How do I tell the guy that Ive been sleeping with that I now have chlamydia??? He is the only person I have been with. I still want to be with him if he gets treated. But I some how get the feeling he will not have any thing to do with me after this. Even though he was the only one... Please help me. I m very hurt and upset. I have never in my klife had any thing...
2007-01-17 09:20:35 · 34 answers · asked by lady bug 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Its very sweet of you to be concerned with how he is going to react, and I am suprised that you are not angry... was he tested for STD/STI's before you had intercourse? I would start the discussion with, "You know I trust you, and there is something I need to discuss with you. Please try to keep your mind open, and I will listen to you as well. I noticed (meantion symptoms that caused you to go get checked) and went to get it looked at, and well, I have chlamydia. You are the only person I have slept with, and I am sure that you didnt know that you had this or you would have taken care of it..." kinda like that. Now keep in mind that this is just an idea, and your discussion could possibly go differently than that. Make sure that you both get treatment, and if you do stay together, make sure and get tested again for *everything* again in 6 months just to be sure everything is ok.
2007-01-17 09:31:35 · answer #1 · answered by liebedich85 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Wait, let me get this straight, YOU have never been with anyone else--and you have chlamydia?! Honey!! That means HE gave it to you!
It almost doesn't matter how you approach this! If he leaves you when you are willing to accept this and move forward together, then he's an asshole and you can do better!
But to answer your question, just be real mellow and tell him when you are all alone that you went to the doctor and found out that you have this "issue" and that he should get checked to. Ask him if he has ever had it before...if he gets confrontational, then just hold your ground. He is likely to be very embarrassed. Remind him that you have been faithful, and that you are willing to forgive him for his transgressions. If he needs to blow off some steam, let him go and he'll call you later.
But DO NOT sleep with him again until he gets treated!
By the way, I respect you for being so caring and forgiving of this man that you love. I would not be. I would GO OFF! He wouldn't know what hit him!
2007-01-17 09:30:17 · answer #2 · answered by Uebermaedchen 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Girl; Stick up for yourself. Its hard for a guy to not know that he has the clap. A woman can have it and not even realize it. A man has certain symptoms that cannot go unrecognized. The only thing I can think of is maybe he thought it was a urinary tract infection. Anyway. You need to be sincere and understanding that he has had others before you and that you have went to the doctor { i hope you have} and that he diagnosed you with an STD. Play it like you didnt want to give it to him without actually saying it. The main thing is to get him to get medicine to fix it. It doesnt really matter who had it first its the fact that it IS treatable and DOES go away after taking antibiotics. If he cant handle you talking to him about something serious like that, or gets mad at you for trying to accuse him of cheating then maybe he doesnt care about you as much as you might think. In the mean time i would let him know regardless of how he reacts that you wont be sleeping with him until he resolves it. Good Luck
2007-01-17 09:32:17 · answer #3 · answered by e_deckwa 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It's not a matter of HOW you tell him, it's more about the fact OF telling him. You MUST tell him that you've got chlamydia. Chlaymydia is a bacterial infection and can be easily treated with antibiotics. Sure its embarassing, but it happens. The important part is that you both get treated and talk to him about it.
Simple fact is that when you have sex, your partner should be using a condom. This can greatly decrease the chance of spreading it to other people.
I'm sorry that you're going through this, but it isn't the end of the world, and you should be thankful that it isn't anything more serious. Please check the article I posted in the "source" area, this is about Chlamydia from webmd. Good luck to you.
2007-01-17 09:37:36 · answer #4 · answered by allthree 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
This is from the CDC.............
Assuming you have not been doing anything with anyone else, it sounds like your b/f has some explaining to do........be glad it's not something worse!
How do people get chlamydia?
Chlamydia can be transmitted during vaginal, anal, or oral sex. Chlamydia can also be passed from an infected mother to her baby during vaginal childbirth.
Any sexually active person can be infected with chlamydia. The greater the number of sex partners, the greater the risk of infection. Because the cervix (opening to the uterus) of teenage girls and young women is not fully matured, they are at particularly high risk for infection if sexually active. Since chlamydia can be transmitted by oral or anal sex, men who have sex with men are also at risk for chlamydial infection.
2007-01-17 09:26:28 · answer #5 · answered by missourim43 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
This girl knows that he gave it to her, don't treat her like an airhead! Ok pet, just say it plain and simple like you told us, but please think long and hard about this...if he caught if from someone else, he's obviously not very responsible in the sexual department, and you were pretty naive to not be responsible either. I really don't know why you would want to stay with someone who has put you through this, but if you're willing to give him a chance, make sure its his last one. If he f**ks us again in any way, get shot of him pronto! But DO NOT keep firing it back in his face when you have an arguement.
2007-01-17 09:29:21 · answer #6 · answered by Megafunk 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
"I've been looking for the right way to say this, but I haven't found one. I will just be blunt. You infected me with chlamydia. You need to be treated and whoever the last person(s) you slept was besides me needs to be treated as well."
2007-01-17 09:26:12 · answer #7 · answered by Scott K 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Ask your knight in shining armor to go to the doctor with you. Have your doctor explain. Perhaps the doctor will be able to stress for you that your knight is the ONLY ONE with whom you have had relations. Also, kiddo, I would insist after this that he always wear a condom... Wouldn't hurt to wait for marriage so this won't happen again, either. STD's are easier to cope with than pregnancy and raising a child alone, too!
2007-01-17 09:27:29 · answer #8 · answered by Peanut 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You should let your mind settle down first.
Once everything is settled, then go and tell him, tell him what you have and tell him what you feel, but know and be prepared for the worst, he might flip it!
Give it a while to settle down in his mind and see what happens.
Last thing you want is he finding out and then jumping into conclusions and leave, it's better off if you tell him.
Good Luck
2007-01-17 09:29:07 · answer #9 · answered by calv83luc 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
is there a chance you got it from him?
1.start off with how much he means to you
2.emphasize how difficult it is to share some information with him because of your fear of how he will react
3.let him know that you'll understand if he responds negatively
4. spill it out verbally or give him a note/letter **1 paragrapher
5. ask for what he feels and emphasize that no matter what he safety/health are of your most concern
6.thank him for listening
2007-01-17 09:26:20 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋