Were they wrong for being selfish and not thinking of my safety? or was I for wanting to finish getting ready?

Question

I got a discount hotel room through my work for a concert in Grand Rapids for me, my bf, his roommate, bro and sis. My bf's friends had two other rooms. Show gets cancelled so we decide on bars that night. Everyone does their own thing at the hotel until about 10pm. After swimming, I jump in the shower and the other (drunk) group calls us when I get out and says they are going out in 10 min. I can't leave since my hair is wet and I'm not ready yet. I ask my group to stay and they all say no and that I'm being a baby. So I stay there by myself to get ready. bf asks if i'll be ok. i say i'm a big girl I can take care of myself. My bf leaves me his sis's cell to get directions. I was ready 20 min after they left. So bf calls me right after I leave the hotel and get directions from the valet. Bf offers directions and I say I already have them and end the call abruptly because I'm pissed. I get to the bar and everyone compliments me on how I looked (since I took the time to look nice).

I think they were wrong. Especially my boyfriend, because it's grand rapids. We are out of town and I end up walking by myself because no one had the decency to even offer to stay 20 min longer so I could get ready. I would do that for them. And no one thanked me for the cheap room. I think I got the shaft. But everyone else says I was being difficult because I didn't leave with them.

I asked him to stay and everyone else. but no one would. so I acted like it was no big deal because it really hurt my feelings. i'm not going to force or beg someone to think about me. In a group of people, you look out for everyone not just yourself. it's common sense and respect.

No one really made a set time. and the drunks just called at the last minute and said we all had to leave right then and there. and no one wanted to wait on me. so why should I just drop everything I need to do to get ready just because they can't be patient for me. and then blame me for being mad about it and acting like it didn't bother me. i'm not going to let people push me around. I was sticking up for myself.

I asked them to stay. I asked him to stay. I said that I didn't want to walk by myself. but no one seemed to care about me at all. they all wanted to do what they wanted to do.

Answer 1

I would say it depends on the situation. Did you all agree on a time to leave? If so, it would probably be your fault for keeping the group behind. If it was the kind of thing where they just suddenly announced their intentions to go on the fly of the moment, they should have waited for you. It's just something that friends do for one another, especially a bf. But you did tell you're bf that you're a big girl, so I thought it was kinda uncalled for that you got pissed at him later. If you tell him you'll be ok, then he will think that. There is no reason to get mad at him afterwards. But he should have waited for you nonetheless, but it was nice of him to ask about you. He would have been a jerk if he just took off with his buddies and not asked you at all.

Answer 2

This is just me but have-n had jerks for bf myself I say no matter what u said to him,he still knew U wanted and needed someone there with u. If he really was a good care-n bf he would have waited for u or came back for u. I say let him know how u feel about him leave-n you and if he acts uncare-n let him go and find someone who will care more about your safety.

Answer 3

I think you're right and have all the rights to be pist off because they didnt take the time to wait a few minutes for you which wouldnt have made a difference for them. Plus they didnt take the time to Thank You for the hotel rooms. Dont think it was wrong to be mad or hang up the phone rudly because they deserved it. Maybe you should tell your boyfriend to not take it the wrong way but they were being unpatient and they couldve took a little of their time to wait for you.. Well goodluck!!

Answer 4

You can choose your friends my dear.The operative word being 'CHOOSE'.They sound like a bunch of inconsiderate So and So's.It's hard to find people that appreciate things you do for them.We,Unfortunately have a culture of ME ME ME.You are going to get a lot of selfish people in the world.It's up to us to weed out the good from the bad and sometimes a few nasties get through but that's life.Do something for YOU,and become the majority.If you can't beat'em join'em LOL.

Answer 5

Your boyfriend felt like he was supposed to look after his sister and brother so he left you behind to fend for yourself. Blood is thicker than water.
He was wrong, they could of went ahead as a couple and the two of you would join up later. He sounds like you come second to his needs. Next time you see him tell him to grow up and and treat you with the respect you deserve then send him to the store and tell him to pick himself up a backbone.

Answer 6

Your b/f asked if you'd be okay, and you responded "I'm a big girl, I can take care of myself." He took you literally, and went on to the bar. If you felt threatened, or didn't want to walk by yourself, why didn't you just say so? You need to learn to be a better communicator; instead of playing games and expecting people to do what you wish, be open and honest.

Answer 7

You're boyfriend asked if you were going to be okay. You could have said no, and asked him to stay. It sounds like he's caring enough to have stayed.

I think you're overreacting.

Answer 8

Why did you tell your boyfriend "I am a big girl I can take care of myself"? You should have told your boyfriend that you expect him to escort you instead.

Answer 9

yer bf is a jerk
(not to excuse anyone else...)

Answer 10

dont overact