I have split with my ex as he is evil and nasty! we have a 1 yr old baby together. my ex reckons he can see the baby all the time and even take him abroad (Which i am scared of happening as he is turkish and has told me he can keep the baby out there as the english police cant touch anyone in the country) what are my rights to stop him from taking him anywhere abroad and what vistation rights is he allowed to a minimum!!!
2007-01-17 19:51:05 · 12 answers · asked by Anonymous in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Other - Pregnancy & Parenting
There's a lot to this issue and unfortunately I don't have the time at present to answer your question in detail (I should have been getting ready for work 10 minutes ago!).
I would suggest that you visit adviceguide on the web, produced by citizens advice (assuming you are british).
If the information contained there isn't precise or detailed enough, then get into a Citizens Advice Bureau asap.
2007-01-17 20:07:27 · answer #1 · answered by Pete J 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Speaking from the experience of a family member I might be able to help. Firstly, is he on the birth certificate? If not he first has to prove he is the childs father through DNA which if going through the NHS can take quite a while which will buy you some time for the following. If he wants visitation rights he is allowed but you both have to go to court to make arrangments. If you state in the court that he is a flight risk and that you are worried he will kidnap him, he may be given supervised visits but these will not be permanent (usually only until he proves himself trust worthy). The courts usually gives dads every other weekend. There is a piece of paperwork you can fill to stop him removing your child from the country without your permission. The baby will need a passport anyway, and for that he will need to send the babies your and fathers birth certificates to apply for one. At local police stations they have paperwork for kidnap reduction where they will take your sons foot prints and finger prints so they have a file in case the babies name comes up on passport applications or other stuff (not sure if all police stations do this but do ask). Unfortunately, it is seen to be in your childs interests to know their father. Good luck, I hope this helps, ignore his threats he is sore that you are finished but do not give him the chance to carry them out. Please start ringing around now. You can get state help if you cant afford a solicitor.
2007-01-17 22:35:54 · answer #2 · answered by clairewENSLEY 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I don' t think I can type this fast enough...get an attorney!! Point blank!!! Cancel the child's passport if he has one! Video tape, audio tape, get in writing via e-mail or otherwise his threats as this is a very serious matter. What some people realize is that the US laws do not apply overseas. He is right...in some countries the father has complete control over the child. Have you ever seen "Not without my daughter" with Sally Fields. You need to know that the US will not be able to help you in other countries. They can try, but as you know we don't even negotiate with terrorist, so go figure...an ATTORNEY, A JUDGE, AND COMMON SENSE is your only hope. Leave the state if you have to...find out what laws you must abide by as well. But as a Mother I can tell you this...no law, no where, will stop me from stopping any fool who tries to take my baby away...as the great Malcolm X said "by any means necessary"!!! Good Luck
2007-01-17 20:05:21 · answer #3 · answered by aprildin 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He's probably watching your every move, but if it's possible soon, pack up the baby with minimal diaper bag stuff and clothes for yourself and get outta town before he does. Plan it all out without saying a word to him or your parents and friends [you can mail family & friends a short note about what you're doing and why--and swear each of them to secrecy.] Mail these from the town you're now leaving.] Then once you've gotten the plan settled, go! Don't use any credit cards he can trace, and don't head for parents or friends home, he already knows where you might go.
Be thankful your child is just a baby and not in school yet. You can travel by bus without having a traceable ticket, but by air--no. Do not contact your family for a while or your friends and change cell phones & #s often or use payphones when really needed. If you're working now, don't give any notice--just don't show up. If you've a driver's license, don't renew it right away in your new state/city--it's also traceable, as are your bank account transactions. This is something to be well-thought-out and well executed. Your son's well-being is at stake, so is yours from the sounds of it.
I wish you much good luck and a whole bunch of courage. You'll need it 'cause starting fresh somewhere else isn't easy. If you take the point of view that it's for your child's benefit, your mothering instinct should keep you both safe.
BEST OF GOOD LUCK TO YOU.
P.S. I believe that legally (if you are legally married and perhaps even if you're not) you are abandoning your husband. He definitely has rights to see his son so if you stick around, he can prob. get some judge to agree to have half parental custody or at the very least, visitation rights.
Don't know if this'll work for you, but try making up a new name and when you get to somewhere you can catch your breath, mail yourself (with new name) some blank pages and make sure they get delivered to you--you are trying to establish residence in another name. You will have to use you same social security#, I believe, at least that's how I did it many moons ago and it worked for 10+years. I worked under that new name, too.
Don't forget to take with you your and baby's birth certificate and any other important identifying papers (social security card, your copies of tax returns showing SS#s you may need. Think about it as though you were he trying to find you and what he'd likely do-then counter that with a move you need to make. Stay close to your son. He's the precious cargo here, yes?
If it were me, I'd plan it all out and GO!
But that's just me. Luck babe!
A Mother
2007-01-17 20:48:51 · answer #4 · answered by MJ D 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
I agree that you should seek legal advice as soon as possible. You say that he is evil and nasty but not how. If he has made threats to you or harmed you, you may be able to get a non-molesation order which would prevent contact with you. Certainly you need to do something to get the custody issue sorted out.
If you are concerned that he may take your child out of the country, you may be able to get supervised access where he meets the child in a closely monitored and secure centre. If you believe your child is in danger, talk to the police and involve Social Services.
I assume that you are in the UK?
Make some calls today!
2007-01-17 21:28:14 · answer #5 · answered by Rats 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If he is on the birth certificate he will have parental responsibility but still does not mean that he has a right to take your baby. He has to have your permission to take your child out of the country. The best thing you can do is go to the citizens advice. let them know that he is threatening to take your baby. My sisters child was taken from her by his dad and she didn't get him back for years. But the law has changed a lot since then. Get some legal advice. Stay one step ahead X
2007-01-18 01:25:55 · answer #6 · answered by donna g 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I don't know where you are but you need to take him to court and get some custody orders now. Document everything he is threatening.
In the meantime, don't let him visit your baby without supervision. He has parental rights as a father but if he can't work in the best interest of the child then those rights can be reduced or revoked.
2007-01-17 20:00:39 · answer #7 · answered by wendysorangeblossoms 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He has all legal rights of a father according to British standards. BE VERY CAREFUL with this guy because if he can get the child to his home country then the police will not help you get him back. In his country children basically belong to the father!!! Dont let him take the child out of the country, get a court ordered visitation and make sure they tell him he cannot take the child to Turkey.
2007-01-18 00:48:55 · answer #8 · answered by elaeblue 7 · 0⤊ 1⤋
I dont know where your from. But where I am the parent needs the other parents written permission to take children out of the country. Good Luck
2007-01-17 19:56:41 · answer #9 · answered by beaner 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Unless you are married he has no legal rights until he asks you to sign a parental rights from a solicitor, even then he needs to have you written permission to take the child out of the country. you can decline to sign the parental agreement on the grounds of his behaviour and safety of your child ,goodluck
2007-01-17 20:39:13 · answer #10 · answered by Elaina k 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋