how do you know if a guy is "slow" or "just not that interested" in you? ANSWERS FROM GUYS ARE VERY WELCOM!

Question

I'm 35, professional female- single and I like this guy I know at my company who's 43 white professional male and is single -- has been for a long time, actually!!. We walk together every day along with two other colleagues. Last December (06) the two of us went out to see shows (twice) they were shows I had brought up and he said he was interested to see them so we went and saw them and he took me to dinner afterwards both times. But, he hasn't asked me out yet. He hasn't called even though he has my cell phone number( and he sees me at work every day). Is he not into me or is he slow? or?

Answer 1

There could be millions of reasons why he's not picking up the pace if he likes you. Maybe he has personal issues to wrap up (finances, ex, kids, support payments whatever). Maybe he's slightly depressed and not really motivated. Maybe he has erection issues that he's not contended with. Maybe he has other health issues that may affect him that he's not willing to come out with. Maybe he's secretly bi or gay or maybe he sees someone else on & off. Quite honestly it may have nothing to do with you! Or he could just be a bit shy or commitment-prone and knows what you want *but that he could never deliver.*

Start having conversations about "other peoples," relationships on a casual basis (make up someone) and then ask his opinion about "that." This is a way to get into his head without confronting him head on. The reasons for his lack of effort could be very complex and might not have *anything* to do with you.

He might be attracted to you "but not enough* to pursue you bc he knows in his heart he would eventually end it and then he'd have to deal with the office thing forever. Maybe he hasn't felt any "chemistry," yet (or may never). He might be conscious of legalities and not want to mix business with pleasure.

In the meantime, keep your options open. Maybe even let on you have another date "next weekend," and see how he reacts.

Confronting him head-on seems "easier," but it could potentially be more damaging to the relationship and no one likes getting hit in the face with a Mac Truck. Use some finesse!

Answer 2

well you might have hit it right on the head with the second "or" however there still is a chance that he is just "slow" as you call it. ask yourself a few questions. were the show that you went to see shows that a married man would see with his wife because he WANTED to or would the married man see it because it would be anice thing to do with his wife. if the answer to that is because it was a nice thing to do with his wife, this man may be gay cosidering that he went with you and did not make a move

tough question best of luck

Answer 3

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Answer 4

I think hes just taking his time. Ask him if hes interested in you.

Answer 5

just go up to him and ask him out. if he says yes then u know he is interested in u.

Answer 6

you know...sometimes some relationships wont work better then a friendship ... maybe he dont want more then a friendship with ya...or maybe is to slow...try to show him that you like him more then a friend...

Answer 7

It is too soon to tell.
Keep spending time together and see where it leads.

Answer 8

ask him if he's into you...its the only way that u'll find out

Answer 9

maybe he believes don't mix work with pleasure....