!!!

Answer 2

As you may have noticed from the more intelligent posts, you are not the only one who feels this way

You definitely need to get or continue psychological counselling, and hwile I normally don't like it, medication may help you get your feet under you long enough to really deal with your problems.

A couple of suggestions that may help:

For feeling ugly:
Take down the mirrors in your house if you can't, if you can't try not to look at them. Until you can change your mindset looking in a mirror will only reinforce your current feelings.

If you can afford it, getting a regular massage is a good way to get to know the good side of your body, because when your body feels good, you feel good about it. A massage also releases endorphins which make you feel better. If you can't afford a regular massage, try doing something each day that makes you feel good physically, sit out in the sun, take a hot shower, roll yourself in a soft blanket, and focus on that good feeling.

For feeling stupid:
Pick two activities, one creative, one physical, to start doing regularly. Things that aren't easy, but aren't extremely difficult. Track your progress on the physical activity, there is very little like the feeling of shaving time off your mile run, finally managing to finish ten push-ups (it took me five years, but I by God did it!), or reaching the top of a cliff.

Find a group of people involved in the creative activity, join a theater group, sign up with an online poetry forum, take a sculpting class. You'll find people who are glad to give advise, and will give honest compliments for the work you do.

To find people who value you:
Volunteer. I have never found or heard of anything that will make you feel better about yourself then helping other people. Hospitals, animal shelters, homeless shelters and many other organizations are always looking for help, and many people there will tell you how much your help means to them.

If no one you know values you, it's time to get some new friends, (try that pottery class, or acting group).

For an all around pick-me-up and reason to keep living:
If you can afford it, get a pet. Not a fish or lizard. Similar to volunteering, but with a personal relationship that volunteering may not give you. A dog will be glad to give you the love you need, and while a cat will not be as obvious about it they will let you know they care in their own way. And it's alot harder to feel alone or like no one cares about you when your Lord and Master (your pet) is demanding attention and care.

Answer 3

You know kids are very mean in school, and please i beg of you not to try suicide anymore, i have been there, and that is not the answer. Your family should not be picking on you, it just makes it harder on you, and you proably find that you eat more. You need to find a better coping skill then self mutialation, i know i did that too. And when you leave there, you will find that some of the most handsome men do marry large women, so it is just the people that you are around now, it will not be like this all of the time, and you will find some one that loves you for who you are. So stand fast lady, and try not to let their comments get to you, and i know that is hard, cause you have been listening to it all of your life, not only from the kids, but your family too. They should of been surporting you, and i am very sorry they did not like they should of . Go and see a therapist and get some of this out by talking, and learn some better and healther ways of coping, cause you really don't need to self mutilate, you are doing that to cope with what they are saying, so go to a professional as soon as you can, an try to not pay any attention to the neg talk you are getting. I know it is hard and they have hurt you really bad, so you may need to be in therapy for a while. But you will find that not all people are like the ones that you are around now, so there is help and hope at the end of the tunnel. Please go and get some professional help, and let them know what is going on, and how it hurts, and what you do to relief that pain, and they will help you get out of this .

Answer 4

I have been cutting for a while do. Pain becomes an addiction and addictions are very hard to get rid of. You should sit your family down and tell them that what they're saying bothers you. If they don't listen talk to somebody you trust about how youre feeling. As for others around you, you really cant do much about them. The most you can do is learn to not care what they think of you. You will find someone for you, lots of people in fact, once you get away from where you are. Since you are 18 I'm guessing you will be out of skool soon. Once your done with skool get out of that town as fast as you can. people that make fun of someone just because theyre different are stupid in my opinion. There is one girl at skool that everyone makes fun of where I live and I cant stand that theyre so cruel to her so i am nice to her because i kno she could be on the verge of suicide. If you want to talk to anyone you cant go ahead and email me or IM me [e-mail] or xxxbeautys_little_defectxxx . I hope things get better for you cuz i kno what youre going through and i kno it isnt easy. good luck!!

Answer 5

How did you tried to attempt to suicide? Did you thought about your mom? What would she feel if her lovely kid is dead? Everyone in your family loves you... you just have to realize it. Its obvious that most guys dont but some guys like healthy girls for which you shall have to wait. But if you kept mutilating, it would be hard to get attracted towards you.

You could try to join some professional weigh lifting or wresting academy where you could find proper guy for you & a good career as per your physique.

Just love yourself & be happy.

Answer 6

Honey this is awful i know but you must stop doing it befor you hit the bottom and ending you'r life this way is also terrible .
Any way before you start doing that think about the best moment in you'r life and the people who depend in you .. try to volenteer to work with people in need this well help you to apreciate you'r life.

Answer 7

ASHLEY~

MY HEART BLEEDS FOR YOU...I GET IT! I UNDERSTAND!!
PEOPLE ARE SO WARPED IN THEIR MINDS THEY LIVE NORMAL LIVES AND CANNOT RELATE WITH THOSE WHO HAVE DEEP SEEDED ISSUES....I AM ONE OF THEM LIKE YOU.

IF I ASKED YOU TO DESCRIBE HOW YOU FEEL ABOUT YOURSELF WOULD THIS BE YOUR DESCRIPTION?

ALONE

NO ONE UNDERSTANDS ME

IN MY FAVOURITE CLOTHES I STILL FEEL UGLY

I CANNOT EVEN FIGURE OUT WHY I JUST KNOW THAT SELF DESTRUCTION TAKES ME OUT OF THE PAINFUL ELEMENT I AM IN AT THAT MOMENT.

OK SO THERE ARE JUST A FEW REASONS WE DO WHAT WE DO.....ALL LEADS BACK TO "ESCAPE"

WE WANT SO BADLY TO ESCAPE OUR UGLY REALITY BUT HONESTLY ASHLEY HEAR ME WHEN I SAY THIS TO YOU....

YOU ARE ONE OF THE FEW WOMAN IN THIS WORLD THAT IF YOU REACH TO A HEALING METHOD FOR YOUR DEPRESSION YOU COULD HELP SOOOOOOOOO MANNNNNNNNY WOMAN WHO FEEL THERE IS JUST NO ANSWER.

I WENT THROUGH THERAPY SEVERAL TIMES AND IT REALLY TAKES THE RIGHT THERAPIST OR SOMEONE YOU RELATE TO TO HELP YOU THROUGH THIS....YOU ARE WORTH LIVING! YOU'RE WEIGHT IS NOT WHO YOU ARE, I AM 5'7 135 POUNDS, BLONDIE, BLUE EYES AND JUST AS DEPRESSED AS YOU ARE. PEOPLE AROUND US ARE CRUEL....TELL YOURSELF "THEY JUST CAN'T UNDERSTAND BECAUSE THEY HAVE NEVER BEEN THERE"

YOU CAN TALK TO ME ANYTIME....JUST DON'T LET GO

YOU HAVE A PURPOSE!!!

Answer 8

people will respect you only if you respect yourself. Find god and live life more happy. Don't cut yourself stop. Be brave and live your life your 18 life will get better. If you feel like crap you will be crap. As for your wait work out count calories and go for it.good luck.