I'm confused about how this makes me spoiled?

Question

Recently I was in the market for a used COUPE MANUAL car. I told my parents I was going to buy one, but they asked me to hold off so they could maybe look into helping me buy a car and get one a bit safer perhaps. They wound up buying me a brand new 4 door automatic honda civic (2006) after I repeatedly said I would rather have a used 2 door/manual instead of a 4 dr/automatic, but they ignored htat and bought it anyways.

Now I have a new car, but I really don't like it at all. It's boring, and quite ugly being a 4 door. I have offered numerous time to either give it to my sister, let me trade it in and buy my own car, or just sell it, give them the money, and buy my own.

My parents, however, are astonished at how spoiled I'm acting. The way I see it, I spent about 6500 on the car, and they completely over-turned my preferences. They chose a diff color, transmission, and 4 door over a 2 door. Now I want to buy my own car and they are freaking out. How am I being spoiled here? I

I also just want to let it known that I AM grateful for what my parents did. I just think it was wrong of them to ignore what I wanted in my OWN car (I didn't tell my parents what they could buy when buying a car), and I'm even more angry that they spent ~$900 EXTRA getting the crap I didn't want (auto tranny, 4 door).

What burns me even MORE is that they didn't respect my opinions at all towards my own car, even when I put down $6500 on it, and ignored me by not letting me just choose my own used car.

Just to add some more to this...

We did shop around, and when my parents refused to let me buy my own car because they knew it would be unsafe and all that, I appreciate that very much. So they picked the civic for it's safety, and I was fine with this.

I did, however, figure that with the $6,500 that I put towards it that I DID earn with my job, I would have some say in the car. There was my absolute dream car - 2 door, black, manual on the lot for 17,100. They declined on it, and then a brown, 4 door, automatic for 18,300 came in and they bought it. I was with them, and protested it the whole time, saying I would MUCH rather buy my own cheaper car, as long as it was a manual, rather than having a car my grandmother should be driving.

Answer 1

yes and no. yes because i can see where your parents are coming from. My daughter is only 7 months but if she did what you are doing i would consider it rude. you said that you were grateful but by saying everything you said above your parents probably don't think you are and think that you are spoiled. no because they should have listened to you a little more and got you a car that you like. you should have been there with your parents when they were buying your car so you could have told them exactly what you wanted or even found something there when they were shopping. sorry that doesn't help much.

Answer 2

I don't think that you're being spoiled and maybe your parents over reacted BUT at the same time, you have to understand that they have your best interests in mind. It was very responsible of you to go ahead and buy your own car, and I'm sure your parents realize this. However, I'm assuming that you're 17 or so, which would mean that you have no experience driving or owning a car. A stick is fine, and it's cheaper, but even if you do know how to drive it, chances are you'll make mistakes here and there. In an automatic, it is much less of a possibility to ruin the transmission (which are very pricey to fix) AND they do save on fuel mileage.

As for the four-door aspect of it, it A) makes the car a bit bigger, therefore safer and B) allows for more people / stuff to fit inside. Doesn't seem like a big deal, I know, but two-doors can be a pain in the butt, especially when it comes time to move into an apartment or hit college. Also, I believe four doors are cheaper to insure.

As for it being ugly...trust me, you do not want a brand new car when you're young. Did you pick red? Some people believe, and some even swear that insurance companies still consider red cars high risk. I have no idea how color can make a difference in insurance, but apparently, some think it still happens. Also, you're just getting used to the road and may get into a fender bender or chip some paint. What's worse is--even if you treat it like gold--chances are your friends will not. Eating in the car, jumping around, pounding on the seats, sitting on the hood, smoking in there and hopefully this never happens, but young kids can get catty, and your brand new car would become a target. It's lame, I know, but it's a fact of life. I'm in my late 20s and have never owned a brand new car. It's not about the money, it's about the fact that I don't have the resources to keep her pristine...a garage, a secured spot, a safe neighborhood, etc. Plus, I put so many miles on my cars, that having a brand new one is almost useless.

Your best bet right now is to keep the car, and be happy with it. Not because you have to, but because it makes the most sense. It will get dinged, dented, used and abused. Think about it. You may not (depending on how old you are) get out of college and into a full-time, salaried job for another 4-8 years...your brand new car should last that no problem if you take care of her. I promise...it's not as bad as you think, and your parents were acting in your best interest. It's not like they conspired to buy an uncool car and ruin your social status or something, it's just that they've been driving for years and know what to expect. Good luck with yoyur new car, and savor it...my first car cost me $5, and it came without an engine. I had to rebuild it myself without prior experience, and for awhile, drove it in just primer, and even at one point, it was stripped down to the bare metal so we could paint it. For one week in the summer, that thing cooked in the sun...I mean the hood could've reached 200*F and it would rust in humidity...didn't even need rain. I eventually got her primered and have her still, 10 years later.

Cars are fun...enjoy yourself and be safe out there!

Answer 3

When I was eighteen I wanted to buy a used (Very used) '59 Cadillac. I asked my dad to co-sign a loan for it. He said no. I was very upset and just couldn't accept his reasoning that the car was too used and I'd end up walking soon after buying it. I was blind to the problems I might have with the car, I just WANTED it. It wasn't too many years later I saw that he was right, even though I did buy a couple of used Caddys later on, and an MG.
Your parents can see the your future because they've been there. They are trying to give you the benefit of their experience.
I know you think your parents just aren't "with it". But think about exactly what you need this car to do for you. It's transportation.
The car you want is more than that, it's an extension of you, your youthfulness, your freedom of expression.
But that same car is going to attract the attention of people you'd rather not have to deal with - the cops!
Cops like to target young people, because it's easier than going after a guy in a Cadillac that might be a judge.
With your graduation tassle hanging from the mirror, and getting scratch between upshifts, you make an easy target. Think about the car you have as your "stealth" wagon. You can even make it sound like a cool idea to your friends.

Answer 4

You have to be careful in this situation. A similar thing happened to me with my car I wanted a stick but my dad said to get an automatic. So we looked at a car and it was in good shape. Anyway I think your parents where trying to save you money and meant good. They want you to save your money. My advice drive it around a little while, maybe you'll get use to it! After about a couple months you explain that you want to try to get a car on your own. Tell em you really appreciate it but you want to modify!
They did you a huge favor put that cash in the bank earn some interest and in a couple months you have more money in your pocket = bigger mods!!!
My Advice put the money in the bank you still don't like the civic, buy a different car. But give the car a chance b4 throwing it back in your parents face!

Answer 5

I think you will understand when you have your own kids. They are looking out for what they think is best for you. You are suppose to honor your father and mother. I assume you are not 18 yet. They have the ultimate say whether you like it or not. They feed you and put a roof over your head and way too much to mention. Be grateful for all things they give to you. The money you earn is actually theirs...that's right, theirs. Until you are 18, any money you earn should go to them either to help out or in appreciation for all they do for you. When I bought my first school car, the exact thing happened to me. Man was I P.O.-ed !!! But then again, it did get me from point a-b with no problems. I trusted my parents and respected them and their decision at that time. They in turn learned to respect me in time. Respect is something earned. I think you are acting somewhat spoiled. Trust me, you will own many more cars/trucks in your lifetime, and you will appreciate them so much more now that you had to go through this.

Answer 6

Spoiled? A serious understatement!
You got a brand new excellent car for about 30% of its price. I can see your point in having a stick over automatic but insurance on 4dr is much less than on a coupe because coupe is considered "sport". Don't ask me why - it's not me but insurance freaks. Hell, I would get that car in a flash if someone offered it to me for $6,500. I would actually get three...
Consider this: your buddies drive some 10 yo pos like ford or chevy, and can only dream (those whose IQ is above 0) about what you got.

Answer 7

If it's registered and titled to you, go ahead, put an ad in the AutoTrader - get your shift on in a 2 door manual Civic. Quite frankly there are better deals out there - VW Rabbit (if you can live with the name) or even a GTi - It just doesn't sound like you shopped around... you just want that Civic, huh?

Answer 8

They were doing their best to get you the most practical and best
value in a car that they could think of....
They should have let you make a less practical choice which
more suited your personal preferences but their choice was
made out of love for you....
Don't be overly critical...

Answer 9

doesn't really sound like you are acting spoiled it sounds more like you are stepping on your parents toes in taking away their control over you.

they obviously see your rejection of what they have done only from there perspective. be careful here, I don't know how old you are or some of the other nuances of your relationship with your parents are, it sounds like a milestone in your growing into your independence.

you can do it, make sure though to allow your parents the time to grow along with you. it's (changes in life) just as new to them as it is for you.

Answer 10

I don't think you are acting spoiled at all.Your parents sound like they are being a bit controlling.They should have tried to come up with a compromise.