Living with my fiance?

Question

We are married in our hearts...We live as man and wife. We are monogmous...Nothing will change when we sign the marraige license except by "law we are married". In the biblical days were there marraige liscenses and such to declare it legal? What makes this a sin if we already pledged to God to be faithful to one another?

Where does it say in the Bible it must be public and in a church?? There are many people who are married at the courthouse or outside in the park!!!
Also we are planning our wedding for the summer ...So Yes,,,,we love each other dearly...But dont see the big deal in "the wedding"

Also about people not being able to read and write,,,,then how was the Bible documented....and the apostles wrote a lot of letters for not being able to read and write!

Answer 1

You are mixing up the two: legal marriage which is governed by the state and religious marriage. A marriage license has nothing to do with sin. Of course there was no marriage license in Biblical times as that is the civil requirement.
You may have pledged to each other privately to be faithful and to God, however doing so in a more formalized way before God and witnesses cements it further.
By the way, when you say Fiance are you engaged? That's a word I see misused often meaning "significant other" and not engaged.
On the civil or legal marriage, it does offer protections regarding inheritance, next of kin status etc... that you need to sort out if you are not married.

Answer 2

If you love each other so much, why not just get married? Since most people didn't read and write, no, there weren't marriage licenses back then (no one could have read them). Being married in the Temple/synagouge/church was declaring before God and man that the two people married was enough (and you haven't done that).

Maybe you don't love each other as much as you think? Maybe you have doubts and want an escape hatch?

The Bible says in numerous places adultery is a sin. All you're doing is creating a "cafeteria religion" where you pick and choose what you want.

"If you accept the parts if the Gospel you like, but reject the parts you don't like, then it is not the Gospel you love, but yourself"
--St. Augustine

Answer 3

living with your fiance is not sin per say.

do you think or fantasize about Him and how many times, living together have you two been intimant in the Biblical sense?

Lust in your heart is sin, as Jesus said if you look with lust in your heart you are guilty of audultry already.

more importantly though, you are to refrain from the very appearance of evil. for even if you and you fiance walk in purity & chasity you could be the cause of a weaker believer falling into sin or the reason non believers site for Christians being a hyprocrite. not that you are but the appearance alone could be cause enough for the accuastion.

you may not want to admit it either, but now you think it will be all the same but its not. as soon as your married a whole new mind set takes place. theres a difference like going from being a step parent to having a biological child. there are numerous studies that have proven this out. studies also have shown that couples that cohabitate before marriage are 50% more likely to divorce than those that did not. the national divorce rate is now 53% cohabitators divorce rate is nearly 75%. be prepared your mind sets will change and the odds are against you.

you never said if you were christian or not, but i am assuming you are. also i don't preach to you with out having personally gone through just what you are doing now. your trying to justify what you want because you want it. but the standard is clear.

God is bigger than this issue and will love you through it whether you listen, but there will be consaquences to your choices. what a man sow he reaps.

your marraige will be blessed when you build it on the Rock and obey the word of the Lord. that is where the blessing is.

don't forget that in ancient times marriage meant intercourse and the very act of sex bound you to that person. standards have been lowered since those days.

you live in the present and we have to use the customs of our day and society. we cant call up the old ways & days when we think it works to our advantage. if we try t one bit we must use the whole.

you know what is right, your a good person and your spirit will witness to you just listen.

Blessings on you and your marriage. May God reveal Himself to you two and abide in your hearts.

Answer 4

Marriage traditionally has been...1. public and 2. a contract. If you haven't made a public acknowledgement (lawful marriage in front of justice of the peace or pastor etc..) or have not signed a marriage contract, then you are not truly married and just "playing house". There are provisions under law that protect a widow and benefits a widow and the children of that marriage recieve when a husband dies. It honors you as his lifelong partner and it honors his children. To not get married officially means there is no real commitment and that dishonors both of you. If it's truly until death do us part, then why NOT get married other than the fact that somewhere deep down inside one or both of you aren't really intending to stick with it until death. You or him or both have one foot in the relationship but have left the door cracked for an "out". This brings no comfort to the relationship and can disease the relationship for as long as you aren't married. I used to think as you do and I'm married now and I can say....there IS a difference in how I see my husband and how he sees me and the level of respect are taken to a higher standard and a comfort to me as a mother that my husband was taking responsibility for the children he helped produce. It DOES make a difference. promise. I don't think it's healthy for a woman to live with a man and not be married. I think it plagues her heart out wondering why he wouldn't.

Answer 5

made male and female and ordained marriage as the proper arrangement for the multiplication of the human race. (Ge 1:27, 28) The first human wedding was performed by Jehovah, as described at Genesis 2:22-24.Jesus pointed out, it was not Adam but God who said, “That is why a man will leave his father and his mother and he must stick to his wife and they must become one flesh.” The wording of this text makes it evident that monogamy was the original standard for marriage in the eyes of Jehovah God.—Mt 19:4-6; Ge 2:24.In view of its divine origin and God’s obvious blessing on the arrangement, it is easy to see why the inspired apostle gave this exhortation to the Hebrews: “Let marriage be honorable among all, and the marriage bed be without defilement, for God will judge fornicators and adulterers.

Answer 6

State law and God's law are two different issues here. What you're missing is the public declaration of your marriage covenant. Public is the key word. The license is a government matter. Witnesses to your commitment are necessary for a true marriage. That's God's law and the kind of marriage God blesses.

Answer 7

Sex before marriage is considered fornication. It is much abused. In Bible times, a man and woman shared vastly different social positions/privileges. Any such liason would have been considered rape except in town.
One thing you may wish to consider. In you situation in the Bible, there was no moral judgement from God, but two responses:
a) A bridle gift was required - give a gift to a charity in celebration of your covenant of love. b) They could never separate.
See - you have your bases covered.

Answer 8

In the bible Titus 3:1: "Continue reminding them to be in subjection and be obedient to governments & authorities as rulers." (When people heed these instructions, the name of each party to the union is kept above reproach, and any children are spared the reproach that falls on those whose parents are not married. Additionally, legal registration of the marriage safeguards the property rights of family members in the event of death of one of the mates.)
1Petter 2:12-15 reads, "Maintain your conduct fine among the nations, that, in the thing in which they are speaking against you as evildoers, they may as a result of your fine works of which they are eyewitnesses glorify God in the day for his inspection. For the Lord's sake subject yourselves to every human creation: whether to a king as being superior or to governors as being sent by him to inflict punishment on evildoers but to praise doers of good. For so the will of God is, that by doing good you may muzzle the ignorant talk of the unreasonable men." (this one explains itself)
IN THE BIBLICAL DAYS WERE THERE MARRAGE LICENSES?
If you read Genesis2:22-24 of the bible you'll notice that it was God himself, the Universal Sovereign, who brought Adam & Eve together. This was not a matter of a man and a woman deciding to live together without concerning themselves about legal authority.
Last but not least, Genesis 1:28 shows that the blessing of the highest legal Authority was pronounced upon the union, they were authorized to have sex relations & were given an assignment that would fill their lives with meaning.

Answer 9

Until you take your marriage vows, you are not Husband & wife, & you are living in sin. If you pledge something to God, then you will fulfill that pledge by marriage. Satan pledge all the kingdoms of this world to Jesus too, But Jeus refused it, He knew that one day he will rule this earth anyway.

Answer 10

Hard to say, some say it is living in sin. But the bible is full of stories about men who have slaves and concubines. But I think they bible doesn't actually say it is a sin, that is a human thing.