I am Adopted and am looking for my mom???

Question

I was adopted at birth and the LDS social services won't give me any names. Does anyone know how I penetrate their system to get a name or address???

Answer 1

You'll have to do some research into the laws of the state in which the adoption took place. Few states allow for the disclosure of information that would identify the birth parent(s). However, many states do have statutes under which an adoptee is entitled to obtain so-called non-identifying information; that generally includes things like age, race, religion, education, number of siblings, age of siblings, information about their parents (ie where they were from, occupation in general terms (such as "civil servant"). It will not include names, but it can provide information that will help you find your birth parents (birth mother, in your case) if you want to. I'm not saying it will give you enough information to find her...but it could, and, it's a start. Generally, the relevant agency would require a letter, or a specific form, from you requestion that information.

If your adoptive parents are alive, ask them what they know -- they may know more than you realize (and maybe more than they themselves realize) and be willing to share it with you. Also review any documents, if they have them.

Don't overlook the value of your birth certificate. It is the rare situation when an adoptee applies for a birth certificate and is accidentally provided with a copy of the original birth certificate, but it has happened. But that's not what I mean, actually. Depending on where you were born/where your birth certificate was issued, it could contain information to help you find your birth mother. For example, while the name on your birth certificate was changed when your birth certificate was re-issued way back when, other information -- including a series of numbers on the certificate -- would not have been. At least in NY, that number might as well have been a social security number for births, and was listed in the NY Birth Index....along with the infant's date of birth, sex, and birthname. (So with that number, I was able to browse the Birth Index for the year in which I was born....stop at any entry recording a birth on my birth date...look if the infant was male or female....and, if female, check the recorded number against the number on my birth certificate. In this way I was able to find my birthname, and, ultimately, my birth mother.)

It's very unlikely that there is any legal direct means for you to find out who your birth mother is, but you may have access to information that can provide you with good clues, and take it from there. Maybe you'll get lucky that way.

Also, there are registries, on a national and state level, for adoptees looking for birth parents. I don't think they are particularly effective, but there's no harm in registering with them. (Most allow for the disclosure of information only if both adoptee and birthparent have registered.)

I hope that helps you start, and I wish you the best of luck with your search.

Answer 2

You will have to go to the place in which your adoption happened. There really is not way of finding out much about them and where they are unless people will let you. It is very hard to crack files these days.

You need to ask your parents who your biological parents were and maybe they will have some of the answers you need.

A lot of adoptions are closed meaning you cannot obtain the information because everyone felt that was to your benefit at the time. My brother in law was adopted and we watched as he suffered not knowing who and where he came from. He could not get answers, and he was like you willing to do something illegal to get his information, but he was detoured by a friend and in time the information showed up on his door step. Most times it does. You may be looking for your biological parents but you may also have them and sibling out there looking for you. Please consider the consiquences of what might happen if you do something illegal. For you and your family and for the family that may also be looking for you.

Answer 3

That's crazy. I respect their keeping promises they make with those who chose to give up their children. However, if you have medical issues and absolutely need the information I think you could probably get something done, but that me just making an assumption. If it's for your own satisfaction I would say be happy with who you are and make something of yourself.

Answer 4

How are you going to find your mom like this??