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Question

60 Things Never to Say to a Naked Guy
1. I've smoked fatter joints than that.
2. Ahh, it's cute.
3. Who circumcised you?
4. Why don't we just cuddle?
5. You know they have surgery to fix that.
6. It's more fun to look at.
7. Make it dance.
8. You know, there's a tower in Italy like that.
9. Can I paint a smiley face on that?
10. It looks like a night crawler.
11. Wow, and your feet are so big.
12. My last boyfriend was 4'' bigger.
13. It's ok, we'll work around it.
14. Is this a mild or a spicy Slim Jim?
15. Eww, there's an inch worm on your thigh.
16. Will it squeak if I squeeze it?
17. Oh no, a flash headache.
18. (giggle and point)
19. Can I be honest with you?
20. My 8-year-old brother has one like that. 21. Let me go get my tweezers.
22. How sweet, you brought incense.
23. This explains your car.
24. You must be a growing boy.
25. Maybe if we water it, it'll grow.
26. Thanks, I needed a toothpick.
27. Are you one of those pygmies?
28. Have you ever thought of working in a sideshow?
29. Every heard of clearasil?
30. All right, a treasure hunt!
31. I didn't know they came that small.
32. Why is God punishing you?
33. At least this won't take long.
34. I never saw one like that before.
35. What do you call this?
36. But it still works, right?
37. Damn, I hate baby-sitting.
38. It looks so unused.
39. Do you take steroids?
40. I hear excessive masturbation shrinks it.
41. Maybe it looks better in natural light.
42. Why don't we skip right to the cigarettes?
43. Oh, I didn't know you were in an accident.
44. Did you date Lorena Bobbitt?
45. Aww, it's hiding.
46. Are you cold?
47. If you get me real drunk first.
48. Is that an optical illusion?
49. What is that?
50. I'll go get the ketchup for your french fry.
51. Were you neutered?
52. It's a good thing you have so many other talents.
53. Does it come with an air pump?
54. So this is why you're supposed to judge people on personality.
55. Where are the puppet strings?
56. Your big gun is more like a BB gun.
57. Look, it fits my Barbie clothes.
58. Never mind, why bother.
59. Is that a second belly button?
60. Where's the rest of it?

Julia: I actually got this off another site. Didn't add it myself.

Answer 1

Does that come in adult sizes?

Answer 2

If you can afford it, get videocams and stick them in the trees or something surrounding your house and barn if you have one. You need surveillance. Or hire someone to monitor the place on live cam. If you cant afford any of that, then I guess you've done all you can at this point. I'd maybe send a report to the FBI too, since hate crimes have been committed against you in the past. And beyond that, it must be very stressful to live in an area like that, maybe you could consider moving if at all possible.

Answer 3

61. I'm just calling my friend. He is doing ph.D on parasites.
62. Never seen a nose there.
63. Ya dude. Let me call my girlfriend. She says i'm small.
64. I know the rottweiler bit ya.
65. Yo baby. It just looks like erect when it's not.
66. Tell yo girlfriend to take the slimming exercises. Her weight's effect is visible on you.

Answer 4

ILL get you some pepper to put on it when it comes out to sneeze grab it with a pair of tweezers

Answer 5

lot of good ones there smo but they all would make a man feel like crawling under the carpet10/10

Answer 6

61. Looks like a p***s only smaller.
to pa625, is that newborn, 20" long and weighs 7lb....lol

Answer 7

61.say nothing and grab your coat
62.pass him your dildo and say 'just use this'
63.Get out you dyke
64.Has your mate got a bigger one
65.That lying b!tch.

Answer 8

OMG the bottom half of you is an elephant!!!

Answer 9

oh your hung like a newborn!

Answer 10

61. I have to much time on my hands, so I typed this list!