Both my husband and I are wiccan, Please no one try to save our eternal soul, just becuase we dont believe what you do. I am not trying to push my religion on you.
My child is still too young to worry about religion, but I want to be prepaired. The thing is I know that my family is going to tell him that if he does not go with them to catholic masses he will burn in hell. My husband and I do not believe that any god or goddess could ever send someone to "hell" for all eternity, so my main concern is that he would be scared into picking a religion instead of learning completely about it and then chosing. I would have no problem if my son CHOSE to be catholic, but I need to know that it was his choice and not just pressure from my family. I want him to learn about religion and chose one based on HIS BELIEFS. How do I help guide him through something that for a lot of people is so hard???
Thank you
2007-01-18 00:48:53 · 26 answers · asked by Anonymous in Society & Culture ➔ Religion & Spirituality
Okay, hoping that I won't offend you...
The thing is, your kid is too young to stand up for himself. This is actually not about religion, this is about you looking out for the well-being of your son. You need to stand up for him.
You need to talk to your family, you need to tell them that you don't want them to tell your son about hell.
No matter what religion people have, no TRUE goodness has ever come from fear. And with you being a wiccan, I'm sure you agree with me on that. So, please stand up for your son. Don't allow your family to do such things to him.
When your son is old enough, he will be wise enough to make his own decision on which religion to pick. For now, please stand up for him.
I'm actually happy that you ask this question here. It shows you care, it shows you worry and it shows you're a good parent.
I wish you good luck! :)
2007-01-18 01:09:39 · answer #1 · answered by ? 6 · 9⤊ 1⤋
Well first of all you are very brave to be asking this question here, since it's obvious from your question that you know a lot of people won't be able to resist trying to "save" you.
I'm going to throw some thoughts out there, and I hope one or more of them helps you, okay?
One of the things that I remember from my childhood is that my mother was very clear on the difference between being spiritual and being religious. She comes from an Irish-Catholic family and raised me Catholic. But there was never any elitism in how I was taught about Catholicism. I wasn't taught that Catholicism was the One True Way. Heck I even went to a Jewish preschool and learned all about the Jewish holidays. :)
I think she acheived this openness through a few different ways. And I'm sorry that I can't remember exactly how she did it. But through her actions and personal beliefs I was able to grow up understanding that I was being raised Catholic because this is what my mother believed, but that all religions that teach a person to be loving toward one another are equally valid, and that when I got older if I wanted to choose a different religion that was okay, too.
I think it's great that you want to make sure your son can choose what he wants to believe. My only suggestion about that is to actually teach him about the various religions, specifically the ones that you and your family practice. My father was raised in a home where two very different religions were practiced by his parents. Yet they didn't bother teaching him about either religion. As a result he's agnostic. Not that that's a bad thing, but if he had been taught then he could have made an informed decision.
If your child is still very young then my suggestion would be to include him in both the Wiccan and Catholic rituals and traditions. Most Catholics are not going to feel in the mood to rain fire and brimstone down on a kid who is celebrating a holiday with them. Then you can casually point out similarities and differences between the two beliefs in private, away from the prying eyes of your Catholic family.
I think that for me having one religion that I was raised in and knew the most about helped inform my decisions later in life. It gave me a stable base to work from in determining which religions might be right for me. Perhaps being raised to learn about both religions but with the understanding that one religion figures more prominently in your household than others will give him a stable base in which to explore other religions later in his life. It might take the pressure off him to choose at a young age, and will keep him from feeling adrift and feeling obligated to pick a religion to belong, since the religion of origin will have been chosen for him.
So those are my random thoughts that are somewhat connected. I hope they help you, and I'm glad that you're thinking about this now while your son is still young so that it won't be as confusing a topic when he gets older.
Blessed Be and God Bless! :)
2007-01-18 01:20:27 · answer #2 · answered by Jen 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You child will learn what Wicca is and what Wicca teaches by watching how you and your husband act, whether you specifically teach him the Way or not.
He will also learn what Christianity and Catholicism are by how he sees Christians and Catholics act. If he runs into even a handful of the kinds of posters that have responded to this question, you shouldn't have to worry about him chosing Catholicism because he was "scared" into it.
I really wish the truly nice Christians and Catholics who are out there would post more. I know they exist - I've seen them once or twice. I'm getting really tired of the ignorance that is evident in so many of the answers to your question.
Good luck!
)O(
2007-01-18 04:21:23 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
The first problem is teaching an individual to think. to reason from cause to effect. That is the major tool that the Almighty has given humans to sort things out. Scripture does not teach that the Almighty will torture people for eternity. Scripture teaches that after this fiasco of sin, the mess must be cleaned up, and YHVH is the only one who can do it, and that He will do it by purifying this earth with fire. I can readily understand why a person would reject the teachings of "churchianity". Anyone who is diligently trying to follow Scripture MUST reject the teachings of "organized religion" for they contradict Scripture.
Each person is given "a measure of faith". The question is "what will they have faith (trust) in?" If you try to bring the child up in the vacuum of moral relativism (that there is nothing trustworthy out there) you are denying that there is such a thing as real truth. A lot of people have that opinion, but it is not "value neutral". It is limiting a being to a strictly relativistic situational ethics. Your "faith" whatever it is, is based on some basic values.... (the good the bad or the ugly). I recommend Scripture as a measuring tool. You will be out of step with most everyone else, but you will be striving to be in harmony with the Almighty.
2007-01-18 01:13:57 · answer #4 · answered by hasse_john 7 · 0⤊ 2⤋
I would start explaining to him now that there are many other wonderful religions out there and this is what you and your husband believes. You should also explain that no one religion is right or wrong and that even though some believe in hell most of them don't. Then as he gets older he can explore all religions on his own and chose whats right for him.
2007-01-18 00:56:06 · answer #5 · answered by mhireangel 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋
You obviously chose your religion by your beliefs.No matter what you parents did or does to change that. Be sure your son will do the same.Remember though that you mustn't become your parents.If he chooses to be Catholic..it will be his choice.He may go with your parents as you did with your husband to a church of choice but it was your choice and not his nor your parents.He is defenseless now but will develop his own personality much sooner than you think.Let him know who you are and let him know you love who he is too.Don't keep him from learning who your parents are either.They are a part of you.Good luck.
2007-01-18 01:03:49 · answer #6 · answered by jen_n_tn 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
What ever you do, don't take any of the advice you get here. Every person on here has his or her own agenda. One person even asked you to sen your son to a Baptist Cult, claiming that that Cult follows the bible better.
This isn't an easy thing for you to deal with. If your son goes down a different religious path than you it can be tough on the family, and if he goes down your path it could bring your family closer. If you believe your faith to be right, then raise your son in it, any deviation would show doubt in your chosen faith. (Not trying to be mean, just honest.)
2007-01-18 01:06:09 · answer #7 · answered by vertical732 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Unfortunately, in our society, he will not only get the hellfire threat from your family, but also from friends, billboards, radio and TV shows, etc. When he questions it, simply tell him, "We don't believe that." When he's old enough to fully understand, you can explain your beliefs.
In the meantime, the best thing you can do for your son is live your beliefs. This doesn't mean to drag him to every ritual you attend, but to incorporate your belief system into your everyday life. Your reverence for nature, tolerance of diversity in all things not just religion, and your confidence in your gods will speak more eloquently to him that any explanation you can give him later.
2007-01-18 01:00:37 · answer #8 · answered by uglygrandmother 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Kids cannot "choose" a religion - they lack, and will for sometime lack the cognitive toolkit necessary to make such a choice. And you cannot condition a child for such a time of choosing. You will only confuse them.
It is much more important that you simply raise your child within the religious context within which they live. If a child grows up in a household in which some form of spirituality exists, then his or her spiritual faculties will be developed enough as an adult to make the appropriate choices.
It is like reading or writing; a child needs their innate spiritual abilities tended to by their parents when young, so that those skills are sufficiently developed later in life to be used effectively.
Raise your child in your religion. If questions come up, then questions come up, and address them as simply and concisely as possible when they do. But don't make your children's lives any more complex, grey area-ish, or confused than they need to be....
2007-01-18 00:57:14 · answer #9 · answered by evolver 6 · 2⤊ 1⤋
I personally am Agnostic and I believe that if you want your child to have an open mind about religion and his options you should school him in them. Give him the facts about a few, talk to him about what you believe non bias. And about what they believe. Perhaps take him to church. Let him read a bible. If you really want him to make his own decisions you'll have to let him explore.
P.S.
For all those seemingly still trying to "save your soul" I think the diversity of your ideas with your families religions, your son will grow up with, will keep him an open mind to new ideas.
I wasn't raised in a religious household to say the least.
At one point of my life I spent many years belonging to a church or three.
Even though I left I made the decision to go to and to leave the church on my own mind regardless of my upbringing.
2007-01-18 00:54:30 · answer #10 · answered by Katrina 3 · 4⤊ 1⤋
Here's what I have told my children --
All through time and history people have believed all kinds of things about gods and goddesses. There's no one RIGHT religion, otherwise we would have been given more clear instructions.
There's one thing I'm sure of -- if there is/are gods, goddesses, supreme beings, they are GOOD; it's people who distort things and cause evil.
Any religion that suggests that people harm other people, or any religion that suggests something horrible will happen to a person if they don't believe a certain way -- that is something to be wary of.
(By the way, I consider myself to be a Christian, although many of them would disown me.)
2007-01-18 01:01:43 · answer #11 · answered by who me? 5 · 3⤊ 1⤋