i need some good jokes i have not had one in like 2weeks
2007-01-17 04:54:27 · 12 answers · asked by inzo 1 in Entertainment & Music ➔ Jokes & Riddles
why did the orange stop
2007-01-17 04:59:35 · answer #1 · answered by john h 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
A guy walks into a whorehouse. He goes up to the madam and says "Hey, I'm a little short on cash. What can I get for $10?"
She reaches under the counter, grabs a key, then extends both hands; one with an open palm, the other with the key. He places the $10 in her palm and takes the key.
"Room 2A," the madam says.
He goes up to room 2A and opens the door.
There's no girl. No bed. Just a chicken in the corner of the room some bright lights, and a mirror on the wall.
He looks around, shrugs his shoulders, then closes the door. Then he unzips and starts (censored) the chicken in (censored) like there's no tomorrow.
Pleasently surprised by his experience and feeling "lucky", he returns a few hours later with $5 in hand, and asks the Madam what he can get for $5. She hands him the key to room 2B.
He goes up to 2B, opens the door, and there's a man peeking into a window. Behind the window are a couple of guys (censored) eachother. He looks at the man, puzzled, and asks "you like watching this stuff?"
The man replies "you should've been here a few hours ago! Some guy was in there (censored) a chicken!"
2007-01-17 05:19:07 · answer #2 · answered by Mickey Mouse Spears 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Bubbas love life was kinda slow so he asks billy bob how to get more action billy bob tells bubba to get a real tight pair of them there spedoes and put a tennis ball in them and go to the beach and strut his stuff so he does and everybody jest looks with disgust making rude comments under there breath bubba doesn't understand so he leaves and goes to billy bobs to ask why he is having no luck with the ladies with his new suit billy bob takes one look and says good god bubba you were supposed put the tennis ball in the front not back.
2007-01-17 05:07:38 · answer #3 · answered by delmonticoman 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
There is a guy named Steve, he is a tall, strong and very attractive guy – but unfortunately he is also a simpleton, i.e. innocent and dumb.
Steve is sitting on a rather empty train across from a hot lady wearing a tight mini skirt. Despite his efforts, he is unable to stop staring at the top of her thighs. To his delight, he realizes she has gone without underwear.
The woman realizes he is staring and asks, ’Are you looking at my pu**y?’
Steve feels guilty and apologizes “Yes, I’m sorry. I promise I won’t look at it again.”
The woman turns back, but after a while smiles and looks back at him and says “Hey! It’s quite alright…it’s very talented, watch this, I’ll make it blow a kiss to you.”
Sure enough the pu**y blows him a kiss.
Steve, who is completely absorbed, inquires what else the wonder pu**y can do.
’I can also make it wink,’ says the woman. Steve stares in amazement as the pu**y winks at him.
’Come and sit next to me,’ suggests the woman, patting the seat. Steve moves over.
The woman is now visibly horny and asks Steve, ’Would you like to push a couple of your fingers in?’
Stunned, Steve replies, ’What! Can it whistle, too?’
2007-01-17 05:00:17 · answer #4 · answered by Bonita Applebaum 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes i have a funny joke it is about a snowy surpise! After the first snow of the season, all of my friends got into a snowball fight with a bunch of guys in my class.It was totally fun, untill i got smacked with the nastiest ball ever! When it hit my face, i knew it wasn't the normal snowball. It was sort of warm and smelled Bad. As soon as it dropped to the ground i looked down to discover it was yellow! I got pelted with a pee pee ball! and everyone at the snowy surpise was laughting at me i was known as the pee pee girl.
2007-01-17 05:09:49 · answer #5 · answered by lil boosie 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Why does hellen keller masturbate w/one hand?
because she moans w/the other.
How did Helen Keller drive herself crazy?
she tried to read a stucco wall.
What's the name of HK favorite book?
"around the block in 80 days
Have you heard of the new HK doll?
wind it up and it walks into walls
Did you know that helen keller had a dollhouse in the backyard?
neither did she
How did HK's teachers punish her for talkin in class?
they made her wear mittens.
....okay not incredibly hysterical--will come up w/really good one's later. hope there was atleast 1 giggle :-D
2007-01-17 05:09:39 · answer #6 · answered by deirdrefaith 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
God appears to a man and tells him that he'll have to quit cigarettes, drink and sex if he wants to go to heaven.
A week later, God reappears and asks the man how it's going.
Man says "the cigarettes and drink were easy to give up, but when my wife bent over to take meat out of the freezer I couldn't resist and had to give her one there and then!"
God says "they don't like that sort of thing in heaven"
Man replies
"they didn't like it much in Walmart either!"
2007-01-17 05:00:37 · answer #7 · answered by chante 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The three men were talking about their honeymoon night when the Frenchman said ‘On our honeymoon, I made love, twenty-six times, and the next morning, my wife said to me ‘Darling that was wonderful, that was wonderful’. The Englishman said ‘On our honeymoon, we made love, fourteen times, but by coincidence, the next morning my wife said to me ‘Darling that was wonderful, that was wonderful’. Paddy said ‘Ah, there must be something wrong with me, I only had it the once’. The others asked ‘And what did your wife say to you next morning’. Paddy replied ‘She said ‘For Gods sake take it out Paddy and let me have some sleep’.
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2007-01-17 05:04:57 · answer #8 · answered by thomasrobinsonantonio 7 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Look up my Yahoo 360 Blog, I've posted plenty of good jokes:
http://blog.360.yahoo.com/blog-T..eqM4hc6n.vGH4HOx_8xHcFJw-;_ylt=Ahat3GeuW0RkiKhiIh7GdQaqAOJ3?cq=1
enjoy :-)
2007-01-17 04:58:40 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
So there are two muffins in an oven
One muffin goes to the other muffin, "Whew, it's hot in here."
and the other muffin goes,"Oh my God! A talking muffin!"
2007-01-17 05:00:18 · answer #10 · answered by sox4life103 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋