im pregnant with my second child,and my partner is agrovating me he left me when i was 3 months pregnant on my first child and then made me have a dna test.she is now 4an a half and we are back together and having second child!but just cant get along with each other.please help me not sure that i want him to leave,but cant go on living like this worried bout me and baby!
2007-01-18 03:37:23 · 19 answers · asked by amy_cuddihy 1 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Other - Pregnancy & Parenting
Do what YOU want.......If you really love this man, despite his problems, then you two should seek marital counseling....It will help you communicate to him the things that he needs to work on, and in turn, he can tell you what bothers him. I know the thought of counseling may not be very appealing, and often times it gets expensive, but isn't it worth it if it makes the rest of your lives together wonderful and helps you with your anxiety??
If you are just staying with him because you don't want to do it alone, don't! You seem like a smart, strong woman that deserves more than it sounds like you get. Don't settle for any man that doesn't treat you and your kids like royalty....You and your kids deserve it!!!! If it won't work with this guy, then drop him and find a man that will treat you right and also someone that enjoys the same things you do........Don't stay with someone that you will fight with in front of the kids....They definitely don't need to hear fighting.
I wish you well!!
2007-01-18 07:35:51 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I am having partner problems to but I have decided not to make any decisions until after the baby is born. Just would be to stressful for me. But if you feel more stressed with him I would leave. Do whatever you feel will be less stressful you need support now. So find someone who can give it to you. I suffer from anxiety to and some weeks it is unbearable I cant even sleep. I hope things work out for you and I know everyone says this try to relax. Worring will not make it happen. What will be will be. SO try to enjoy today. I am trying every time I start to worry I say the serenity prayer God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change the courage to change the things I can and the wisdom to know the difference.
2007-01-18 03:47:25 · answer #2 · answered by Sheilah b 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
As a mom, you always have your kids well-being in mind. It's bad enough that your man is aggravating you - his pregnant partner - but your 4 year old is potentially being exposed to a hostile environment and THAT ain't good. Even if you're not fighting in front of her (which I hope you're not), she's old enough to sense the tension and feel anxious about it. What is this doing to her psychologically? You have to think of her emotional well-being too.
Both you and your man have to work out your issues privately and that usually means counselling to help you both learn how to effectively communicate with each other and achieve some sense of harmony.
If you end up not being able to make it work, remember this:
My mother and father never argued but their relationship was an unhappy one. When they seperated, it took a little time to adjust but I realized fairly quickly that they were better parents apart than together.
2007-01-18 04:09:29 · answer #3 · answered by Shorty 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You need to have a heart to heart talk with your partner and state strongly to this man that he is causing you anxiety, which can be a cause of miscarriage. Tell him also that babies are aware of yelling and arguing going on in their home even if they are not born yet and it can cause them distress.
I don't know enough about the two of you to know if there is emotional abuse going on, but it is a possibility. The two of you need to see a relationship counselor and, if things do not improve, I suggest a trial separation. As you are pregnant and if you are poor, your county will almost definitely help you to find transitional housing and financial help.
I wish you a peaceful rest of your pregnancy. Good luck and do not let yourself be walked over.
2007-01-18 03:51:25 · answer #4 · answered by Cait D 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Everyone suffers from anxiety, Try to make small steps forward and talk things through with him. Perhaps you could go for walks to calm yourself and get gentle exercise. similarly eat well and sleep in a routine, these things will help your anxiousness.
Talk together to decide what you both want from this, you can go to relate councillors and similar places where they will listen to you both.
You should take care of yourself now, try not to worry about your bad experiences with the other child, just try to look after your own health, and you will feel happier in yourself, get some early nights and rest, and eat fresh fruit and veg and cut down on the cigarettes, or give them up. You partner should also make similar steps to help himself too, and this will help everyone.
2007-01-18 03:42:59 · answer #5 · answered by My name's MUD 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Your question is too unclear. Why did he need a DNA test? Have the 2 of you been together ever since, and is he only aggravating now that you are pregnant, or was he always this aggravating? That would affect my answer. Being aggravated will not harm the baby, (goodness knows pregnant women have been aggravated before!) unless there is more to this?
2007-01-18 03:46:06 · answer #6 · answered by Livn 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
well you knew all this when you got pregnant with the second child, and I know thats not the point now because its over and done with but you do need to look at that fact and come to an understanding with yourself that you chose to do this and to be fair to the children they deserve a peacful atmosophere I dont know I know thats not answering your question but things that need to be looked at, ok anyways when you really are in love with someone and want to work it out and get along you do, you make that commitment and effort to get along, I learned a lot when I fell in love with my Charlie its not always about changing them its changing yourself also like choosing not to get mad about something or let it bother you or choose to say it in a nice when instead of yelling those little things make such a big difference, good luck Kim
2007-01-18 03:48:48 · answer #7 · answered by KIMBUR 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
He is your anxiety and stress get rid of him and you rid your self of most of your stress and anxiety. Believe in your self and your ability to be a wonderful mother and provider for your children. That guy doesn't deserve you and his children just worry about you and those babies. Just don't think that when the baby is born history won't repeat its self because 9 out of 10 times history will repeat its self. Your worth more than constant worry, stress, and anxiety just take care of your self and your children and sooner or later the right guy who will love you and your babies unconditionally will come along.
2007-01-18 04:03:42 · answer #8 · answered by lovelittlelulu 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well thats very tough on you .How about get ready to do things without him.Mabe he'll figure out where daddy should be.Too much stress on you affects the baby you probably know that,so think of your unborn more than your ignorant husband.A mam should man up when it's called for.I wish you well Peace Victorio
2007-01-18 03:46:52 · answer #9 · answered by walter_nahbexie 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
No wonder you suffer from anxiety!! Are you just staying with this man coz u r scared to do it all alone???? That is not a good enough reason. Hope you work it out by yourself
2007-01-18 03:42:39 · answer #10 · answered by ? 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋