i am 19, AP is 19
we were involved in november/december 2006
december/early january he had a relationship with J
J is an on and off relationship, they have had a phone relationship for a year.
he really likes her and says she's so special and different because she can make him laugh and smile like no other.
during the time he was seeing me (not real gf/bf but kisses/hugs/evenings out) he did not speak to her
coincidently when i fell out with him, she rang him the day after
and they got back together.
he was confused because he knows i like him very much and he liked both girls. in the end he chose her.
their relationship ended 2 weeks ago. and since then he had been upset and talking to me.
today he flirted with me.
i still like him and been through so much crap because i was almost in love with him
he is trying to get over J, and i was trying to get over him.
now he seems to enjoy flirting yet does not mention future relations.
what should i do? go with it or stop
2007-01-17 13:19:57 · 22 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
he's using you, forget about him.
he chose a phone relationship over the real thing and now she's gone he crawls back to you. this guys a loser, dont waste any more of your time on him.
what happens if she calls him tomorrow? does he ditch you again? seems likely
stop now before you get in too deep
2007-01-17 13:26:01 · answer #1 · answered by Samiya 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
I think that he's using you so forget him. You are not 100% sure that after he starts a relationship with you, he would fall for J once again and you will be much more hurt.
If he really likes you he would have chosen you in the first place and not J as he did. So he prefers J over you. So move on girl and find someone else who will love you sincerely.
Hope this helps and Good Luck hun.
2007-01-18 02:59:25 · answer #2 · answered by Falcon 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Ummm...if you still like him...ask him where is trying to head by flirting this way? Is he looking for to have a relationship with you or just a fling? tell him straight what you're really going through and tell him that you cant handle another heartache from him.
You dont mind to start from scratch if he is way over the girl and willing to give this relationship a shot...
Another way is that maybe you too should just have some cooling period and stay away from each other for 2 months or so...if after that...you 2 still have feelings for each other then...goodie :) That way you know it's not a rebound.
2007-01-17 21:27:46 · answer #3 · answered by Aranel 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Kimmie my dear, what you need is some confirmation; so lets us get some now.
Would you sleep with him knowing that deep down inside he still dreams of J?
Would you knife him if you heard him call out to J while making out with you?
Would you hang yourself if at the first sign of new trouble you see him running back into J's loving arms?
Would you be able to control yourself if he were to dance with J at a party that he invited you to attend with him?
Will you live your life for him and die inside?
Is there no-one else in your world but him?
Can you not give other guys a chance?
Can you not give yourself a decent choice?
Don't you want a happy life?
Don't you deserve a brighter future?
Because darling, your guy's a do no gooder, a worthless pile of ****, the very rubbish of society that brings a shadow to the world we live in... So turn around and walk away, for the sun is currently behind you to cast a shadow before you... Turn away and face the light your life is brighter without him to cloud your days.
2007-01-18 04:19:16 · answer #4 · answered by phillip_khoo 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Stop. Put on the brakes and let this one go. Sorry, but this sounds like a situation that is obviously going nowhere. So, is he just going to come crawling back to you every time something else doesn't work out? You deserve a guy who really wants to be with you, no questions asked. Not a wishy washy guy who wants to play silly games with your head. He's already chosen someone else over you once before. Time for you to choose someone else over him.
2007-01-18 01:32:02 · answer #5 · answered by Little Girl Blue 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Kimmie , you have being asking these questions over and over and your not going to go off anyones advice , why keep asking . You obviously feel for this dude and nothing we can tell u is going to change it so maybee just give it a go and if it doesent work out then say next and move on . I can tell you have lots of feelings and like to share stories so it seems your very emotional driven . Woman are anyways but you are a lover personality type i think so you quickly go mushy on people and devalop feelings .
2007-01-18 00:32:42 · answer #6 · answered by badass-mofu 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Good Luck, I was in a similar situation from 1984 to 1994. When we were together people thought we were a married couple and everything was incredibly good. When we were broke up (the "I want to / think we should date other people crap) it was something she always initiated. But I was in Love and for 10 years and about 6 episodes of this crap put myself through pure hell time after time!
I would say privately reminisce the good times (if there really were any, be honest w/ yourself) and move on .........................................
2007-01-25 19:07:06 · answer #7 · answered by Patrick M 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sweets I feel you should put him out of your mind right away. He is toying with your emotions and it would leave you more hurt than now if he gets a chance to have his way again. The fact that he has once dumped you for someone else and now is dumping her to come to you shows that he is indeed a selfish guy who is always in search of things that make him feel good without giving importance to others' emotions. I believe the girl that you are, you deserve someone more genuine who would make you feel like a princess instead of a slave to be at his beck and call (not literally but emotionally, i mean)........here's a warm hug coming your way http://www.123greetings.com/events/hug_day/hug10.html
2007-01-19 07:48:20 · answer #8 · answered by lisa.reeves 1 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Hi Kimee
I think you already know the answer... but you can't bring yourself to the realisation of it!
Let him go ... If its a full-on relationship you want go look elsewhere. don't allow yourself to be anyones second choice.
You are just a backup for him till someone else comes along he fancies.
All the while you listening to his problems you going nowhere!
You could be sharing time with someone who appreciates you & wants the same things as you do.
You gotta get out more!
I don't mean to be brutal, but... if you don't want good advice don;t ask.
take care
2007-01-25 19:53:04 · answer #9 · answered by healer 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Stop.
You are young enough to find someone better.
Remember Love is for life, choose right, when the time is right get married,make a family & stay together.
Having kids is absolutely fantastic start around 24 years old & you will be young enough to enjoy.
2007-01-17 21:31:59 · answer #10 · answered by ANDREW H 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋