how do i control my revengeful self?

Question

ok i have a real bad revenge problem.if someone does something to me that i dont like, i may not do it back right away, but eventually i will get them back when they least expect it.how do i bring my revengeful self down to a hault?

Answer 1

Sometimes when I'm very angry at someone I write about it in my journal. I cuss them out, tell them off and just be a bit childish. I'm adult so I really wouldn't do it to their face but on paper I can say whatever I want. It really works. It's great that you are taking the steps to stop this. In the long run getting revenge could be real trouble for YOU. YOU are the one who could end up in jail. I'm not really sure what you do to get back at them. Try to be the better person. Even if only you know that you're better that's still a major victory!! There are also anger classes. Are you in school? Maybe you can talk to the school advisor. He/she may be able to teach you skills to deal with your anger.
Heres some things I found on the web they may be able to help you.
What Should I Do If I Get Angry?
Don't lose control if you get angry. Taking it out on others never solves anything. Instead, admit to yourself that you are angry and try to figure out why. What can you do to keep the situation from happening again? If your little sister gets a toy and you don't, it's not OK to break that toy. Maybe you can ask her to share it with you. Or if your science homework is too hard, don't rip up your notebook. Ask your teacher or a parent for help instead.

It helps to talk about your anger with an adult, such as a parent, teacher, or relative. Once you talk about anger, those bad feelings usually start to go away.

Anger Busters
Here are some other things you can do when you start to feel angry:


talk to a friend you can trust
count to 10
get or give a hug
do jumping jacks or another exercise
draw a picture of your anger
play a video game
run around the outside of the house five times as fast as you can
sing along with the stereo
pull weeds in the garden
think good thoughts (maybe about a fun vacation or your favorite sport)
take a bike ride or go in-line skating
Never getting angry is impossible. Instead, remember that how you act when you're angry can make the situation better or worse. Don't let anger control you. Take charge of it!
Strategies To Keep Anger At Bay

Relaxation

Simple relaxation tools, such as deep breathing and relaxing imagery, can help calm down angry feelings. There are books and courses that can teach you relaxation techniques, and once you learn the techniques, you can call upon them in any situation. If you are involved in a relationship where both partners are hot-tempered, it might be a good idea for both of you to learn these techniques.

Some simple steps you can try:

Breathe deeply, from your diaphragm; breathing from your chest won't relax you. Picture your breath coming up from your "gut."

Slowly repeat a calm word or phrase such as "relax," "take it easy." Repeat it to yourself while breathing deeply.

Use imagery; visualize a relaxing experience, from either your memory or your imagination.

Nonstrenuous, slow yoga-like exercises can relax your muscles and make you feel much calmer.
Practice these techniques daily. Learn to use them automatically when you're in a tense situation.


I hope this helps.

Answer 2

if u can't control urself to the point of wanting to get a person back ask urself how u would feel if someone else was doing it to you, the things u want to get revenge for r they bad things or is it silly things like being shouted at, how bad has somthing got to be for u to feel this way, if you think u have a serious problem and this revenge thing is getting in the way off ur life then i sugest u go see a specialist. good luck.

Answer 3

well it is clear that you feel the need to get even, but if you really want to stop this behavior just remind yourself how it felt being done to you. if you can keep that in mind it will help you alot. good luck

Answer 4

You sound like you have anger issues....Are you a Parent, Grade-schooler (since you are in this category),,If you are either, get a grip...99% of people are just not worth it!!!!

Answer 5

That is what happens to me also and only by going to church often will curb my sinful nature. Check out

www.chc.org.sg


Hope it helps.

Regards,

Alvin Titus

Director, author
Quachee Enterprise

http://www.batikinspirations.com
http://quachee.googlepages.com/...
http://www.freewebs.com/quachee/...
http://www.quachee.com/


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Answer 6

its all self control and maturity. They go hand and hand. you must learn forgiveness and remember do unto others as you would have done unto you. good luck I wish u well.

Answer 7

go to a therapist, get to the heart of the problem, then heal :)

Answer 8

seek help...go to therapy and try and let it go...but to a limit... u cant let all of them off the hook.

Answer 9

just do it. control your behavior or the jails will control you.

Answer 10

Turn yourself to God or go to hell.