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this will be good for the point chasers and do some good at the same time cos we all need a gigle to lift us and agood belly laugh always gets rid of the grumps and grones so come on all you lot lets see what you got Make my day do feel lucky.

2007-01-17 04:06:01 · 19 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships Singles & Dating

19 answers

Blond Joke

A man is in his front yard mowing his lawn when his saw his attractive blond female neighbour go out to the mailbox. She opened it and slammed it shut then made her way back to the house.

A few moments later she came out again. She checked the mailbox, slammed it shut and angrily went back in the house.

As the man was getting to the edge of his garden, he noticed her come back out again, go to the mailbox open it and slam it shut once again, harder than ever.

Puzzled by her actions the man asked her "Is there anything wrong?"

To which she replied "There certainly is"

Get ready for the punchline!

"My stupid computer keeps saying "You've got mail"

Ta dah!!!!

2007-01-17 04:39:27 · answer #1 · answered by peachy 3 · 1 0

This Site Might Help You.

RE:
who can cheerer up an old man.?
this will be good for the point chasers and do some good at the same time cos we all need a gigle to lift us and agood belly laugh always gets rid of the grumps and grones so come on all you lot lets see what you got Make my day do feel lucky.

2015-08-06 10:26:12 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0 0

If you want to eat truly healthy, lose body fat consistently, normalize your blood pressure, cholesterol levels, prevent cancer, and even boost your brain health and energy levels, you may have heard all over the news that the Paleo Diet has been found to be one of the best methods of achieving all of these benefits compared to any other popular "fad" diets out there. Go here https://tinyurl.im/aHLuW

The truth is that the Paleo Diet will never be considered a fad because it's just simply the way that humans evolved to eat over approximately 2 million years. And eating in a similar fashion to our ancestors has been proven time and time again to offer amazing health benefits, including prevention of most diseases of civilization such as cancer, heart disease, alzheimers, and other chronic conditions that are mostly caused by poor diet and lifestyle. One of the biggest misunderstandings about the Paleo Diet is that it's a meat-eating diet, or a super low-carb diet. This is not true

2016-04-22 10:00:28 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0 0

Cellulite does not come from a single cause. It almost always comes from a combination of generic and hormonal factors.Some wrong behaviors, however, can cause or even worsen cellulite: a life that is too sedentary, altered blood circulation, incorrect diet with insufficient intake of fluids, smoking and alcoholic beverages, high heels and close-fitting garments. The plasma fluid, transudated from impaired and weakened capillaries, accumulates and stagnates in surface adipose tissue.
Cellulite can be reduced by a balanced diet and specific treatments https://tr.im/KPZek

2015-02-14 20:59:40 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0 0

Cellulite does not come from a single cause. It almost always comes from a combination of generic and hormonal factors.Some wrong behaviors, however, can cause or even worsen cellulite: a life that is too sedentary, altered blood circulation, incorrect diet with insufficient intake of fluids, smoking and alcoholic beverages, high heels and close-fitting garments. The plasma fluid, transudated from impaired and weakened capillaries, accumulates and stagnates in surface adipose tissue.
Cellulite can be reduced by a balanced diet and specific treatments https://tr.im/IyJf3

2015-01-31 09:25:04 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 1 0

An old man made love to a 20 yo woman. Then he went to confession and told the priest he had great sex with a young woman. So the priest told him to say some prayers, but the old man said it wouldn't matter because he's Jewish. So the priest says "Then why did you come into the confessional and tell me?" The old guy says "what the hell, I'm going around telling everybody!"

2007-01-17 04:18:07 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 2 0

An 80-year-old man went to his doctor for his annual check-up.

The doctor asks him how he's feeling. The 80-year-old says, "I've never felt better. I now have a 20 year-old bride who is pregnant with my child. What do you think about that?"

The doctor considers his question for a minute and then begins. "I have an older friend, much like you, who is an avid trophy hunter and never misses a season. One day, when he was going out hunting, he was in a bit of a hurry and accidentally picked up his walking cane instead of his gun. When he got to the creek, he saw a prime beaver sitting beside the stream of water. He raised his cane and went 'bang, bang'. Suddenly, two shots rang out and the beaver fell over dead. What do you think of that?"

The 80-year-old said, "I'd say somebody else pumped a couple of rounds into that beaver."

The doctor replied, "My point exactly."

2007-01-17 04:16:45 · answer #7 · answered by δώδεκα 5 · 1 0

Well Sir,I 'll be glad to cheer you up ,Right now I am putting my old costumes,I was a cheer leader in my school 48 years ago.Oops! it is too tight now,well,my costume is not like the girls wearing now a days,too skimpy ,nothing left for the man imaginations.Start working your imagination now,I am fully covered on this outfit,thank god for that, my hips are fat,legs are full of cellulite......sagging here and there...Hurray!!Hurray!! ohhh! my dentures fell. HOW DID I DO????

2007-01-17 05:08:09 · answer #8 · answered by Vannili 6 · 0 1

A couple were married and, following the wedding, the husband laid down some rules.

"I'll be home when I want, if I want, and at what time I want," he insisted. "And, I don't expect any hassle from you. Also, I expect a decent meal to be on the table every evening, unless I tell you otherwise. I'll go hunting, fishing, boozing, and card-playing with my buddies whenever I want. Those are my rules," he said. "Any comments?"

His new bride replied, "No, that's fine with me. But, just understand that there'll be sex here at seven o'clock every night ... whether you're here or not."

2007-01-17 04:10:47 · answer #9 · answered by ? 4 · 4 0

wife asks husband to fix broken fridge

he says what am i an electricain

wife asks husband to fix creeky front door step

he says what am i a carpenter

she asks him to fix the gas cooker

he says what am i a gas man

husband goes to the pub and after a while he comes back and steps on the creeky step but it doesnt creek,
he goes to the fridege and the light comes on,
he goes to cooker and theres gas in it.....

very confused he asks whife who fixed everything??

well says wife this sexy stranger saw me crying and offered to fix everything

oh what did you pay him says the husband??

he wanted me to bake a cake or have sex with him

so did he like the cake says the husband

and the wife says what do I look like a BAKER!!!!!!!

2007-01-22 01:13:47 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0 0

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