Bad kids baby sitting nightmare solution?

Question

Hi my girlfriend is an babysitter/nanny. The kids she has are terribly behaved and are around 4 and 5 years of age. The parents were originally at fault but she is the one who takes care of them during the day. I tried to give her advice about being stricter but she said she has done that last 3 months and they don't change... any ideas how to fix this problem?

Answer 1

she can not fix the problem with out the parent's help. every one needs to be on the same page. if the parents are not helping than she will not be able to change them.
what i would do is when she watches them I would try to keep them busy . plan activities for them. if they stay busy than they won't have as much time to get into trouble.

Answer 2

First ..try not to think of them as "bad kids" really..they are good kids doing bad things. Try and find out where the bad behavior or anger is coming from. My friends daughter was shuffled around a lot..babysitter..to dad..to gramma..and sometimes everyone would get annoyed when no one had time for her and the little girl started being a total pain in the butt, but when someone finally stepped in and added some real discipline, routine and caring..it stopped. She was angry..and confused. Everyone had different rules..different ideas and different everything for her. In your girlfriends case its even harder because there is 2 of them. They get to gang up on her. You should have her put the main rules of the house in plain sight. You could even have the kids help with this. They are old enough to know what is right and by having them put in there ideas they are more likely to be followed. This way they know what is expected plain and clear. Then make the rule of what will happen when the rule is broken. Timeouts is usually best..expspecially for a babysitter. Make a spot where the timeout will be...a chair, the stairs..a corner..a rug..wherever. Explain that this is the "timeout spot" then the child sits there for 1 minute per age. (works great for my daughter..she's 4) After timeout is done you go over and talk to child calmly saying why they had a timeout then have them apologize..if the kid is not ready to apologize..then start the time over again. If the kid refuses to sit there..keep putting them back on the spot over and over and over...eventually they will stay there. (this one can take a while the first few times) THEN...make a reward system. It would be best if its a competition between them. This way they will be competeing against each other instead of them competing with each other against your girlfriend. Maybe everytime they doing something good they get a star on a board..or move there racecar picture closer to the finish line on a poster board or something..whoever gets there first wins a prize. If you are doing something unacceptable then you move back. These ideas usually help because the kids aren't in for a surprise..they know what is expected of them and what will happen if they don't follow the rules. Also do constructive things througout the day. Plan out activities etc...this way they won't be just running around and getting into trouble. Don't give up!

Hope this helps

Answer 3

First of all, we're talking about toddlers here. No three - year - old is a "rotten little tyrant." She doesn't know any better, because she hasn't been taught how to behave properly. You could call her that if she were a few years older, but it's really not her fault. Blame the parents for not teaching her if you want, but don't call a mere child such names. Now, I agree with the first answerer that the girls should have been supervised when they were playing. If they had been, this could have been nipped in the bud. I would give the little girl another chance, but supervise the kids this time. If she acts out again, tell her she must go home unless she stops. If it continues, send her home and have a word with her mother. If her parents continue to ignore the problem, then tell them that you will not have any more play dates until things change. *ETA* Yes, her mother was outside - and you weren't. That's where the problem lies. This really sounds like another case of "My Child Can Do No Wrong Syndrome."

Answer 4

Tell her not to worry. She isn't doing anything wrong. If one thing doesn't work after 3 months, try another. Children who have to be away from their parents for long periods of time sometimes get confused about who is in charge. Most of the time they just don't know what to think. Tell her to try something different, and stick to it for at least 1 month. The kids will get used to it, trust me.It might mean being the bad guy for a while, but it will pay off in the long run. Hang in there, I know it's tough.

Answer 5

Sounds like their parents need to call Super Nanny. She just has to love them and make them mind the best she can. Get on their level when she has to correct them.

Answer 6

kids are hard to change but once you do its so nice. i have 2 kids staying with me that had an abusive mother and we are working on trust, the main thing is getting the kids to have fun. spend lots of time with them. all they want is attention and love. kids act up to get attention. good or bad they dont care. so instead of putting them in front of the t.v. make cookies or color with them. wish her good luck from me i know how hard it can be.

Answer 7

she's not the one who should be setting boundaries, that's the parents job. If kids have two different sets of boundaries, one with her and one with the parents, nothing will change. There has to be consistency

Answer 8

Everyone has to be in on it. You need the parents to jump on the band wagon, otherwise it won't do much good.

Answer 9

they are acting out because of a lack of give a **** from their parents- she needs to give them love and show that she cares

susan

Answer 10

tell her not to give in to them. don't feed them any sugar. no even juice with sugar. when they act up put them in time out. make them listen and if they don't tell there parents when they come and get them.