Should I stop spanking my 15yo son?

Question

He told me the other day that he was getting 'too old'. But I say your never to old for a good old fashion butt whoppin

Answer 1

I think you have to do what you think is right. I would try to find other methods at that age, but that's just my opinion. I don't have teens yet, but the plan is to not use spanking anymore when they turn that age.

Good Luck

Answer 2

Depends. Nowadays, it's considered evil to spank a child when their younger, so of course people are going to say you're an abusive pervert if you're spanking your son at 15. And of course, kids are going to think they are "too old" for spankings. They don't exactly enjoy it that much.

I say it depends on what works. Spanking should always be used as a last resort (ie: after groundings, and other things have been tried). Except if they put their life in danger, but your son is 15. It would be horrible if he still doesn't know how to look both ways before crossing the street.

If spanking is the only thing that works, go for it. For me, groundings was a joke. I'm serious. Every child and teenager is different. And as long as he's still a minor and living under your roof, he has to abide by the rules. I'm not saying bruise him up and break his bones, but there's really nothing wrong with spanking a 15 year old if it's the only way to get through.

Some kids think that if they don't get spanked, they can do and talk to their parents anyway they please because they aren't scared of the consequences... Example? http://answers.yahoo.com/question/index;_ylt=AmSPk9b.LV7iEBZ3FyE3DN7sy6IX?qid=20070116175053AAZB1RH&show=7#profile-info-6c6ddf6eddb234e3c2d1e1f71643cbb7aa

Answer 3

If it works, then by all means continue it. If it seems that all you do is spank him and he continues to do what he pleases then stop. Find another way. I was raised in a community that is conservative and very christian. These are people who still try to teach their kids morals and values and still use "old school" ways of disciplining their kids. It is not uncommon for older kids to get spanked. Look at how kids are raised in rural areas. These are still the same conservative, christian communities they were 10, 20, 30 years ago and these people have hels on to the more traditional ways of bringing up kids. They don't have some of the problems with their kids that more suburban, liberal thinking parents have with their children. I'm not saying that being a forward, liberal thinker is a bad thing, just that the "old" ways not be completely discounted based on pyscho-babble.

Answer 4

There are SO many other ways to communicate with a 15 year old, and he can surely be reasoned with and other consequences thought of that do NOT require physical punishment. Look for a Parent Effectiveness Training seminar, or order the book NOW. You will get some very practical help in working with your son. Please do this, or see a social worker or therapist for some worthwhile coaching. As another participant mentioned, you are teaching your son to be violent, and that "might makes right", neither of which our society or this planet needs to be brought forth. Congrats on bringing this to light!

Answer 5

I can't remeber the last time my dad spanked me was, but I know at 15 there were no more spankings, now grounding on the other hand that was different. I remember there was a time that I got grounded from one grade card to the next...man that was a long time.

I don't think spanking a 15 yo is wrong, it all depends on the child. If he still reacts to spank sure go for it, but most teens could rather not have them but could care less (in the punishment department.)

Answer 6

Spanking a 15 yr old, is not spanking, its abuse. Reason I say that, is because the maturaty level is WAY different between a child and a 15 yr old teen. As far as the "good ol fashion way"- Just cause thats the way it used to be done, DOES NOT MAKE IT WRITE, we are suppose to learn from our mistakes of the past, your just being stubborn and trying to justify what you are doing as right. NOT SO. SORRY. I COMPLETELY understand the frustration it is dealing with that, BUT there are other ways to deal with it, we arent perfect and sometimes we make mistakes as parents, but again, its not ok to justify those mistakes as being "ol fashioned" and ok! If you cant figure out an alternative route, call a psychologist or go to counciling with him. Good luck, dont take my answer defensively, im not attacking you, just trying to get through... hope everything works out for you! :)

Answer 7

Hi James,

yea I think 15 yr old is way too old for spanking. They'd feel embarrased and insulted even if it wasn't done in front of ppl. Even kids age 2 already have self dignity and feel embarrased when I scolded them. Example, my kids. They are 5 and 3. And everytime I scold them, especially my daughter who was 3 then, she'd draw a broken heart on a piece of paper and gave it to me. It's her expression of how her heart broke when I scolded her. So now, I always tell them that I'm angry with them each time they're wrong. And I say it in a very firm tone. And i've to say they abide better than before. They used to retaliate more before. Maybe that's their way to show they're not happy with me for spanking their bottom (though it was just a light spank) and scolded them when they're wrong.
If you ask me, I'd say a firm tone will do just good than spanking. Kids and especially teenagers will retaliate more if they don't like the way they are reprimanded :)

Answer 8

Spanking is not an effective discipline for a 15 year old. Taking away freedom is more effective and taking away things like the computer, telephone, video games are even more effective.

Answer 9

15 come on man think about it in 3 year he will be old enough to drink and if your spanking him for somthing he has done think of anther punishment like gronding him for a week no going out to friends houses or watching tv or playing computer games stuff like that i think 15 is to old to get a smack of mum and dad and maybe if you stop that and show him some respect he will do the same

Answer 10

I'm thinkin that when they are big enough to turn around and whip you, they're too old.

Seriously, don't you think you can come up with something better? Spanking a 15 year old goes deeper than spanking a 5 year old. It's humilating and degrading, treating him like a baby.