My ex has just told me she has started seeing someone else and I am devastated, is there anything I can do I?

Question

cant stand the pain of this we broke up over a lot of little things and I know I had some problems but I really have managed to put my life back on track (it was not drink, drugs or violence). But now I feel like its just not worth the effort to try any more
please help

Answer 1

ok dude, I had this problem back around Easter. With a twist, she's dating the guy who was my best buddy. Annnnywho... It hurts. Yeah it friggin hurts. You know why? Because you have hope. You still see her as "YOUR girl". And no matter what she does who she's with, in your mind, she's still YOUR girl. But in her mind, she's not your girl, and she is free to do whatever the heezee she wants. So, she can mindlessly hurt you with no regard to your feelings, because hello.. you broke up. Your feelings are irrational and invalid. So in her mind the sooner you accept it, the sooner you'll feel better. And stop bothering her with your problems. Figure them out for yourself!! (that's what she wants, not what I'm saying)... So what you gotta do... Is somehow realize, that she's not yours anymore. However you do it, I dunno. It dawned on me one day, and I was like hmm. I feel ok again. I do this little "F#%k it" excercise everynow and then when I need to stop thinking about something... I literally scream it over and over in my head and convince myself that truthfully, it's not worth my concern over it. Which it's not.

So dude, to sum up... realize she's not yours anymore, she doesn't want to be yours anymore. There's a saying... If you love something, let it go. If you did a good job, it'll come back. So just F it. Let her go. She's not yours anymore, and she knows it. Oh, and inevitably you're going to become bitter and scarred from this experience, how she could do this and all that, but forgive her. When you ask yourself how the hell could she do this to me? if you do, I dunno... but if you do... just pause, and forgive her. Living a life of bitterness is being a slave to feeling small about something. Oh and your answer about not being a chode? You made one mistake. You said... think about what you're going to say before hand.... and if you think you'll be a chode don't say it.... dude... THAT is what chodes do. That's how they know you're a chode, because you're micromanaging everything, and you're not just saying whatever the hell you want like you would with your buddies.You're calculated and false and their alarms go off like mad. So thanks for playing, try again.

Good luck

Answer 2

i have been there too. As you rightly positioned, you don't desire to chop up the satisfied couple. And convinced, there'll continuously been many unfinished organisation.... that is because you've invested a mess of thoughts into the relationship. How might want to or not that is in the different case? I once went for counselling after a breakup. The cousellor instructed me that i might want to continuously have him in my heart. I hate to say that that is real. after I heard that he had gotten married, my heart actually ached even regardless of the reality that i became going out with my then boyfriend and now husband. thankfully I have a robust and solid marriage yet each so often, my ideas drifts lower back to the previous... like 6 months in the past after I ran into him on the airport. the point is, all of us want to bypass on... if he's your ex, there might want to were a reason. in case you 2 somewhat were given jointly back, an same themes which separated you 2 will resurface and also you may want to likely come to an same end.... do bypass on, and that i desire you each of the braveness and desire that you locate someone new quickly.

Answer 3

It's so hard when someone u care about has moved on with their life after a split and u haven't, especially knowing they are now with someone else. The fact that u have put your life back on track is great and don't stop putting in that effort. Make yourself a better person for "u" and your future with someone else. You pain will heal in time and when u meet someone new (and u will) you won't have the same problems u had in this relationship because u are a different, stronger, better person than before. She will be the one in the end that will look back and think she lost out and u will be happy with someone else........ultimately it will be her loss.

Answer 4

Relationships are two way streets . Your ex doesn't want to be with you anymore so you need to accept that fact and get over it. She no longer owes you anything. As for the problems you worked through that is really for yourself and not her and you will have a better life for it. Sometimes we make mistakes that we cannot undo no matter how sorry we are. Losing your wife was the consequence of these actions so now just go on with your life and let it go.

Answer 5

When the word "EX" entered into your relationship, that should of been a sign that you needed to move on. If Breaking up has helped you to change your Life , that's a good thing. The sad part is that it took her leaving to get you to do it. I suggest you take it as a positive thing and GET OVER IT and move on.

Answer 6

What your EX does now is none of your business; she is no longer a part of your life. You make it sound like she's doing this just to hurt you; she's not; she's getting on with her life.
Instead of sitting around feeling sorry for yourself, learn from your mistakes and get out and do something. In other words, get on with YOUR life. Pinning away over a lost love is not attractive to any one.

Answer 7

ouch ! that moment of a second he told you, must have pricked like a bittch ! but what you have to do is ,just don't even look behind or what she's doing ,who she is dating and aim at moving ahead. don't try to be ''friends'' right now. coz that is just not possible in your case or you'll go mad hearing about her with her man. break all contact immediately but politely. no hard feelings. and enjoy your single-dom for sometime rite now. go out with your friends,flirt it out with other cute girls.just don't hook up with anybody, just because your gf did.and once you ease out,you''ll be ready for another healthy relationship !

Answer 8

I wonder why you should ask such a quest.Move on the ration is 7:1 so you still have a chance to get the six gals.Can i hook you up?

Answer 9

You are right...It is not worth the effort. Women are fickle pains in the butt.
You have to move on.

Answer 10

Honey, you need to get out and have a good time. I think it hurts because you're realizing that she's getting over you but it seems like you're not over her.