As a single parent,i want to know how to handle my 3 years old boy,he is so naughty?

Question

Pls dont say beat cos once you beat him,he beats back and become more furious and moreover he has not started talking he only picks few words, he stated school two terms ago although we are in acommunity with mixed language,do u hkink that is responsible?

Answer 1

Have a daily routine for him and stick to it so he knows what to expect each day. Teach him discipline which is so important at this age. if you don't do it NOW, you'll screw him up.
Make a plan for yourself how to fill in your day. The fact that he's not talking, is that you made him probably lazy. If he points at his cup and say, eh eh eh and get it for him, he know you get him, so why making the hassle of speaking more words when he doesn't need to.
Go up to him at his height and say: (his name), if you want your cup, you have to ask mommy: Mommy, can you give me my cup, please. If he's throwing a fit let him, be consistent in what you're doing. he finally will figure out he need to ask, politely. Living in a community doesn't have to harm him. Kids will pick up different language as they develop their speech skills, as long as you talk to him clearly.
So, be consistent and discipline him. Do not spank him, that creates aggressive behavior. When he is naughty ive him a time out spot. Don't use his bedroom, because that's the place where he should relax and sleep, any other place is appropiate.

Answer 2

DISTRACTION (in addition to the consistency idea)! Most 3 year-olds are too young to understand even simple reasoning, so you must set up easy-to-get boundaries (things you will and won't accept). After removing dangers and other things that your naturally curious child will want to get into (like your purse, the litter box or access to the swamp in the back yard, for instance!), tell your child "no" and if he doesn't obey, try distracting him with a fun activity or something interesting, like drawing or playing with a toy. The same curiosity that gets kids into trouble can be used to divert their attention to something positive and safe! Their attention span is so short, they won't know you're doing it, either.

If this doesn't work, warn him ONCE that if he doesn't obey the RULE (this makes it less personal, and hence, less of a "contest" between you two), then he'll do a 3 minute time out (1 min. per year of age). Setting out simple rules is good, and repeat them. That way, the child will remember when you say, "No, that's breaking the rules", that there is order to be followed. Kids NEED structure and it's not too early for them to learn consequences.

They can EASILY learn this WITHOUT hitting (which includes spanking!).If he won't stay in time-out, keep putting him back, even if he throws a tantrum. If he still won't cooperate, and only as a last resort, tell him he will lose a favorite toy for awhile or not be able to watch a show, visit a friend and so on. The consequences must be immediate at this age, since they won't remember why they're losing privileges if you wait too long.

Also, USE PRAISE! Give your child positive attention when he is being cooperative, and not just when he goes out of his way to please you or produces a masterpiece clay lump! Kids thrive on your attention, so don't withhold it! Just don't go ape over it, or they'll see it as "too much" and possible fake.

Remember, you child is testing you and that's NORMAL! He's finding out who he is in the world and what his strenghths and preferences are, so don't squash that. He just needs to know NOW that there are rules wherever he goes, so that can start at home.

Knowing this, you shouldn't EVER expect to have "absolute control" over a child, at ANY age! If the kid never gets to win a "battle" or argument, or make a choice, he will eventually either lose self-confidence and be weak, or rebel and lash out! You don't want either, so let him "win" minor battles (like not eating certain foods, staying up an extra half hour or wearing what he wants, as long as it's healthy). You'd be AMAZED how much this boosts their egos and cuts down on fighting over important things!

The mixed- language COULD be a factor, but if he's still not talking after a few more months, you should have him checked by a pediatrician.

Below is an excellent article on disciplining toddlers.

Answer 3

I would never say beat because all that does is teach him that hitting is OK!
You need to put him in time out away from the toys or whatever he enjoys each and EVERY time he is naughty.
You have to consistently reinforce the rules. A time out in his room for 2 to 3 minutes or sitting in the corner not able to do what he enjoys is likely the best way to begin.
As for the talking each child begins at his own rate to speak clearly. Perhaps you need to have a physician check him out to make sure he is hearing what you say as well.
I am uncertain how he started school at 3 - preschool I would assume.... The teachers there will need to reinforce the rules by time out just as you do.
Overall this child needs love and lots of positive attention.

Answer 4

he could be frustrated b/c of communication. at the age of 2 many kids hit the "terrible twos" b/c they can't communicate very well. usually these temper tantrums are a result of them needing something or wanting something, but we don't know what b/c they can't tell us.

you son's 2's may be getting into his 3's b/c his language may be getting stunted by the mulit-lingual community. this isn't a bad thing, it's just difficult for him right now, but once he gets over the first bump he'll be talking like crazy!

as far as discipline...he needs to know that you love him all the time, but sometimes he needs to listen and that's non-negotiable.
a good way to do it is a way a friend of mine discipline's her kids. she can jsut give them a look and they know they need to shape up. the one said to her "mommy, sometimes your eyes have fists!." i thought that was cute.
so, practice your mommy looks..stare him straight in the eye and say "stop that right now...i mean it." "we don't do that b/c...."
a swat on the bottom on occasion can work with the "look", but if he doesnt' respod to that then i don't know.

it's all in the energy you present. it's like training a dog. a dog will never "sit" if you don't put forth the proper energy of "im the lead dog so you better listen". you need to present the energy of "i'm the mommy and you better pay attention." if you don't do that, then your son will always push you around and walk all over you.

good luck and take care.

Answer 5

Try the time out thing,
Sit him in a chair away from his toys or any thing breakable, and tell him he cannot get up for however minutes to age so for him 3, if he gets up the 3 mins. starts over. and before he is allowed up you tell him why he was put there and that you want an apologie, no apologie he doesnt get up. You have to show him you are the parent you are the boss and you won't back down or cave in. If he is walking all over you now it is only going to get worse, if he ever hits you put him in the chair and say he is never allowed to hit you or be mean to you. You have to keep kids on a tight yet lose leash, you cannot let them get away with anything, if you let them once they think its okay to do it again. But remember to give at the MOST 3 warning.Afterwards you can say I warned you 3 times and you didnt listen so now its time out. And dont be emabarrased to act like a parent in public, warning your child that they will be in trouble and punishing them is nothing to be ashamed of. They have to know how you expect them to act at all times. You must be consistant.
But remember you can still have good times with him, drawing together, talking, playing little games (none with hitting). You are his parent, his ONLY parent NOT his bestfriend, he will make tons of friends in his life but will only ever have one mother and thats who you need to focus on being. He will love you more for teaching him right from wrong then when you let him have everything he wants.
With my neice now 2, she tried that tantrum stuff(now this is all when she is just trying to be spolied for not getting her way or just for no reason) we dont play that, she still does at times but when she does. we look at her and say strenly -Name- stop, get up, if need to say again, get up right now, then she will get up, if she is still in a big huff crying we say stop crying, she gets quiet and we tell her to come do something like if we needed to clean her up or whatever, or we tell her to sit down, so she will cool off, then she is free to get up and play. She usually gets over it all really fast. Her big brother (4) is already very well adjusted to how the rules are, yeah he slips up a little but you dont ususally have to tell him more then twice.

Answer 6

CONSISTANCY.

It is a whole lot of work.

Being a parent is the single most difficult management job in the world.

If at three he isn't talking much, you should see a doctor.

Answer 7

No, inconsistant parenting is responsible.

You cant expect him to know how to behave if you first dont teach him, dont expect it from him EVERY TIME, and dont punish him every time he doesnt display good behavior.

He's not magically going to decide to behave. He has to be taught and punished consistantly.

Answer 8

Time out
Praise him when he does something good like dress himself
Be firm(no tv)
Try not to raise your voice

Answer 9

Watch a few episodes of SUPER NANNY!

Answer 10

Good luck!!!