Why is premarital sex always wrong according to God?

Question

The perfect relation ship is build on Love. Within that love, how does the order in which things happen matter? If both have the feeling it's an eternal love, why would it matter to God if they first make love, and then get married?

Take me as an example. I'm a Dutch atheist, my girlfriend is a Romanian Christian. Currently we live in her country, and we plan to get married, as soon as have found a country that suits us in raising our children in the English language. We speak English to eachother, and wanna raise our kids in that language.

In Romanian visa laws, it can take a year or two before we are able to leave here. Silly, but true. We don't wanna get married here, but we are eachothers meaning in life. Of course we make love. My girlfriend is a Christian who uses logic to make most of her decisions.

So, why are God's morals so black and white? I simply fail to see that.

Answer 1

Let me try to be helpful here rather than give a useless answer like answer #1.

The real question is this: does God require a legal government entity to recognize your marriage? I don't think so, but many people need that tradition to make it "official." But if you're pledged to each other for the rest of your lives, and you ask God's blessing, I think that you're married.

Answer 2

First I have to say I don't believe that an athiest can exist, per se. For one to be an atheist they must claim to know everything there is to possibly know in the entire universe, therefore I categorize anyone claiming to be atheist as an agnostic. Though that's just me, and the same could technically be said of any theologist.

Anyway, by technical definition one could argue that you are married already by the intent of the heart and the act of intercourse consumating that intended relationship. My view is that the interpretation of scripture is/has been frequently skewed to suit certain opinions. This point on premarital sex is certainly questionable considering the patriarchal slant evidenced by the KJV translation of the scriptures. More accurate translation would probably negate several things claimed by the church for years.
I think that the church's moral's do not necessarily match with God's.

For one view on this topic see:
http://www.libchrist.com/bible/premaritalsex.html

See also this discussion:
http://www.beliefnet.com/boards/message_list.asp?discussionID=535920

A couple interesting books (Living in Sin? and Liberating the Gospels) have been written by John Shelby Spong:
http://www.dioceseofnewark.org/jsspong/

Answer 3

When a girl looses her virginity, something happens, something physical, her hymen breaks, and bleeding occurs.

Throughout the bible you will see blood sacrafices, or covenants made with blood.

The act of saving oneself for marriage, is a covenant that is sealed so to speak on the wedding night. The dedication of two people becoming as one is witnessed by the blood from the woman. It is an oath through the body that cannot be broken, that is why divorce is not allowed, only under extreme circumstances in the bible.

Answer 4

Well it looks like you are searching for a logic so you have have sex with your girlfriend. But here is an answer and my belief.

pre-marital sex isn't an unforgivable sin against God. In fact, it was not uncommon in the time of the writings. I don't think it is a sin at all. It is, however, a moral code. It really is, up to you.

Answer 5

"make love" is just a term made by men to give a new perspective of having sex. Even if you plan to marry your girlfriend, you still arent married yet right? It is actually your responsibility to make sure nobody does that to your future wife instead of doing that with her. the way i see it, Without marriage which means complete responsibility to each other ,making love is not actually love,it is lust.and it wont bring your relationship to a higher level or so,as a lot of people see it that way.god bless

Answer 6

What good is a "Christian" who uses logic to reject the teachings of Christ?? Premarital sex is immoral because the purpose of sex is reproduction, and children have a right to be born into the stable family unit that results from marriage. People who truly love each other do what is best for each other, and therefore don't lead each other into behaviors that can result in eternal damnation.
.

Answer 7

Sex is a gift given to mankind by God. It is a physical celebration of the union of marriage and the love in that union, and of the sacrafice of the partners to each other. Sex is also given for a share in the creative power of God - the transmission of life: children.

Understanding that it is a celebration of the marriage convenant, it is therefore immoral to participate in sexual intercourse outside of marriage.

Answer 8

god often is really a conservative person leading others who want same thing. the definition is: somewhere, someone out there is having fun and enjoying life, so we must outlaw fun and natural things as seen in nature and try to control others.

see also Sam Clemmens of USA-

The so-called Christian nations are the most enlightened and progressive...but in spite of their religion, not because of it. The Church has opposed every innovation and discovery from the day of Galileo down to our own time, when the use of anesthetic in childbirth was regarded as a sin because it avoided the biblical curse pronounced against Eve. And every step in astronomy and geology ever taken has been opposed by bigotry and superstition. The Greeks surpassed us in artistic culture and in architecture five hundred years before Christian religion was born."

..........Mark Twain, a Biography

Answer 9

Well, using your logic it is okay to have homosexual sex. If you can do it why can't gay people. I see no difference. I see nothing but condemnation for the gay people but it is okay to have consential fornication if you are straight. You people wonder why there is so much heated discussion here.

Answer 10

Why don't you marry the girl and give her rights as of ur wife?Prevents her from getting exploited!!!
It actually leads to other complications,you are sleeping with someone's mother daughter sister or even wife..It gives rise to the feeligns of resentment and frusttration..look at the moral decays of the western society,Crime rate in america for example..

Allah says in the Quran:
"Do not go near to adultery. Surely it is a shameful deed and evil, opening roads (to other evils)" (Quran 17:32)."